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It stinks in here and I need to let this out

I want to kill FI's dog.

Background:  dog was rescued from pound - was going to be put down - went though 8 different homes and no one would take it.  He rescued it when he was still single.  He babied it, never trained it, and now I'm stuck with it.

Now:  Dog pees in the house all the time.  It's bad enough I inherited FI's house - which was a horrible bachelor pad of a mess; but this dog just won't stop peeing in the house no matter what method we try.

This dog has peed in the same exact spot in the hallway on the hardwood floors for about 2 weeks.  The same upstairs in my office on the rug.  I can't get the smell out!  The wood in the hall has started to buckle (not like it's a nice floor, it's been here since the house was built in the 50s and needs to go anyway).
I tried to hammer the buckle down - and this horrid smell comes out.  So I rip up the hardwood floor - everything  is rotten underneath.  It smells of ammonia and urine so bad in this house right now.  The base floor is even saturated through so that I can see it from the basement.

FI ignores these problems - like he has for the 6 years he's owned this god damn dog.  I get left with the cleaning and problem solving because I'm the only one who cares about the smell and the mess.  FI would live in dog feces if he could.  It's a problem - so he just ignores it like it will go away.

I want to kill this dog.  It is currently in the back yard, alone, which it can't be because it jumps fences and runs away.  I am seriously hoping that happens.  I can't stand all of the pee, the couches are all ripped apart, it sleeps in my bed and rips apart my pillows and breaks anything nice I buy.  I hate it.
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Re: It stinks in here and I need to let this out

  • FI has "promised" to take the dog to the vet for weeks but "doesn't have time" on his days off.

    Obedience school does not work.

    There was a reason why this dog was adopted 8 times then finally sent to be put down.


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  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot Atlanta
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
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    Obedience school absolutely works.  But it requires that the dog owners be dedicated to putting in the effort.

    It sounds like your FI isn't mature enough to be a pet owner yet.  I'd give the dog away to someone more responsible.  
  • You (and your FI) should give the dog to someone more deserving.  It sounds like you're both too lazy to train and/or discipline it, yet you blame the dog for behaving like a dog?  I hope for IT'S sake it jumps the fence and runs to a better home.  You sound like an asshole- no matter how bad my pets have been, I've never wanted to kill them or hope they ran away.
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  • In Response to Re: It stinks in here and I need to let this out:
    In Response to Re: It stinks in here and I need to let this out : If I could figure out how to do this - I would. It's come down to me saying "its the dog or me" on some days. And we've tried everything under the sun so far - it's been 3 years of this for me.  I've gotten him to behave on some issues, but the destruction is just nuts! I have to cut out and replace the floors in both rooms.  We don't have a dime to do this renovation - and we obviously can't afford any more obedience training.  I keep my hopes up every day he comes down with some quick acting dog disease and just dies in his sleep.  And I'm an animal lover - had two dogs, three cats, rabbits, snakes, hamsters, fish all my life! go figure.
    Posted by M&R7111
    Quoting this so you don't pretend you're not a jerk.
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  • In Response to Re: It stinks in here and I need to let this out:
    If a child misbehaves, do you blame the child, or do you blame the parents for not disciplining the child? Same with the dog. Try dog obedience school. Also, maybe the dog is peeing everywhere because you aren't taking it out for a walk enough. Maybe it has a medical problem that causes it to not be able to empty or control it's bladder. 
    Posted by iamsteph

    This exactly.  At the core of it owning a dog is very similar to taking care of a kid. 
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  • In Response to Re: It stinks in here and I need to let this out:
    I'm going through a slightly similar situation right now. I wanted to adopt a second cat. My FI picks out this cute little black kitten. Didn't think to read his papers before he got him(I'm the one of researches things, and asks questions)... So we get this hyper, disobedient kitten that peed everywhere. Took him to the vet. he's not even really a kitten(at least 6 months old, papers we got said 3 mnths old) The doctor treated him for Urinary Tract Infection which almost worked. Now he just decides he'd rather pee on my hallway carpet. I RENT! I could kill this cat. FI swore at first he couldnt smell it, and I'm pretty sure he didn't even believe me this was happening. Now that he witnessed it, we both agreed this guy has got to go. Back to the central point... Have you discussed your opinion of the dog, and house, with FI? It's very possible that it's a medical problem. Push your man to take him to the vet. Guilt trip him even. If he loves the dog so much he won't want to suffer being sick anymore. p.s. sorry this was so long. I suppose I needed to get that off of my chest myself
    Posted by Tula214
    The dog has made progress - we finally got it to be out of the crate when we were not home.  It had wayyyy too much aggression and energy when it was pent up all day.
    But recently it started peeing.  I'm assuming it marked in one spot - then keeps marking in that spot because his odor is still there.

    At any rate - FI is taking him to the vet Monday.  Hopefully it is an infection and the problem is solved.

    Regardless, this house is way too small for the dog to be in all day. There are so many other issues that are here and FI never addressed them for the years he has had the dog.   We can't even go away because people won't watch it.  I have tried to train the dog myself, but FI get's mad when I'm "too hard on him" because "he can't help it" .

    I am stuck with the dog until it dies I guess.  This is hard because the dog takes up 99.9% of our time.  I want to have kids and I don't know how I can take care a kid wtih a dog of this size and who is this destructive at the same time.  It's depressing.
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  • In Response to Re: It stinks in here and I need to let this out:
    In Response to Re: It stinks in here and I need to let this out : This exactly.  At the core of it owning a dog is very similar to taking care of a kid. 
    Posted by jmkes
    Yes, only this is not my kid.

    I don't like other people's kids.  I can't tolerate them in restaurants when they are screaming.  Same here - I can't stand his dog.

    Oh, and I will never love my pets as much as I would love my kids.
    Pets are here for me, for my personal interests.
    I would give my life for my children, on the other hand.  My life exists for them.
    Big difference.
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  • In Response to Re: It stinks in here and I need to let this out:
    In Response to Re: It stinks in here and I need to let this out : The dog has made progress - we finally got it to be out of the crate when we were not home.  It had wayyyy too much aggression and energy when it was pent up all day. But recently it started peeing.  I'm assuming it marked in one spot - then keeps marking in that spot because his odor is still there. At any rate - FI is taking him to the vet Monday.  Hopefully it is an infection and the problem is solved. Regardless, this house is way too small for the dog to be in all day. There are so many other issues that are here and FI never addressed them for the years he has had the dog.   We can't even go away because people won't watch it.  I have tried to train the dog myself, but FI get's mad when I'm "too hard on him" because "he can't help it" . I am stuck with the dog until it dies I guess.  This is hard because the dog takes up 99.9% of our time.  I want to have kidsand I don't know how I can take care a kid wtih a dog of this size and who is this destructive at the same time.  It's depressing.
    Posted by M&R7111
    You don't need kids if you can't take care of you dog.  You really don't need one if you hope your dog dies.  Do you not understand kids break things and make messes too?  I hope you and your FI do some SERIOUS growing up before you even think about kids.
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  • That's ridiculous. Yes, the dog peeing in the house sucks. But training your dog NOT to do that is part of your responsibility as a pet owner. By choosing to be with your FI, you've chosen to be with the dog too, like it or not. You either need to step up and work on the dog more, or let your FI know that this is a serious breaking point for you. Wishing the dog dead does nothing more than make you sound like a total jackass

  • edited October 2010
    You do realize that this could be a medical problem?  And if it's an infection, i feel really sorry for your dog, who has been neglected and left to suffer because neither of you want to deal with it.  
    One of my best friends lost her dog this weekend.  She is crushed.  My heart hurts for her.  It's sad that this dog won't be missed when 'it' passes on.  
    I never understand when people expect an animal to act like a human.  It's a dog.  If you want it to act a certain way, you need to teach it to do so.  
    I feel like you're the kinda person who kicks dogs.  I judge.
    ETA:  and people wonder why the adoption process for an animal is so involved.  It is to attempt to not place animals in homes like this.  
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  • In Response to Re: It stinks in here and I need to let this out:
    You do realize that this could be a medical problem?  And if it's an infection, i feel really sorry for your dog, who has been neglected and left to suffer because neither of you want to deal with it.   One of my best friends lost her dog this weekend.  She is crushed.  My heart hurts for her.  It's sad that this dog won't be missed when 'it' passes on.   I never understand when people expect an animal to act like a human.  It's a dog.  If you want it to act a certain way, you need to teach it to do so.   I feel like you're the kinda person who kicks dogs.  I judge. ETA:  and people wonder why the adoption process for an animal is so involved.  It is to attempt to not place animals in homes like this.  
    Posted by kellyjellybelly


    I thought I was a psycho because every I'm always online researching any odd behaviors my cat has, and medical problems. I guess it's better than neglecting it. With my bad cat, I've spent so much money, in which I don't have, and so many hours trying to fix this. He's really the sweetest animal. More loveable than any other pet I've ever had. Unforetunetely, his last owners LET him urinate wherever he wanted....  My lack of money(curse this economy) is the reason I have to give up on my baby.

    Also, I didn't reading a lot of the posts after mine, both of you waited way too long  to fix the problem. Please, for the dog's sake, take him to the vet, and do whatever you need for him.
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  • If you cat is peeing outside of the littler box, there is an issue - whether behavioral or physical.  I have one who does - it is a behavioral reaction to another over-dominant male in the house.  I am working on it, but it takes time.  Basically, I have to separate them.
    A 6 month old kitten is not too old to retrain.  If he is urinating in the same place all the time, it is because he still smells the urine there.  Since you've done research, I assume you already know this.
    I'm guessing since you have 'given up' you have returned him to wherever you adopted him from as most places where you can adopt animals from have this stipulation in the contract you sign.
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  • vicki0508vicki0508
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    edited October 2010
    I also have a cat that used to pee everywhere.  After a few trips to the vet, found out he needs to be on a special prescription food to make his urine more acidic.  Don't assume one trip to the vet can fix something.

    Edit: grammar
  • edited October 2010
    Dogs tend to urinate in places that they have in the past, so try cleaning it with Nature's Miracle or something that will truly get all the smell out. And start training him to go outside. Put him on a leash and when he goes to the bathroom, give lots of praise and treats.

    As for the ripping things apart, try Grannicks bitter apple spray and spray it on items the dog usually rips up. It makes the items taste bitter to the dogs and they will be less likely to rip it up. Does he have enough chew toys that he can play with? Kongs, Nylabones?

    Is the dog neutered? If not, you definitely should consider it.

    It sounds like the dog is bored and needs exercise. Does he get daily walks? That could be the core of many of his problems. But if you're against training this poor dog, then you can't expect the problems to go away.
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  • Seriously you and your FI don't deserve to have a dog if you can't take the time to train it.  Keep it in a crate when you're gone.  Our dog went through a phase where he would poop in the house when we would leave him, so now we always put him in his crate when we leave.  Simple solution. 

    Why don't you look up dog parks in the area and take him there to get his energy out.  You would be amazed at how much an hour in the dog park can tire a dog out.  Seriously, I have lost all respect I have for you after you said that you hope he runs away, and worse when you said you hope he gets a dog disease and dies.  What if someone said that about you?
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  • Totally ignorant on this because I've never had a dog. But just from the clean-up side of things, could you put down plastic sheeting on those two spots until your figure this out? You know, like the pads you put in a little kid's bed before he learns how to not wet the bed at night.At least then you wouldn't accumulate more damage to your floors.
  • Ummm...okay?

    It's going to be your dog pretty soon, miss thang, so you better figure this little tid bit out with your FI. Geeze...
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  • redheadfsuredheadfsu
    2500 Comments
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    edited October 2010
    Um, don't be mad at the dog. Be mad at your FI. He is the bad guy, not the dog. Poor dog. Please take the time to train him and talk to the vet several times. Your FI should be left outside, not the dog.

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  • I would seriously reconsider the whole kids thing, at least with your FI.  If you can't agree on dog training methods, I'd hate to see the two of you trying to agree on parenting issues.
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  • In Response to Re: It stinks in here and I need to let this out:
    In Response to Re: It stinks in here and I need to let this out : If I could figure out how to do this - I would. It's come down to me saying "its the dog or me" on some days. And we've tried everything under the sun so far - it's been 3 years of this for me.  I've gotten him to behave on some issues, but the destruction is just nuts! I have to cut out and replace the floors in both rooms.  We don't have a dime to do this renovation - and we obviously can't afford any more obedience training.  I keep my hopes up every day he comes down with some quick acting dog disease and just dies in his sleep.  And I'm an animal lover - had two dogs, three cats, rabbits, snakes, hamsters, fish all my life! go figure.
    Posted by M&R7111
    No, you're not. No true animal lover would hope that a perfectly innocent animal dies.
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  • F&HF&H
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    How about you don't let him have free reign of the house. Hold him on a leash or put him in the crate, only letting him out for a walk. And definitely put him in a crate at night. Easy. :)
  • What about putting one of those puppy pads over the spots he pees?  That will at least contain the mess if he goes inside.

    I had a puppy with congenital heart failure who peed in the house all of the time.  He had fluid congestion due to his HF, and the only way his body could handle it was to pee it out.  Peeing inside can indicate a really serious medical problem.

    Ditto on the walks.  I know you don't really care for the dog, but it does deserve to be exercised.  Who knows, you may even like it once it has a chance to get some aggression out.

    Good luck!
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  • In Response to Re: It stinks in here and I need to let this out:
    I would seriously reconsider the whole kids thing, at least with your FI.  If you can't agree on dog training methods, I'd hate to see the two of you trying to agree on parenting issues.
    Posted by tidetravel
    A-freaking-men.  I've heard of loads of couples who get a pet first and consider it a warm-up for how they're going to handle their children.  (One of my BMs said explicitly that they were "going to practice on a puppy first".)  If the dog isn't going to work out, I beg you, down on my knees, not to have children.  You can't just return them to the pound if they don't work out.
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  • I haven't read all of the responses yet, but your fiance really needs to take the time to learn about dogs and their behavior and that yes, you need to be strict with them. The dog is peeing in the same spot all the time because the odor is there, you need to use a cleaner with an enzyme to get the odor out. I know replacing the floors sucks, but it actually might help you, because he won't be able to find his potty spot anymore. You need to keep an eye on the dog at all times, keep him attached to your hip, if he makes a move to pee, give him whatever your "no" sound is (we use Uh-uh! and it actually works quite well), catching him in the act of peeing and making him stop mid-pee (scare him with loud noises) will teach him he's not supposed to do it there. If you don't catch him doing it, there is no way to teach him not to make the mess that he just made. Take him outside frequently and stay outside until he pees and when he does, he gets praise and treats. Try restricting his freedom, when we got our puppy, she originally wasn't allowed outside of the sunroom, where the backdoor is. When she mastered the sunroom, we expanded her area to the kitchen and sunroom, and so on, the whole point was to teach her how to find her way to the back door. Does he have a lot of toys? Our dog doesn't chew on furniture etc. because 1) we have lots of toys, 2) when she makes a move for something we don't want her to destroy she gets an uh-uh to know that she's not supposed to have it, and 3) lots and lots of exercise. A dog that is bored will be destructive. Ellie goes for two short walks a day (they get longer as she gets older) and we take her to the local dog park a few times a week, plus lots of play time. (At least, she hasn't been destructive thus far anyway...)

    It's not too late to train him, it's really not, but you'll have to put a lot of energy into it and watch the dog like a hawk, and your fi will have to be 100% on board with it, you both need to be.

    On another note, my friend once had a dog, Steve, who was very cute but would constantly pee inside. She had gotten him from a friend who had gotten him from abusive owners. When my friend gave him away, the new owner took him to the vet and discovered the poor dog had brain damage from the abuse, and would never stop peeing in the house. So, hopefully his vet visit on Monday will tell you guys something, I'd recommend going with your fi if you can so that you ask the questions you think need to be asked and all of the answers are told first-hand to you.
  • lauralaurlauralaur
    Ninth Anniversary 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
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    edited October 2010
    A note about the puppy pads: you need to teach the dog to pee on them. I put them down once for my puppy and all she did was shred them and pee on the floor. When I saw the mess she had made I thought "well duh lauralaur, you shoulda seen that one coming."

    OK one more and then I'm done. Another note about the crates, dogs really aren't supposed to be crated over age 2 (or so I've been told). You should invest in a crate, but make sure he's not in there for more than four hours at a time, he will need to regain freedom around the house, however, or he will think of the crate as his domain and not the house. Dogs instictively mess away from their "nest," so if he does not think of the house as his nest, he will pee anywhere in the house that he does not think of as his.
  • I actually think I might be sick to my stomach, reading that you hope your dog gets some "dog disease, or runs away".
    My puggle is bad sometimes, pees in the house.. VERY rarely does she do that but no matter how bad and menacing she can be, she's my little animal, who depends on ME to take care of her, and to make sure she doesn't DIE.

    Please for the love of the dog, get up off the couch and take it for a walk, show that you have SOME compassion!!!!!

    I'm going to go hug my dog now.
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  • Kennel the dog when you can't supervise.
     Take it out every 30 minutes when you are home to let it pee.
    POSTIVE REINFORCMENT TRAINING.

    And the tone of your post aggravates me a lot.
     If you FI got rid of the dog, I would think he's a jerk. He made a committment. You should respect that considering he's going to be making a rather big on to you, right?
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  • edited October 2010
    holy fuucking crap. you seem like a terrible person. I can not even go into all your points right now because I am SO angry.

    All you need to know is my husband and I adopted a wonderful dog who had been abused his whole life (8 plus years) who has accidents because of his stress and upbringing. God's creatures deserve love and understanding, not death wishes and horrible people like you. Fuuck that.
  • So instead of getting off your lazy asses and letting the dog out a few times a day, or god forbid take it for a walk, you would rather get rid of it?

    Makes sense.

    The only reason a dog pees in the house is because it is either sick, or no one is letting it out.

    I hope your dog gets diarrhea in your bed.

    You should be ashamed of yourself.  I wonder if your FI knows what a gem he has got in you.  I really hope you dont have kids cause they pee/poop/puke everywhere too.

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  • AND you are NOT an animal lover if you want his dog to die.
     How can you not love/care about something your FI loves so much? Selfish much?

    If my FI had said this or treated my pets this way, we would not have gotten married. Does your FI know that you feel this way about his beloved pet?
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