Assigning roles outside the wedding party

KSParker2012 · February 2012

What all do I need to ask people to do besides being in my bridal party? I know I need a guest book attendant, and ushers, but is there anything else? Also how many ushers do I need for 125 person wedding?

Finally-on the knot checklist it says candle lighters. I will have candles at the wedding but I'm not really sure what that role is? Can't they just be lit before people get there?

Thanks for the help!

meganb1977 · February 2012

You don't need a guest book attendant. As far as candle lighters and ushers, you might want to check with the coordinator at your venue to see what has worked well in the past, but you may not need those either. Groomsmen can double as escorts if you want someone to walk the moms and grandmas to their seats.

kateguess22 · February 2012

Traditionally, it's 50 guests per usher. So in your case, two ushers would follow tradition.

You do not need to assign any jobs outside of your bridal party. A guest book attendant is unnessessary. However, if you would like, you could assign a greeter for your reception, a Mistress of Ceremonies, MC for your reception, personal attendant, readers, and a ring bearer.

Candle lighters come up to light the candles before the mother of the bride is seated. They are usually pre-teens (9 to 12) and this is unnessessary. If it's not a tradition in your church then you can certainly skip it.

kmmssg · February 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_assigning-roles-outside-wedding-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:9a3dbe76-a12e-47f8-88ef-a5b4e4749651Post:0aa21140-ce4e-49ab-8566-841c277690a3">Re: Assigning roles outside the wedding party</a>:
[QUOTE]Traditionally, it's 50 guests per usher. So in your case, two ushers would follow tradition. You do not need to assign any jobs outside of your bridal party. A guest book attendant is unnessessary. However, if you would like, you could assign a<strong> greeter for your reception, a Mistress of Ceremonies, MC for your reception, personal attendant,</strong> readers, and a ring bearer. Candle lighters come up to light the candles before the mother of the bride is seated. They are usually pre-teens (9 to 12) and this is unnessessary. If it's not a tradition in your church then you can certainly skip it.
Posted by kateguess22[/QUOTE]

PLEASE do not assign the bold "duties". They are crap jobs and totally unnecessary. While Mistress of Ceremonies isn't well known on the knot, I did that once and worked every bit as hard as the WC I hired for my daughter's wedding. The DJ will MC anything you need, and personal attendant is just one way to say "you didn't make the cut for bridemaid, but you get to be my gopher and get me stuff and keep me happy on my wedding day while I hang out with m maids."

TiffannieF · February 2012

Candle lighters usually go to the people who didn't make the BM cut. A pretty song will play and they come in and light the candles. I wouldn't do that. I also don't think you need a guest book attendant. I suggest 2 ushers for 125, however it is not necessary to have ushers. The ushers can direct people to the guest book if they ask. I highly suggest having a DOC. If a friend volunteers and you trust them they can do it other wise hiring one will be some of your best money invested.

Simply Fated · February 2012

You don't need a guest book attendant. No one needs one of those. You don't really need any of those jobs assigned to anyone.

toothpastechica · February 2012

We are having my FI's half sisters usher (late teens), they are thrilled because they totally were not expecting to get to be part of the wedding (the will be coming to make up and getting ready with the bridesmaids and get the same matching flowers for thier hair). We are having 3 ushers for 130 people, but the ceremony site is going to be quite complicated...otherwise we would have had none.

I do suggest asking someone or hiring someone to MC....we are not havng a DJ so an MC is a must and I would really rather it be someone known to us then just a vendor, so we are planning on asking a friend.

The other 'jobs' mentioned really don't need to be filled, and if you want someone to keep an eye on your guestbook now and then and greet people at the reception get a day of coordinator, dont make your friends or family do long boring jobs instead of getting to enjoy your reception.

And honestly...wth is the deal with personal attendents...your gettng married not becoming the queen with your own servents....Last I checked between you and if you need help getting ready -your bridesmaids and/or mother, all capable people....you shouldnt need any slaves to help you get ready.

bburkel · February 2012

I have a nephew who is always the life of the party, so we've assigned him the role of "Master of Awesomeness". He's going to usher, if needed, but is essentially there to have a good time and encourage others to do the same.
And, if my fiance gets his way, he will also be wearing a Storm Trooper costume for part of the evening's activities. All in good fun.

whitney37354 · February 2012

I've only been to one wedding with no guest book attendant or ushers, & I thought It odd at the time. However, we all knew to sign the book & find a seat, so it all worked out.

Some of us want to "honor" as many people as we can by giving them a part in our big day, but we don't want 15 bridesmaids standing at the altar with us. Having a guestbook attendant, someone to hand out programs, etc. is a way to do that.

Where I live, most of the time the groomsmen/usher/candle lighter are the same people. However, sometimes the ushers/candle lighters are separate from the groomsmen.

Assigning roles outside the wedding party

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