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So I'm getting the silent treatment...

Amt2109Amt2109
First Comment First Anniversary
in Wedding Woes

H and I are going to a baby shower on the 9th. Or so he told me (the invite went to his email).

So I requested to work an early on the 9th. So far so good, right? Wrong. Date of it is actually the 7th, the 9th is a Monday and I don't work Mondays.

I have to tell them today about the mix up which ordinarily wouldn't be a big deal, but I already feel like I'm messing them about (switched from lates to earlies because MVA have lied to me so much. First I was illegal to drive, now its don't be so stupid of course you can drive on this). This at least was avoidable, if he'd read the email properly. AND PUT IT ON THE CALENDAR. I keep asking him to please use the calendar.

I realised this morning that the 9th was a Monday. Come down, and calmly ask what date the shower is. He says 'the Saturday after the 4th'. I mention calmly that he initially told me the 9th, which is the date I told work.

Now he's giving me the silent treatment because he thinks I'm pissed off at him.

(I feel like smacking him over the head. Dude, I am pissed. But not enough to start a screaming match with you. I just don't like messing work around).

*sigh*

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Re: So I'm getting the silent treatment...

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    WzzWzz member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited June 2012
    and this is worthy of silent treatment?

    ETA - and you were really pissed about this? you should have checked a calendar before requesting a day from work anyway.
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    PMeg819PMeg819 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer

    So you're both 16?

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    tawillerstawillers member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    What's the driving stuff you are talking about?
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    Amt2109Amt2109
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    edited June 2012
    I have an English driving license. MVA initially told me I wasn't allowed to drive on it, and had me start jumping through their hoops. This entailed several visits where I was missing something each time because they hadn't told me I needed it. And that all my identity documents (including the letter from DHS with the watermark) couldn't be used because I didn't keep envelopes.

    So this is going on over a few months. H is getting annoyed because he has to drive seven days a week (He works Mon-Thurs, I work Fri-Sun).

    When I passed my law test, the guy right there told me I needed a learners permit. He gave me a number and told me to wait. When we got called, the guy looked through all my documents and said 'Why do you need a learners permit? You know you can drive on this, right?'.

    As for me checking the calendar, yes, I should have. But, he told me it was the 9th, and for some reason I trusted that he'd read the email. I won't be making that mistake again. And yes, he's still being a little funny about it. God knows why. I haven't said one word in a raised tone to him.


    EDIT: This was really more of a vent I guess. The calendar thing is one of those petty things that bugs me. And I don't see why I should ask him three times to make sure something is right when he could just tell me the right info the first time. Is this a normal thing? Are men just this way?
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    baconsmombaconsmom member
    5 Love Its First Answer First Anniversary Name Dropper
    Yes. All men are the same all the time, by virtue of having a penis. Just like all of us ladies are the same, because we are ladies. 

    Sorry. The whole "this is just how men/women are" thing just pushes every button I have, yo. 


    image
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    Amt2109Amt2109
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_so-im-getting-the-silent-treatment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:07c21464-dfc2-46d9-88dc-698605a4e54dPost:f66304f2-916e-4983-b6ec-72774f5e3347">Re: So I'm getting the silent treatment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Yes. All men are the same all the time, by virtue of having a penis. Just like all of us ladies are the same, because we are ladies.  Sorry. The whole "this is just how men/women are" thing just pushes every button I have, yo. 
    Posted by baconsmom[/QUOTE]

    Ordinarily I agree, though I hear things like this all the time from friends and family.

    And while I know, rationally, that certain things are petty (calendar, laundry on the floor, socks all over the living room carpet...) I sometimes just get that 'I signed on to be a wife to you, not your mom' feeling.
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    6again6again member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    edited June 2012
    A mom would pick up the socks and take care of switching dates for the baby shower.  A wife says "tough schit your socks are all dirty.  looks like you're going to the baby shower in sandals.  alone.  Hope you bought the gift."
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    hmonkeyhmonkey member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    boys will be boys!
    image
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    TKzillaTKzilla member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    That sounds really frustrating. Maybe next time he gets an email invite to something, ask him to forward you the email. Let him give you the silent treatment for awhile, if you like. You could go to him and explain that you're not mad, if you want to do that instead. He might not be mad because he thinks you're mad, he might be mad because he feels he's not doing things "right enough" for you. Just take some time and calm down before you guys work it out. :)
    image
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    BTCarolusBTCarolus
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_so-im-getting-the-silent-treatment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:07c21464-dfc2-46d9-88dc-698605a4e54dPost:f5f65712-9627-4783-92ba-648ce6cba13a">Re: So I'm getting the silent treatment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]A mom would pick up the socks and take care of switching dates for the baby shower.  A wife says "tough schit your socks are all dirty.  looks like you're going to the baby shower in sandals.  alone.  Hope you bought the gift."
    Posted by 6again[/QUOTE]
    Yeah, I don't think I'd go to the shower, unless it's, like, your absolute best friend who just happened to have the invite sent to DH.
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    fizzylemonadefizzylemonade member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_so-im-getting-the-silent-treatment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:07c21464-dfc2-46d9-88dc-698605a4e54dPost:29000f2b-7e2e-4742-8104-728da4babd2b">Re: So I'm getting the silent treatment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I have an English driving license. MVA initially told me I wasn't allowed to drive on it, and had me start jumping through their hoops. This entailed several visits where I was missing something each time because they hadn't told me I needed it. And that all my identity documents (including the letter from DHS with the watermark) couldn't be used because I didn't keep envelopes. So this is going on over a few months. H is getting annoyed because he has to drive seven days a week (He works Mon-Thurs, I work Fri-Sun). When I passed my law test, the guy right there told me I needed a learners permit. He gave me a number and told me to wait. When we got called, the guy looked through all my documents and said 'Why do you need a learners permit? You know you can drive on this, right?'. Posted by Amt2109[/QUOTE]

    I can totally relate to this. It took 5 trips to the DMV for me to get a license in NJ (from an English one). And every time my Dad had to take time off work. We would fix one thing, then they would find something else. Unfortunately there are too many rules and too many people who don't know what they are. And we ran into the envelope problem too. It's just one of those things that you've got to put up with moving countries. I hope you get it all settled soon.
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