My bridesmaid sent me an e-mail saying she hates my dress.

amlaplante · January 2010

Your dress is beautiful and timeless! Look at that amazing beading! This woman sounds like a nut. Just write her back and simply say, "I appreciate your concern. However, I love the gown I have chosen and it's what I will be walking down the aisle in." No need to create a bigger problem than it already is. I know how much you you must really want to give this woman a piece of your mind, but unfortunately it will probably be better if you take the high road. By the way, I'm sure she will probably be the only person that doesn't like your dress. It is simply beautiful.

lewisc2002 · January 2010

i'm glad you vented on here and people are backing you up - including me! i have no idea what i would do in your shoes - i think the best approach is your planned one: killing her with kindness. I just worry about dealing with her on your wedding day - hopefully she isn't one to roll her eyes and ruin your pictures. You may also have problems with her refusing to buy a BM dress if she finds it too "hideous." I guess my point is that you have to draw the line somewhere - just do it before it's too late!

rodeo417 · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bridesmaid-sent-e-mail-saying-she-hates-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:4cffae61-03fe-4f84-8455-b19e1854352ePost:b00cb382-1663-497d-9858-adb51c10361d">Re: My bridesmaid sent me an e-mail saying she hates my dress.</a>:
[QUOTE]Despite the fact that kicking a bridesmaid out of the wedding is almost never justified, thisbitch deserves it. She's a relative though so I guess you can't do that. Sad, isn't it? The poster that suggested sending the email to the FILs may have a good idea though. I love the dress and I'm not usually a fan of lacy dresses. You're on the slim side so I think you will carry it beautifly
Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]

exactly what this Poster said!!! i love that dress!! if my hips were smaller i would order it asap... kick the bridemaid to the curb!

SarahSmile23 · January 2010

first of all, i think your dress is gorgeous.

second of all, people like her WANT a reaction. don't give her something to create drama with. instead, i'd send her one of those obnoxious emails that says something like, "gosh, i'm sorry you feel that way! i love my dress and hope one day you can love it too. have a great day!" she'll be so annoyed that her opinion meant so very little to you AND you aren't giving her anything she can use to make you look bad.

good luck!

notquiteblushing · January 2010

Don't create more drama. Just write back and say "thank you for your opinion but I am more than happy with my dress."

End of story. Sorry you got stuck with a psycho. Love the dress.

dianenjnj · January 2010

i've got to disagree with the posters who say to answer her email and "thank her" this chick has got to be humiliated...forward the email to everyone!

midnite007x · January 2010

i would just respond with "i love my dress and i am not changing it, since you hate and think 20 years from now picture will be awful, then it maybe you should reconsider being a bridesmaid since you will have to take pictures with me in the dress"

SarahSmile23 · January 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bridesmaid-sent-e-mail-saying-she-hates-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:4cffae61-03fe-4f84-8455-b19e1854352ePost:15df33b5-c07e-48a2-91fa-48baac80fceb">Re: My bridesmaid sent me an e-mail saying she hates my dress.</a>:
[QUOTE]i've got to disagree with the posters who say to answer her email and "thank her" this chick has got to be humiliated...forward the email to everyone!
Posted by dianenjnj[/QUOTE]

or she can let it go.

brit_bell90 · January 2010

It sounds like she's jealous. That dress is phenomenal, even I'm jealous! lol

robandal · January 2010

Screw her! don't even give her a response! If it were me I would ask her to step down as a bridesmaid, since she isn't the kind of person I would want to surround myself with.

p.s. your dress is beautiful! lace is amazing.

StephBow · January 2010

What is it about getting engaged that makes everyone think they can tell us their opinions? I mean, it is a diamond ring not a sign that says, "What do you think?"

Your dress is beautiful. But, here's the deal, even if twas a gold pimp suit with HITCH THIS bedazzled on the butt, if you already bought it, your bridesmaids better tell you that you are a timeless beauty.

As for her... I would want to kick her out, but I wouldn't. It would just make your life all weird at reunions and holidays. Not worth it. However, I would limit my interaction with her as much as possible about wedding info, and I would take everything she says with a big ol' grain of salt.

Family... gotta love 'em!

Good luck! Happy Wedding!

e_uecker · January 2010

Sounds like she could be someone who wants the spot light and tries to tear down people who are in it. Don't let her negativity ruin your day!

rinsly · January 2010

obviously this is why you are picking out the maid's dresses... having a bm with taste so horrible that she thinks a georgeous dress like that is ugly it would be scary to see what she came up with if she was allowed to shop for herself!

ElayneJC · January 2010

I have to be honest - I was totally ready to hate your dress. I have to say though, it is absolutely stunning and classic and at your height and weight you're going to look just like a model in it. Here is what I would caution - on your wedding day, you may have jitters, you may be very emotional, and what I would worry about, is having someone like that around you while you are getting ready to walk down the aisle. You're going to want that before time to be serene and full of love and joy. I guess if you don't feel you can just kick her out, I'd say this - ignore the email entirely. If she has the bad taste to bring it up again, ugh, I just don't know.

sborhani84 · January 2010

what an inconsiderate and mean thing to say. i think your dress is gorgeous. at first i was going for a sleek a line dress but guess what, I'M GETTING LACE!

FORGET SHE EVER SAID THAT. have fun at your wedding!

future-mrs · January 2010

Being a hot head like myself as well, part of me says tell that b**** she can kiss your you-know-what but beings she's family, you unfortunately have to put up with her forever. :-P So I'd go with the high road like other have mentioned. I second the jealousy comments as well, it sounds like she's jealous for whatever reason (who knows with people like that.) If you e-mail her back and thank her, etc. it will probably annoy her the most (she would FEED off of more drama, I'm sure.)

Sorry you have to deal with someone like that and GL!

Oh and your dress is absolutely beautiful, lace is completely classic and timeless, nice choice! And at that weight/height, you're going to look absolutely stunning.

cinderblock23 · January 2010

I think the dress is absolutely gorgeous. The lace is beautiful and I love the back!
Just ignore her, she's probably just jealous.

skippylouwho · January 2010

"Well bless your heart..." I wish I could find it now but I read a list of what different southern expressions meand "...bless your heart" was one of them - I'm guessing it's a kinder way of saying "..kiss my ...". When I read the list I loved the definitions and wanted to remebmer them so I could use them but alas I did not.

MollySm · January 2010

I think that is a gorgeous dress! I love it!

Jdomanus_9200429 · January 2010

This girls on crack! Get the pipe away from here and lock her up in rehab .... hopefully until you return from your honeymoon. She sucks and I agree with her getting the boot although that might make it worse BUT she might be a downer on your special day. If your FI can be straight up with his brother maybe he can reign her in keep her away from everyone else in the party. Or maybe you have a straight talking BM that can set her straight ... not eluding to anything you've said but just SHE feels she is being XYZ. Good luck!

splint00 · January 2010

I would either be ridiculously nice to her or just completely ignore the nasty email. You have to take the high road on this one since she's family, unfortunate as the case may be. It's upsetting to hear something like that but you will look fantastic. I get a kick out of being overly nice to people who are being rude, they just don't know what to do with it

snoangel79 · January 2010

The dress is very pretty. I'd actually tell her, "sorry you can't be in the wedding, your attitude is ugly, and I don't need the bs in my life" seriously if she is that rude why would you want her in your life. Life is short. I'm seriously not inviting certain people and a friend that I thought was a good friend (she's a flake about everything, I asked her a while back to be in my wedding before I got engaged and you know what absolutly not! She'd be a horrible bm!
If you absolutely have to have her in the wedding. You should forward her email to all of your "good" friends and hope that one of them "accidentally" spills their red wine on her at the reception.

suzieharris · January 2010

Your Dress is Beautiful!!! Are we still in High School or what? Your BM is jeeeeaaalous!

FashionFauxPas · January 2010

agreed- the dress is stunning.

If she's as nasty as she sounds, she's probably just saying what she said b/c she doesn't want you to outshine her, and what she looked like on her wedding day.
I would write back and say something like:
"Hi. Thanks for your honesty- I appreciate your opinion.
I still love the dress, and I think it will be perfect my my wedding.
Cheers!"

Good luck!

kitnamy · February 2010

Wow, that dress is stunning and I'm sure you're going to look lovely in it! I'm going to have to agree with everyone here- kill her with kindness.

TopazAngel · April 2010

Well, I wouldn't exacerbate the drama more than you have to. Tell her you appreciate her honesty but did she consider saying something before you bought it? And that you thought about what she said, but you still stand by your choice.

If she persists, be frank. She doesn't have to wear it. The wedding-party thing is obviously stressing her out and maybe she doesn't want to be in it anymore?

lol.

khornack · April 2010

The dress is gorgous. She's crazy. But you already know that. I would be hurt if one of bridesmaids said that to me.

Ignore her. She's a drama queen and just wants attention. She can go screw herself.

My bridesmaid sent me an e-mail saying she hates my dress.

Re: My bridesmaid sent me an e-mail saying she hates my dress.

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