Should I throw my bf a college grad party if his parents won't?

dayma09 · August 2012

My boyfriend of 2 years graduates this winter. He never got a high school grad party and says he doesn't think his parents would throw a college one either. I've hinted at me throwing a "surprise" party for him inviting some friends and both of our families that haven't met yet. He's super close to mine and said he'd want them there. I live in a townhouse with 3 other girls off campus, but the party would be after finals while people are gone for break. Assuming they say it's ok to have the party there, I'm worried that his parents, especially mom, will feel offended or weird that I threw it even if she wasn't planning to. He said I have an engagement ring coming after his graduation and we're serious, but I'm worried that his family will be offended in some way, or if that's not the place to have the families meet. The thing is, he's close to my family too and wants them there and wants a party, and if we're getting engaged soon they're going to have to meet sooner than later. Any thoughts?

Sjmiller418 · August 2012

I would talk to his mom about what your thinking, just send her an email or a phone call just introducing your idea of throwing him a grad party and that you wanted to maybe meet up and talk to her about some things about it. That way if she wants to be involved she can and maybe his family just doesn't realize that it is something he would want because I know my parents wouldn't unless I told them.

And I think a small grad party is just fine of a time to have your parents meet each other. Its a casual event where they can mingle as they please.

LauraT25 · August 2012

Grad parties aren't really a thing for most people I know, so I don't think it's weird that his parents aren't throwing him one. I would give his mom a heads-up, like PP suggested, so that she can be involved if she wants to, but you should be okay with it if she just wants to be a guest. It seems like a fine time for your families to meet, IMO.

kmd0501 · September 2012

When my fiance went to paramedic school, his parents got upset because he wouldn't be able to contribute HIS time and money to THEM anymore and made several statements about him being "better than them" becuase now he "dated someone that graduted college". Yea...I couldn't believe those words left his mothers mouth...but they did. I helped him finance school and absolutely I threw him the biggest bestest grad party ever! My fiance also did not graduate high school, he recieved his GED at 16 so he could help out financially at home so he never had grad parties or prom. I made his grad party a "black tie" theme and all of our friends wore bow ties and old prom dresses and everyone took pictures with the all important "prom pose and back drop". It was a great time and he still talks about it.

Should I throw my bf a college grad party if his parents won't?

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