Snarky Brides

where in the f...

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Re: where in the f...

  • K ByteK Byte member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    edited February 2012
    I don't have kids and my friends kids are mostly babies so I'm not familiar with kids stuff now, but do they really not keep score at kids sports events anymore? And if so why are there always stories of parents being so competitive at their kids games? I just don't get it -- on both counts -- if there's no keeping score, kids can't improve their games and try harder to win the next time -- and the parents who go apeshit at kids little league or soccer games or whatever are just effing crazy and living through their kids. And THAT won't screw the kids up or anything, not at all ...
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  • Ape shiit parents can be banned from the games.  Its an easy solution

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  • edited February 2012
    I will put this much into the bullying issue: bullying 'looks' very different now because of the Internet. Things like FB and YouTube, or even just plain old websites have led to the evolution of bullying. Many kids used to be 'teased' at school but could find peace at home. The bullying that takes place online is real and horrible. It never leaves you alone And while we can debate all we (general we) that kids are all being raised to be pussies, the fact that kids are killing themselves at alarming rates due to constant bullying says something. I agree that kids were bullied when I was a kid but none of them killed themselves. When kids as young as 10 are killing themselves it is sort of hard to deny there is a problem. And telling kids that it gets better or to get over it isn't enough. It's because of a general lack of empathy that kids bully in the first place, telling kids that they need to just deal with it better does not breed empathy.
  • Kids are not just killing themselves because they are bullied.  Suicidal thoughts are a common side effect of many of the drugs they are all on now for ADHD, depression, etc.  Suicide rates rising along with the rates of kids being on prescription drugs is not a shock to me.
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
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  • Also, 2004 was the biggest jump in suicide rates for 10-14 year olds, and there were only 94 in that age group, up from the 56 the year before.

    While 94 dead kids is sad, its hardly the epidemic people are making it out to be
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
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    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
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    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_where-in-the-f?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:dba91128-eee5-4849-988a-ef02dabb588bPost:04771e70-c29c-4f4b-a9fa-d41ef9357692">Re: where in the f...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: where in the f... : That has got to be a small percentage in comparison to how many US teens there were in that age group.  I wonder what it is today and also what the rate of attempts were vs. actual deaths. 
    Posted by Dot Dash[/QUOTE]

    I think its hard to determine actual attempts since it falls under "self inflicted".  That includes cutting, etc, which isnt a suicide attempt.
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • I guess I look at it this way: if 94 kids are actually succeeding in killing themselves, how many think about it? I do think bullying is a huge epidemic and I think we generally over estimate how prepared/able kids are to deal with it and we under estimate the long term toll it can take. I can tell you this much: if 94 people died because a product was faulty or drug was dangerous people would be really upset. I feel like they should be equally upset when a kid feels like their best option is death.
  • I think bullying gets called an epidemic because with today's technology you can hear about it and hear about what happens so much faster.  One thing happens and the news spreads like wildfire.

    Crazy shiit has always happened.  It's just now, we are much more able to learn about that crazy shiit. 
    panther
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_where-in-the-f?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:dba91128-eee5-4849-988a-ef02dabb588bPost:0345d558-6998-4b9f-b248-4004f3cf4b58">Re: where in the f...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I guess I look at it this way: if 94 kids are actually succeeding in killing themselves, how many think about it? I do think bullying is a huge epidemic and I think we generally over estimate how prepared/able kids are to deal with it and we under estimate the long term toll it can take. I can tell you this much: if 94 people died because a product was faulty or drug was dangerous people would be really upset. I feel like they should be equally upset when a kid feels like their best option is death.
    Posted by number55[/QUOTE]

    I agree with everything except bullying being the reason they do it.  Statistics show that something like 90% of people who attempt suicide have a psychological issue.  So if suicide in kids is a huge epidemic, then mental illness in kids is a huge epidemic.
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_where-in-the-f?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dba91128-eee5-4849-988a-ef02dabb588bPost:0345d558-6998-4b9f-b248-4004f3cf4b58">Re: where in the f...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I guess I look at it this way: if 94 kids are actually succeeding in killing themselves, how many think about it? I do think bullying is a huge epidemic and I think we generally over estimate how prepared/able kids are to deal with it and we under estimate the long term toll it can take. I can tell you this much: if 94 people died because a product was faulty or drug was dangerous people would be really upset. I feel like they should be equally upset when a kid feels like their best option is death.
    Posted by number55[/QUOTE]
    I agree with this and sometimes bullying it not about sucking it up and moving on, especially when no one helps. My niece was bullied this year. Several facebook posts were made about her, she was hit in the head with something o the bus, and she was held down, face to the ground, while some other child hit her in the head with a brick. My SIL tried several times to get something done about this and nothing happened. Finally, the school intervened. But I wonder, just how much of that crap a child can take with out any help from grown ups or friends before they say fuckit, I have no other choice BUT this extreme choice.
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  • Ricks- I think that is an issue with the schools.  Teachers dont want to get involved, the school doesnt want to get involved.  Its in part because when they do get involved, they get a ton of shiit for it. 
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_where-in-the-f?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dba91128-eee5-4849-988a-ef02dabb588bPost:ae1f2a1f-5b55-426a-92d2-570c4e5ad636">Re: where in the f...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: where in the f... : Ricks that is terrible.  How old is your niece?  What the kid who hit her with a brick charged? 
    Posted by Dot Dash[/QUOTE]
    Both are 12. No, no charges.
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  • Ricks- did it happen on school property?
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • Oh, I completely agree, mental health in general is a massive issue, that many peole lack empathy or compassion for. And it is a huge issue for children and teens. But the bullying is still an issue because it is what precipitates the increase in mental health issues.  

    So not all people/children are equally academically inclined, or athletically inclined, artistically inclined...neither are they all equally capable to deal with the realities of bullying.  Some person can get called fagggot or whore over and over again and it won't affect them, for others it is enough to send them into a downward spiral that ends in suicial thoughts.  The reality is that not being able to throw a football or draw a masterpiece generally won't affect your general wellbeing. Not being able to deal with the horrible things that people say and do to you will affect your general wellbeing. 

    The difference between the academic/athletic/artistic examples and bullying is that bullying is done TO the person by other people. It can be avoided. I am also not one that believes that the answer lies simply in changing the bully. I believe that the victims of bullying need to be taught coping skills and more importantly, I believe bystanders can be empowered to speak up and help victims. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_where-in-the-f?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dba91128-eee5-4849-988a-ef02dabb588bPost:fb07e881-7408-41ff-9207-813316294e0b">Re: where in the f...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Ricks- I think that is an issue with the schools.  Teachers dont want to get involved, the school doesnt want to get involved.  Its in part because when they do get involved, they get a ton of shiit for it. 
    Posted by Blueyed228[/QUOTE]
    Oh I understand that, as much as it sucks, but I just think in some cases bullying can most def lead to suicidal thoughts. This would be a good research project for someone.
    image
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_where-in-the-f?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:dba91128-eee5-4849-988a-ef02dabb588bPost:fb07e881-7408-41ff-9207-813316294e0b">Re: where in the f...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Ricks- I think that is an issue with the schools.  Teachers dont want to get involved, the school doesnt want to get involved.  Its in part because when they do get involved, they get a ton of shiit for it. 
    Posted by Blueyed228[/QUOTE]

    It might be an issue with the schools, but that doesn't change the fact that the kid was bullied to the point of suicide. I think that sometimes, a teen's suicide is absolutely the cause of bullying, and not an underlying mental illness. I think trying to categorize suicides as mental illness just gives more fuel to bullying - hey, it's not our fault, the kid was mentally fvcked up to begin with!

    I do wonder if there is some kind of statistic that states how many psychological issues are <em>caused</em> by bullying, which in turn leads to suicide. Like ricks said, a kid can only take so much.
  • I think the general consensous was that teachers genuinely WANT to help, but they're too scared too.  Because admins and parents and everyone else can sue them. Our society is seriously effed up thanks to our sue-happy culture.

    And, Ricks, that's awful. I would consider that bullying. But being teased once in awhile is not the same, and that's my issue. The second anything remotely not perfect happens to someone it's BULLYING. PROTECT MY POOR PERFECT CHILD. There has to be a line somewhere, you know?
  • There was a fight in the news here this week.  2 high school girls had a brawl after school.  It wasnt on school property.  It was on youtube so the school suspended the girls for 5 days, people who video taped it for 3 days, and anyone who watched for 1 day.

    There is a fucking OUTRAGE here over the suspensions.  The parents of the kids are losing their shiit.
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • There is a radio host here who talks a lot about bullying and how there is just no real statistics on it that prove its a problem.  True or false, I dont know, but his stance on it certainly is interesting.
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_where-in-the-f?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dba91128-eee5-4849-988a-ef02dabb588bPost:33b75a5a-8c08-49fc-93d7-64ef551ae467">Re: where in the f...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I will put this much into the bullying issue: bullying 'looks' very different now because of the Internet. Things like FB and YouTube, or even just plain old websites have led to the evolution of bullying. Many kids used to be 'teased' at school but could find peace at home. The bullying that takes place online is real and horrible. It never leaves you alone And while we can debate all we (general we) that kids are all being raised to be pussies, the fact that kids are killing themselves at alarming rates due to constant bullying says something. I agree that kids were bullied when I was a kid but none of them killed themselves. When kids as young as 10 are killing themselves it is sort of hard to deny there is a problem. And telling kids that it gets better or to get over it isn't enough. It's because of a general lack of empathy that kids bully in the first place, telling kids that they need to just deal with it better does not breed empathy.
    Posted by number55[/QUOTE]
    Yeah, it is really bad now with the cyber-bullying. When I was bullied as a kid/young teen, it was definitely bad at school but I could come home and not really have to deal with it. Kids don't have that luxury nowadays because the harassment follows them home on Facebook, email, text messages, blah blah blah. Yeah the kid could just not use Facebook or whatever but other kids are still going to be spreading nasty stuff about them on there whereas when we were kids, any rumor-spreading/bullying outside school hours had to be in person or maybe over the phone if you were lucky enough to have a private phone line.

    I also hate how whenever there's a school shooting, there are quotes in the media about how the shooter liked video games and metal music or whatever like that somehow makes you into a school shooter.
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  • Im sorry, but 10 year olds shouldnt have fucking facebook, cell phones to text, access to youtube etc.
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_where-in-the-f?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dba91128-eee5-4849-988a-ef02dabb588bPost:932a9793-f944-407f-89b0-40df2828ddd8">Re: where in the f...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think the general consensous was that teachers genuinely WANT to help, but they're too scared too.  Because admins and parents and everyone else can sue them. Our society is seriously effed up thanks to our sue-happy culture. And, Ricks, that's awful. I would consider that bullying. But being teased once in awhile is not the same, and that's my issue. The second anything remotely not perfect happens to someone it's BULLYING. PROTECT MY POOR PERFECT CHILD. There has to be a line somewhere, you know?
    Posted by Steph+J[/QUOTE]
    Meh teasing sucks. I was teased (called freckle face, fatty) but it's nothing like constant bullying. You know, the constant, at school, at home, in your face, won't leave you alone type of bullying that can send someone on a downward spiral. We have an antibullying law here now, so if teacher and schools DON'T get involved, they can get in big trouble.
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  • 10 year olds don't have Facebooks (well I'm sure some of them do but I wouldn't let my 10 year old have a facebook ... if I had a 10 year old haha) but 13 and 14 year olds and older do.
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  • You guys hear about this?

    http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/health/2012/02/27/california-schoolgirls-death-in-fight-ruled-homicide/

    CN - two fifth grade girls get into a fight over a boy and one of them died later that night.
    panther
  • ricksangricksang member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited February 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_where-in-the-f?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dba91128-eee5-4849-988a-ef02dabb588bPost:2f302501-d337-4596-bf3e-aabbb3de2210">Re: where in the f...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: where in the f... : Wow.  I don't know enough to truly make an informed decision but a 12 year old IMO is old enough to know not to hit someone in the head with a brick.  I can't believe no charges. 
    Posted by Dot Dash[/QUOTE]
    I think my niece wasn't sure who did it at the time. Her face was held to the ground so it was her word against the other girl's. Yes this little b1tch knew what she was doing. She didn't like my niece because my niece is dirt poor.
    image
  • Ricks- why didnt your SIL press charges?
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_where-in-the-f?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dba91128-eee5-4849-988a-ef02dabb588bPost:0601e7f3-5380-4f5e-a803-942b95241a07">Re: where in the f...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Im sorry, but 10 year olds shouldnt have fucking facebook, cell phones to text, access to youtube etc.
    Posted by Blueyed228[/QUOTE]
    Amen sista!
    image
  • There are many statistics out there regarding bullying, plenty, as well as mental health. I can post links eventually if people are interested but I need to make dinner first and hopefully make it to hot yoga.  

    I agree with a lot of previous points regarding not giving points at games and kids growing up with poor 'life skills' and attitudes. But none of that negates that kids are hurful aholes who feed off each other to gain a sense of security. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_where-in-the-f?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:dba91128-eee5-4849-988a-ef02dabb588bPost:6850f2f9-fcf1-4343-9d7a-444814f3fb58">Re: where in the f...</a>:
    [QUOTE]You guys hear about this? <a href="http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/health/2012/02/27/california-schoolgirls-death-in-fight-ruled-homicide/" rel="nofollow">http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/health/2012/02/27/california-schoolgirls-death-in-fight-ruled-homicide/</a> CN - two fifth grade girls get into a fight over a boy and one of them died later that night.
    Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]
    Yes! That is just crazy!
    image
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_where-in-the-f?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:dba91128-eee5-4849-988a-ef02dabb588bPost:9d1ad8ab-4006-49d2-8828-d9a9289db9b1">Re: where in the f...</a>:
    [QUOTE]10 year olds don't have Facebooks (well I'm sure some of them do but I wouldn't let my 10 year old have a facebook ... if I had a 10 year old haha) but 13 and 14 year olds and older do.
    Posted by K Byte[/QUOTE]

    Dont you have to be 14 or older to have a fb account?  Parents should be controlling internet.
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
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