My first marriage was horrible, he was abusive, I ended up in lots of debt, it's just great that it's over. I moved from his house to my mom's, then she lost her place to foreclosure and we rented a place together. Fast forward and now I'm 39 years old, I've found a wonderful man and we're getting married. I moved out of the house I had with mom to be with him and his children almost a year ago. My family has freaked clean out.
I had to give my mom a time limit on when I would stop paying my share of the rent because even though I've been gone for a year, she still hasn't moved and can't afford the place on her own. I had to put a cut off on there because all of my money was going to her and I couldn't contribute anything to where I was with my FI, he's been extremely patient and understanding.
My grandma and sister decided they couldn't stand my FI from the moment they met him, my mom had too, but she changed her mind after the way he stepped up when I got laid off last year. My grandma is still actively trying to get me to not marry him and my sister is trying to make me feel guilty because I want to have something nice instead of just going downtown.
Everyone is trying to make me feel guilty for "leaving my mom all alone" she's only 61 and perfectly healthy, she doesn't need a caretaker and if she'd even look at any of the houses I've found for her, she'd do a lot better financially. Ironically, my mom is the only family member who's remotely happy for me. I'm just sick of the guilt and apathy and everything else.
They really don't know him very well, even after a year, but they do know that he's been pretty much taking care of me financially for the past year while I was still paying rent at my mom's house and that I'm happy. He's enouraged me to get back into school, start exercising and eating healthier. Why isn't that enough? He's a good man and he's good to me, shouldn't that be what they want? No, they want him to already be established, well he's raising 3 kids on his own, he had some set backs when he was younger including having to drop out of highschool to care for his elderly parents who have since both died, but now he's in school himself going for a BA in business with a supervisory position lined up at his current job. If it was one of them ,I'd be estatic for them.