So I want to preface this that I am not trying to be or sound like a jerk by what I am going to ask/say.
So my FI and I emailed out to his WP members and wives (because they claim to keep their DH's schedules better) to advise them that we will be having a rehersal the night before the wedding in Sept around 5pm with more details to follow. We only want to let you know so early so that you can adjust your schedule and have plenty of time to adjust around work (some of the party members are police officers and fire fighters so they don't have a set schedule).
My FI's brother responded that he wants his wife to come to the RD, which was followed with his wife asking for specific details of times and locations so that they can plan right now.
So I guess my question is are significant others/wives/husbands etc. invited to RD's too? At this time my FI's family is not paying for the RD which makes my family very upset as it's tradition for the groom's family to pay right? Since we are totally strapped we will be forced to do something more low key like at a pizza place. I feel bad, but honestly we already have 10 WP members, 2 sets of parents, us that's 16 people then if we have to invite significant others, a couple of OOT guests (like my godmother who is coming from VA) we won't be able to afford a nice $20/30 per person dinner.
I understand that the RD is a way to say thank you to those in the wedding and I want to do something nice, I just assumed since no one in the WP is local to that area and everyone on FI's side has children that they would just stay home with their kids the night before.
Help! What is the proper procedure for all of this?