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Should I be worried (maybe a vent)...Long

JudeG20JudeG20 member
First Anniversary First Comment
in Florida-South Florida
Hi Ladies,

So a few things have been going on that are bothering me.

 First,  someone facebooked me that they wont be able to make it to the wedding. I got a little nervous and started to think ...what if we are paying all this money and people don't go. I think I am probably stress and lately I have been only thinking about the negative. Did anyone feel this way or am i going crazy??

The other thing is I am not a materialistic person, but my  FMIL got us our wedding gift and I know I am going to sound ungrateful, but she got us a quesadilla maker. It wasnt' even on my registry.  Even FI was confused about it. I just thought since she was Fi's mom she would get us something a little better. especially since she has not helped us out at all with the wedding. I thought maybe she was going through a hard financial time, but she just bought her self a new TV and I am not even going to mention the price of her dress for the wedding. Am I being unreasonable to get upset?

And last, My Aunt is one of my BM. Recently one of my GMs dropped out since he is in the military and will be leaving soon to japan he did not want to risk not being here for the wedding. We completely understand. So she was left without someone to walk down the aisle with. I thought ok we will just have 2 BMs walk with one of our GMs and my Mother and Aunt both had a fit. She even wanted to drop out. Which hurts me. My aunt and I are almost the same age and we grow up together. It is important for me to have her be part of such an important day. Then they came up with the Idea of having one of her friends walk with her I said no I don't know who he is... Can you believe they had the nerve to say I was controlling...Am I being controlling?

Sorry its long I just need to get it off my chest!
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Re: Should I be worried (maybe a vent)...Long

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    quiggels219quiggels219
    First Comment
    I don't think you're over reacting about your aunt - I can't believe she asked to have someone else walk her down the aiilse! We have more girls than guys (one of fi groomsmen is a girl and I chose one more person than him) and no one has complained about having one guy walk two girls ( and the guys love the idea). I would tell her no, shell walk with who you say and that's the end of it. I have also had the moment freak out no one is going to come but then I remind myself how silly that is and how I Sony want everyone to show honestly cause then well be a little over budget :) As for the gift - it sucks and is weird but unfortunatly it's something you have to say thank you for and moe on from. Maybe throw a cinco de mayo party next yr and make some happy memories with your new quesadilla maker :)
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    NMustang2427NMustang2427 member
    First Comment
    I agree with quiggles, Your aunt shouldn't be freaking out about sharing a GM to walk down the aisle with. I think its absurd to ask for someone you don't know to have him walk her down. It's not her wedding, it's yours.. I think that she isn't thinking about you, she is thinking about herself and how she would appear to everyone else.

    As far as you FMIL, I could see my FMIL doing something like that too. All I can say is that it isn't very fair and I agree with you but all you can do about it, is say thank you and forget about it. I think she would get offended if you FI talked to her about it but thats up to you.. If you do confront her about it, I would make it your FI's job.. but I don't think that's neccesary.

    I am also freaking out about who's coming and who's not since I'm having a destination wedding in FL. But all I can do it let it go. I can't control who's coming and who's not. Even though my dad is being negative about the whole thing and I cconstantly have people like my grandma telling me not to have it in FL because no one will come and I won't get any money since I'm greek and my family is huge. I just say oh well.. it is what it is lol I will enjoy my day with the people that come and they will be the people I care about the most.. HTH Cheer up!! You're going to be marrying your best friend and your day will be beautiful no matter who is there, as long as it's the 2 of you, it wont matter whos there.. :-)
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    JustinandLeeannJustinandLeeann member
    First Comment
    Is your aunt the only BM? Have another bridesmaid go it alone or sit them down and give them some options. We have three BM and 2 GM so I sat down the bridesmaids and said my college roomate and FSIL can walk with one groomsman together and my MOH (my sister) can walk with the other, my MOH and FSIL can walk double or my sister can go it alone. Luckily they've been pretty go with the flow (except my sister) so it wasn't too big of an issue. Hopefully one of your bridesmaids will say she'll walk down the isle alone instead.
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    XxMari518xXXxMari518xX
    First Comment
    Anyways ... I agree with everyone SUPER RANDOM but you still need to laugh it off.  Maybe make a Quesadilla Sunday tradition? 

    It's a little harsh saying it's either my way or the highway, but possibly just explaining this happens all the time.  OR... have the girls only walk with the guys on the way out?

    ** in addition, vent it out!  This is a place where we lend a sympathetic ear! 
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    Danny&Mel2003Danny&Mel2003 member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    IMO your aunt is way out of line ... Your wedding your decision ... You want her to walk alone or with another gm an bm your call ... She either respects or the alternative Fmil it is an untraditional gift I suppose but like someone else said you can make quesadilla Sunday have little fun with it.
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    JudeG20JudeG20 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    Thanks ladies for the advice. You girls honestly make me feel so much better!
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    PhiSigFlyPhiSigFly
    First Anniversary First Comment
    I agree with PP on the issue of your aunt and being worried that no one will come.

    However, I'd return the quesdilla maker :)
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