June 2012 Weddings

To plan for a church wedding ot just be married by the judge?

I have been looking forward to a church wedding all my life. I dreamt that someday, I will march on the aisle. As I am entering the 30ish period, I have been contemplating of just going to the nearest judge and ask the judge to officiate our marriage. This is due to the fact that I led a busy work. And yet, at the back of my mind, I still wanted to get married in the church. Family tradition dictates that I should choose getting married in the church, but that option requires budget and great planning. What, wht now? I am confused....

Re: To plan for a church wedding ot just be married by the judge?

  • I would say do what you want. I have always wanted a church wedding and that is what FI and I will have. You just need to listen to your heart and decided what you want. 
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  • Yes it will require budgeting and planning - but in several years, when you look back, do you think you will regret not having the wedding you wanted?  It is definitely not easy, especially if you want to get married NOW, but a choice has to be made.
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  • I don't think busyness should keep you from having the wedding that you've dreamed of. It just takes planning and discipline. I've got three jobs and grad school, but this is what I've always wanted, so we're having a church wedding. My FI is great and really supportive. How does your FI feel about it? I'm guessing you haven't set a date yet?
  • It will take some time and planning but in the end, you will have to make that decision. I know it's not terribly helpful, but noone can make this decision for you. Your FI might also have some input into the type of wedding that he wants.

    On a side note, please delete this account and start with a new one; using your email account as a screen name on any website puts you at risk of hackers, identity thefts, etc.

    Vacation White Knot
  • I can't even read this post, it hardly makes sense. 

    But from what I gather you want a church wedding. Most people have to wait due to planning and money and other reasons. It's pretty normal. 
  • I have no other tips beyond what's already been said. 

    Just FYI though, you may want to make a new account and use something other than your email as your sn.
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  • edited April 2012
    the thing about church weddings is that they can still be as big or as small as you wish. At one point FI and I had delayed our wedding because we didn't think we had the means for it, but we wanted it so badly, that we decided to go for it anyway and even moved up the date. Our budget is basically non-existing. we have only invited our family and just a few of the CLOSEST friends. We are doing a dessert reception. it will be simple and sweet and even though planning a wedding in 3 months is by no means the easiest thing to do, it is doable. We have received so much support and help from our family. Everyone is involved in some way or another. Maybe that is an option for you? Or maybe you can take the time to save up for a bigger, more classic wedding next summer?
    I would say, if a church wedding is your dream, you should probably go for it. just do it thoughtfully and with an open mind.
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  • I agree with PP.

    It is okay for your wants and wishes to change over time. As a little girl I always thought I would have the big Catholic wedding. Partially because that's what my parents did and the rest of my family as done. However, I rarely go to church now and FI is not Catholic. I gave some serious thought to having our wedding in the church. FI was supportive and would have done it. Yet, we both wanted his dad to marry us which could not happen in the church. For us it is important to share this moment with family and have his dad marry us then to just get married in a church because of some childhood dream.
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