Wedding Etiquette Forum

Should Bridesmaids pay for their own Hair & Makeup?

So I'm getting married next July, and my parents are paying for the whole wedding. My mother specifically told me that she will be paying for my hair and makeup but not for my bridesmaids. Is it my responsibility to pick up the tab for my bridesmaids hair & makeup? (FYI I have seven bridesmaids but no real guidelines as to how they should be doing their hair & makeup).

Thanks for any help!! :)

Re: Should Bridesmaids pay for their own Hair & Makeup?

  • If you're requiring them to have their hair and makeup done then you should pay for it.

    I gave my girls the option, they all decided to have their hair done, and I decided it was a nice gesture to pay for that. If they wanted their makeup done then they paid.
  • If you want their hair and make up professionaly done, then yes - you pay.

    If you don't care if they do their own make and hair, then it doesn't matter.

    You are free to say "I'm getting my hair done here at this time with this price - if you want yours done, too, let me know and I'll  make you an appointment.  If not, no pressure!" 
  • As long as you're not requiring they get either done professionally, nor are you requiring a specific style, you're fine to not pay for it.
  • So long as you do not require them to be at the salon with you and have their hair/makeup done at that salon, you don't have to pay. I always feel if a bride even so much as requires the bridesmaids to be at a certain salon with her, she should pay the bill.

    You know, you could save money from here until July and pay for their hair/makeup out of your own pocket........
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_should-bridesmaids-pay-for-their-own-hair-makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:804e803b-9751-4e6c-82bb-31ce4ffbf065Post:f4f7ad70-80f6-4423-9691-38995652f98f">Re: Should Bridesmaids pay for their own Hair & Makeup?</a>:
    [QUOTE]So long as you do not require them to be at the salon with you and have their hair/makeup done at that salon, you don't have to pay. I always feel if a bride even so much as requires the bridesmaids to be at a certain salon with her, she should pay the bill. You know, you could save money from here until July and pay for their hair/makeup out of your own pocket........
    Posted by itzMS[/QUOTE]

    If you <em>require </em>them to go to <em>any </em>salon you pay.

    As PPs have said, if you aren't requiring them to get it professionally done, you don't have to cover the bill.

    If you're requiring any sort of special style where you know that your bridesmaids could not do it easily themselves (and honestly for me personally that would be anything more complicated than a ponytail...), you pay.

    Now, if you say they can wear their hair however, and one of them chooses to a salon and gets a $75 updo, no, you aren't on the hook for that.
  • Some brides do the passive aggressive "Oh, it's not required, but I'd really love for you to be at Salon XYZ with me on my wedding dayyyyy. You don't HAVEEEE to get your hair done, but I'd really love you thereeeeeeeeeeee"

    Bridesmaids then feel trapped.

    Bottom line, if you want your bridal party at the salon with you...offer to pay for hair & makeup.

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_should-bridesmaids-pay-for-their-own-hair-makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:804e803b-9751-4e6c-82bb-31ce4ffbf065Post:31069518-4c05-4579-858a-3112c0f70557">Re: Should Bridesmaids pay for their own Hair & Makeup?</a>:
    [QUOTE]If you want their hair and make up professionaly done, then yes - you pay. If you don't care if they do their own make and hair, then it doesn't matter. You are free to say "I'm getting my hair done here at this time with this price - if you want yours done, too, let me know and I'll  make you an appointment.  If not, no pressure!" 
    Posted by Joy2611[/QUOTE]

    This is exactley how I did it, two of the four girls, my mom & a sister who isn't in the wedding party (I included the moms & female siblings on offer) are all going.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_should-bridesmaids-pay-for-their-own-hair-makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:804e803b-9751-4e6c-82bb-31ce4ffbf065Post:91f146a3-d441-42ae-9453-b132dcd0ba38">Re: Should Bridesmaids pay for their own Hair & Makeup?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Some brides do the passive aggressive "Oh, it's not required , but I'd really love for you to be at Salon XYZ with me on my wedding dayyyyy. You don't HAVEEEE to get your hair done, but I'd really love you thereeeeeeeeeeee"[/QUOTE]
    Said bride is a passive-aggressive, manipulative twunt.
     
    [QUOTE]Bridesmaids then feel trapped.[/QUOTE]


    Said bridesmaids need to find a backbone.

    [QUOTE] Bottom line, if you want your bridal party at the salon with you...offer to pay for hair & makeup.
    Posted by itzMS[/QUOTE]
    Absolutely!
  • The only requirement your bridesmaids have is to show up in the dress that you chose. If you are requiring anything beyond that, you should cover it.
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  • Honestly, if your parents are covering the whole thing, I don't see how paying for their hair and makeup is a big deal if you want them to get it professionally done.  I don't care one bit how my BM's hair and makeup looks - they're all beautiful and could probably do a better job than a stylist anyway, so we're not doing it.  I don't think I'm even going to do it for myself because my skin breaks out with most makeup lines (including the ones stylists like to use), and every time I go to a salon the hair person talks about how I should color my hair because I'm sort of a redhead but sort of not, and I guess they don't like ambiguity.  For some reason that never fails to piss me off.

    Bottom line - it sounds like you want them to get it done.  Pay for it yourself.  Personally I think you should be paying for your FI's ring, and the gifts to your WP, etc. as well but that's just me.
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  • Well of course we are paying for our own rings and gifts for our bridal party. I am the first of my friends to get married and have never been in a bridal party as an adult so I was unsure whether it was automatically expected for me to pay for their hair, or if it was just something nice to do for them. 
  • Sticky subject.  Where I live the general consensus (whether its right or wrong) is "if you agree to stand for a person, you agree to the cost". 

    Whatever is normally done in your social circle, I guess do that.  But nobody that I know who has gotten married in say, the last 10 years, follows strict etiquette anyway.  Anything goes.  Do what you're comfortable with and that doesn't put you in 2 years of debt. 
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  • See, I don't know anyone who has forced their BMs to get pro hair and makeup.

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_should-bridesmaids-pay-for-their-own-hair-makeup?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:804e803b-9751-4e6c-82bb-31ce4ffbf065Post:d27ed370-8735-4a0b-a555-396da06f9d15">Re: Should Bridesmaids pay for their own Hair & Makeup?</a>:
    [QUOTE]See, I don't know anyone who has forced their BMs to get pro hair and makeup.
    Posted by banana468[/QUOTE]

    You're lucky that you're not pals with M.  All BMs, FG, MOM, FG and my SIL had to have professional hair & makeup or she would have died or something like that so I forked over the cash.  I can't remember what I told her dad but he didn't make a stink so it must have been good ;)
  • I had to in my BFF wedding so I think I'll have the girls pay for their own.
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  • Only if you require them to have a specific style. I told mine that they all just had to have side ponytails, I don't care how it's done, as long it's on the same side. Make up is totally optional. 
  • If neither you nor your parents want to pay for your bridesmaids' hair and makeup, then don't require them to have it done in any particular way or by any particular professional.  I'd limit requirements to just being neat to play it safe.
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