Lacking...

trent13 · November 2012

I am so lacking motivation and money right now for our wedding. I don't know what's wrong with me I feel like I've fallen so far behind with planning and I can't make a decison to save my life or if I do eventually make one I always want to change it. Also I keep getting reminders that are overdue on my wedding website checklist

ugh is any other bride feeling like this???

Knottie1450123632 · November 2012

im the same way. the best thing to do is talk to the FI about things

maybe he has great ideas as well.

i change my mind as well

trent13 · November 2012

He just gets annoyed when I change my mind and he always says " Well why don't you go talk to my Mom " I just want to slap him not that I often agree with violence.

Chels&Jimmy · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_lacking?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:239b02dd-0734-4cc0-b261-d22901ae1e5dPost:bdc79446-3a2a-487e-b9a5-5bb720123473">Lacking...</a>:
[QUOTE]I am so lacking motivation and money right now for our wedding. I don't know what's wrong with me I feel like I've fallen so far behind with planning and I can't make a decison to save my life or if I do eventually make one I always want to change it. Also I keep getting reminders that are overdue on my wedding website checklist :/ ugh is any other bride feeling like this???
Posted by trent13[/QUOTE]

<div>I am feeling like this right now too. Work has been slow for me, and FI has recently taken a big pay cut at work, so we are really tight on funds and putting money into our wedding account has been a challenge. I think my lack of planning motivation stems from my wedding money worries. Our planning has been going in fits and spurts anyway though, so I'm looking at this as a momentary break. </div>

Knottie1450123632 · November 2012

tell him im not marrying your mom im marrying you. i would explain the reason behind changing mind

trent13 · November 2012

His Mom does give great advice usually, and she is really supportive but it would be nice to hear something different from him... Some guys just are not into planning weddings.

Knottie1450123632 · November 2012

true when mine says whatever or anything that isnt constructive. i tell him ok dont complain later lol since you havent given help lol

emineminem · November 2012

I am feeling EXACTLY the same way right now. Thanks for the cameraderie

I'm feeling so stressed since I'm not getting any work done due to my lack of motivation. FI is "trying to help" but we all know that's not really helping... grrrrr....

I'm keeping faith that we'll get out of the slump soon!

Knottie1450123632 · November 2012

yep im finding lack of motivation due to mom not here thru processss she passed.. but i have pple telling me she is with you. well not physically doesnt really help and in the next breath my friend says ooo me and my mom going dress

my MOH and i are going dress shopping sat. part of me wants to say F it.

sorry for being blue just harder than thought

keyaira04 · November 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_lacking?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:239b02dd-0734-4cc0-b261-d22901ae1e5dPost:2ff177fc-781c-4352-ae02-a3a5304316f5">Re: Lacking...</a>:
[QUOTE]yep im finding lack of motivation due to mom not here thru processss she passed.. but i have pple telling me she is with you. well not physically doesnt really help and in the next breath my friend says ooo me and my mom going dress my MOH and i are going dress shopping sat. part of me wants to say F it. :( sorry for being blue just harder than thought
Posted by southerncutie[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I am sorry to hear that. You are right, no one but you and those that do not have there mom to go thru this know where you are coming from. Take your time until you feel better. </div><div>
</div><div>I have hit a "what else is there to do" block. As a result, I may take a break to enjoy the holidays and go back to heavy planning at the start of the year.

</div>

shilotony2012 · November 2012

Phew. I thought I was the only one. I am soooo not wanting to plan right now. FI has been laid off for almost 2 years so mine is the only income coming in. He was getting unemployment, but something happened and that is on hold until they relook at it. Christmas is coming. If we didnt have kids it wouldnt matter, but they do need gifts. Plus my son's birthday is the day AFTER Christmas so he needs a birthday gift. Plus, my job is soo stressful and defeating me right now. I have a very difficuly case that I spend most of my time dealing with, which means I am behind on my other cases. I have court reports to write, meetings to plan, and an all day training tomorrow that I DO NOT have time for. I will probably have to go into work this weekend. Add on ,my son has behavioral and psychological issues, he now has a home bound tutor because he cant deal with school, and my daughter refuses to do work or turn in the work she does, she is failing some classes. And shes only in 6th grade!!!

And, Im frustrated with Fi because I leave him lists to do all day( no Im not a snot, he asks for lists, says its easier to get things done) and he hardly does half of it. He is home ALL DAY!!! I love him so much, but he is just annoying me lately and I have no idea why!! He is so helpful and loveable and adorable, BUT he gets on my nerves!!!

I have been slacking on the gym lately. I really really want to go, but cant get there. Im too tired in the morning to go before work, and I am drained after work.
Oiy, sorry, didnt realize I was so out of sorts...

Knottie1450123632 · December 2012

its ok

i think we all go thru this issue to some degree or another

Winnertag1 · December 2012

Right there with you, I am lacking motivation too. I have way too much going on and have no time to do anything wedding related, meanwhile FI has even more going on and has even less time to do anything wedding related.

The biggest concern on our list right now is figuring out when we are going to be doing our pre cana, we are waiting for FI to get his school schedule to see which day of the week works for him.

NateandJustine · December 2012

I'm so thankful that I am not the only one feeling this way! FI is the only one who works ( I can't find a job!) He pays for everything and I feel really bad. Right now we can't do anything for the wedding because we are stilling paying for our house in PA and rent here in CA plus all of the other bills. We talked about money and paying for everything the other night and FI was like we can just put everything on credit cards and it will be fine. I don't want him to put everything on his credit cards. I want to order stuff and book all of our rentals, but I don't want to at the same time. Hopefully, I get a job soon and I can start paying for stuff myself!

On the positive side, we picked a new honeymoon spot! FI finally told me that he wasn't really into taking the cruise and that is why we didn't book it yet. I'm way more excited about our new choice! We are going to go to Lake Tahoe! It is more us, and I still get my beach and clear waters!

Keep your heads up ladies! We will get through this and we will be excited to plan and do more wedding stuff and the funds will be there!!

Have a great weekend!

Knottie1450123632 · December 2012

i love tahoe

Chels&Jimmy · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_lacking?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:239b02dd-0734-4cc0-b261-d22901ae1e5dPost:682dc45d-e006-47c2-8c93-4edf65d97aa3">Re: Lacking...</a>:
[QUOTE]Keep your heads up ladies! We will get through this and we will be excited to plan and do more wedding stuff and the funds will be there!!
Posted by NateandJustine[/QUOTE]

<div>Some good words Justine - I like your positivity. Thanks. :) </div>

Beads921 · December 2012

I am currently on yet another planning hiatus. I basically do one thing and then forget about wedding planning for a month. I booked our DJ 3 weeks ago and picked up my dress last week, and that's been more than enough for now. I keep saying I'll kick it into high gear in early 2013. Whether or not that happens remains to be seen.

Liane28 · December 2012

I hear you ladies! Budget has been really tight for me too, but little by little, things are coming together.

Large deposits suck ***, but at least it's less to pay later on. The hardest thing for me has been that our plans changed a lot from what we had wanted in the beginning because people seem to forget that this is our special day, not necessarily theirs (I know it's a big day for the parents, etc, but they've had their day and this is ours). We originally wanted a very small wedding, but now our guest list is at 110 because both moms keep making us feel bad for not inviting so and so!

The good thing about that is that our venue does not allow more than 110 people, so at least I can rest knowing it won't be getting any bigger haha

Belle0720 · December 2012

I'm still doing lots of planning but my motivation has definitely slowed down from earlier on in our engagement and I take breaks anytime I feel like I've hit a road block.

And I have a hard time making decisions too! I always have a very specific vision in mind for every little detail and then there never seems to be a product that exactly fits the bill. So I end up asking my FI, mom, and sister for their opinion a lot. I created websites through like five different domains and ended up not liking their templates or font or whatever so eventually I created our own website on wix.com. You wouldn't believe how many times I asked for their opinions on that!

Really early on in planning my FI had griped about not wanting to hear something and told me to talk to my sister about it. I explained to him that it's his wedding too and he should be my go-to person for making wedding decisions, not my sister(although she is extremely helpful too). Since then he has been really supportive. Don't get me wrong he definitely gets burnt out on wedding talk, but I never imagined he'd be this involved in the whole planning process and I am really happy I had that talk with him early on. He even wanted to help me pick my dress lol and keeps telling me he wants to see pictures of it.

Also you can always come to the knot if you need advice or help making decisions--there are lots of brides on here happy to give support!

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