Am I being ungrateful?

Re: Am I being ungrateful?

• kmjarvey

  

  July 2010

  I haven't but how's the return policy at the store? I would thank the guests for their gifts and then exchange if for the things you really need if the store will do in store credit or something.

  
  

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• banana468 member

  

  July 2010

  FWIW, I didn't get a lot of pricey stuff for a shower gift.  Our China wasn't purchased until the wedding approached.  For most showers I've attended, the shower gift is much less expensive than the wedding gift.
  
  DH and I might go in with friends for a vacuum as a wedding gift but if you registered for something like a $400 Dyson, I'd want 8 people to split the cost of that for a shower.  We might go for just 3-4 couples (or fewer depending on the person) as a wedding gift.
  
  
  

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• quotequeen member

  

  July 2010

  A registry is just a list of suggestions.  Nobody is obligated to buy things from it, so just be gracious at the shower, and then do whatever you want with the items you have no use for.

  Married 10/2/10

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• swissarmymelody

  

  July 2010

  Yes you are being ungrateful. Be thankful that someone is throwing a shower for you and that people are spending their time and money to be with you.

  

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• banana468 member

  

  July 2010

  BTW, FWIW, I remember thinking, "Why aren't people buying this stuff and they're adding to the registry?"
  
  BUT, I use a ton of the stuff that was added on.
  

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• Simply Fated member

  

  July 2010

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_am-being-ungrateful?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:fa707852-423f-40c3-876d-37f35ced446dPost:79ac7dd3-3c26-49d8-9e9e-bd1857e70a60">Am I being ungrateful?</a>:
  [QUOTE]My bridal shower is tomorrow and wedding a month from now.  I have been stalking my registry like crazy because my FI and I have lived together for a while and wanted to register so people knew what we needed and not buy stuff we already have.  Just checked my registry and not even half my gifts are gone and people keep buying us things that arent on our registry (but at the same store so they show up) and have even bought us stuff we already have! The worse is we havent gotten the things we desperately need like luggage and a vacuum! I want to be appreciative of the gifts I do get but its driving me crazy! Anyone else have this happen?
  Posted by skw7972[/QUOTE]
  It does sound like you are being ungrateful. You should be grateful people care enough to get you anything.
  Luggage and vacuum cleaners tend to be pricey. I don't know how much the ones you asked for cost, but I would have most likely crossed those off my list if I were the guest shopping for a shower. As pp said, people tend to save the pricier items for the actual wedding.
  I think you should try focusing less on your shower being a charity event for people to help you buy things you are "desperate" for and more about enjoying the shower and having fun.

  
  

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• lrowe70

  

  July 2010

  I disagree with people saying you are ungrateful. The whole purpose of a registry is to let people know what you need so they don't waste their money on something you're going to toss out. What good are 5 blenders?
  
  As a newlywed who is going through some gift nightmares, I totally understand your irritation with gifts that aren't even on your registry. I wouldn't however be upset that the 2 items you want aren't bought yet. We had about 5 items bought by the time of the shower, but the day of the wedding about half were picked up. A lot of people get wedding gifts as they are driving to the event. Of course if you really are dying for those items either let your mom or someone know, or buy them yourself.
  
  We got about 15 items that weren't on our registry and of them 14 are utter garbage. However we are stuck with the issue of what to do with these items. One very large item in particular has ben a source of stress and fights. It's kinda sad when someone's wedding gift is causing tension on your new marriage. fyi: th gift is a VERY large(and very ugly) furniature item and given by a close family member.
  
  The positive side of all this: After going through gift getting nightmares, for the rest of my life I will only get people things off their registry or money.

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• Goldlie11

  

  July 2010

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_am-being-ungrateful?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:fa707852-423f-40c3-876d-37f35ced446dPost:684d3997-bf6f-4d1a-acd6-7d1f33657050">Re: Am I being ungrateful?</a>:
  [QUOTE]FWIW, I didn't get a lot of pricey stuff for a shower gift.  Our China wasn't purchased until the wedding approached.  For most showers I've attended, the shower gift is much less expensive than the wedding gift. <strong>DH and I might go in with friends for a vacuum as a wedding gift but if you registered for something like a $400 Dyson, I'd want 8 people to split the cost of that for a shower.  We might go for just 3-4 couples (or fewer depending on the person) as a wedding gift.
  <span style="font-weight:normal;" class="Apple-style-span">Posted by banana468[/QUOTE]</span></strong>
  This.<div>
  </div><div>And if push comes to shove, you can use money that you get for the wedding to buy these items. </div><div>
  </div>

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• jenellsrevenge

  

  August 2010

  Also, just because you registered for something at one place doesn;t mean people have to purchase it there. Maybe they are bargain shoppers who know where to get these big ticket items cheaper from other places.

  

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