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Cocktail Hour?

yellowrose314yellowrose314 member
5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
in Wedding Cakes & Food Forum

So, my mother is paying for the majority of the wedding, and she has pretty much vetoed a cocktail hour before dinner. She says that there's no point in paying for a really expensive (and tasty!) dinner and feeding people beforehand. I agree with her, but at the same time I'm worried that our guests will be a little put out by this. Also, we're not having an open bar, but we are providing wine at dinner for each table, and the bar at the venue is pretty reasonably priced with good portions of alcohol per drink. I really wanted to do a signature cocktail, but she's also vetoed that...
I understand that since she's paying for a huge bulk of the wedding (we're only paying for our photographer and honeymoon), that she gets a big say in what goes down (to a certain point...) but I'm really worried my guests aren't going to be happy about these decisions... thoughts?

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Re: Cocktail Hour?

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    jagore08jagore08 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Anniversary First Comment
    As long as you get the mojority of pictures out of the way before the ceremony starts then there's no need for you to have a cocktail hour.  One great way to do this is to have a "first look" with you and your groom before the ceremony.  If you need to take any other you can steal a little time between the ceremony and reception while your guests are getting seated and 20 minutes during the reception while your guests are dancing.

    As for the signature drink, it won't cost anything more (especially since your guests are paying) to come up with a special cocktail.  If the venue has a full service bar then they should have all the necessary ingredients to make yours.
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    Rose MarchRose March member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    It is ok to skip the cocktail hour as log as you don't keep your guests waiting too long between ceremony and reception and a signature drink is not a necessary. If you really want these things, could you offer to pay for the additional cost? 
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    jessicabessicajessicabessica member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited February 2012
    Well, if you are not going right from the ceremony to the reception, you need to have something for your guests in between.  It can be non-alcoholic beverages, cheese and crackers, and a veggie tray, but you should have something for people while they chat and wait for you to finish up photos.  

    Do you mean you want to host a signature cocktail?  Can you offer to pay for that, or shift around other things within the budget to show how you can afford it on the money your mom is spending?
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    yellowrose314yellowrose314 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment

    We have about a 3 hour break between the ceremony and the reception, but the greater majorty of guests at the wedding are family, who are all very close. And knowing them, they'll all probably want to get together at my grandmothers house, who lives in town, and relax at her house for the 3 hours rather than spend 3 hours at the reception eating appy's and drinking coffee...
    Also, I talked to my mother and she said she'd much rather do a cocktail hour after dinner, like midway through the dancing, which I think is a pretty god compromise... I know I get hungry after dancing for a while :).

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    margofritzmargofritz member
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    Advice from a photographer....You could use that long break for pictures with you other close friends and family . More like a portrait session of sorts?? It will provide better pictures in the long run for EVERYONE and will give the photographer ample time to stage great portraits of all your guest. :) Weddings are just as stressful for the photog as they are for the bride.

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    yellowrose314yellowrose314 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    That was my thought too... I have a huge extended family, and I really want to get some pictures with all of them and not just my bridal party, so we decided to have a 3 hour break inbetween. We're also giving our photog a list of the pictures we want with which people, so she won't have to hunt down family members, she can just call the names off the list, click, next... that sort of thing. I'm really hoping people won't be put off with the 3 hour break, but I have a feeling most of the family will be at my grandmothers or my mothers house to hang out before the reception. 
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    margofritzmargofritz member
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    One more tip I know from experience I have a TERRIBLE time remebering names and whose who. LOL you might wan to tell your family members to not be afraid to flag down the photographer. It helps get the photos you want . I always appreciated it .
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