1 month old

reesepzor · July 2010

What's your opinion of having a 1 month old at your wedding?

danieliza1127 · July 2010

I think most mothers won't leave their 1 month old baby. I don't see what harm it would do to have it at your reception. It will likely just sleep the entire time. Babies are much less disruptive than toddlers who will actually be running around and out on the dance floor.

My BM had her 1 month old at our wedding reception and she slept the entire time, even being at a table next to the dance floor and DJ. My MOH had a 3 month old, and he pretty much slept the whole time too. It didn't take away anything from my time or my reception.

noodle_oo · July 2010

Um, I would probably never leave my 1 month old baby with a babysitting I did not know. But that is just me.

I'm not sure why you are so against babies and not the 3 year old cousin(s). Babies are actually very quiet and almost easier to deal with than infants and toddlers. They tend to sleep a lot and so they can be kept very quietly with the in laws. With my nieces/nephews, we could still go out to restaurants while they were babies. It was once they were older that they became more mobile and vocal that it was too tough to eat out anymore.

Anyway, I would try to be a bit more accommodating for your sister. Dealing with a new baby is not easy, and if it is her first, it can be very hard to leave them. She will be going through a lot, so try to be more sensitive to her. The day of your wedding, you probably won't even notice the babies that are there. If you ban babies altogether, there is a good chance your sister and other friends with babies will not be able to come to the wedding. So decide what is more important to you, having them there or not having their babies there.

waltzingmatilda13 · July 2010

We had 3 babies at our reception and I honestly had to think about that for a few minutes to be sure I had the right number. We never once noticed them. They were held by someone the entire time and didn't make a peep.

I would never expect any mother to leave her child alone after 1 month. It's just not gonna happen. I think you need to be a little more understanding and come up with another solution.

georgia_bride09 · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dont-want-babies-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:1e670e5d-eed8-4704-a7dc-079daeadd2ccPost:bfe7c60d-f0dd-451a-b7bc-4bc524157a7a">Don't Want Babies at Reception....</a>:
[QUOTE] Her baby is only going to be 1 month old and I think she would spend the majority of the time tending to the baby instead of performing her duties as maid of honor. I'm confused because I don't want to be selfish to her, but it is OUR wedding day and the day is about us. Am I wrong in thinking this? How would you handle this situation?
Posted by reesepzor[/QUOTE]

What exactly are you going to have your MOH doing at the reception that she'll be too busy to tend to her one-month old baby?

It sounds like you're afraid the babies will "steal your thunder". Grow up.

lkpeaocck · July 2010

Alright as a mom, I'm more than able to tell you that you've got it all backwards.

First off, those babies will sleep the ENTIRE time, while those wonderful little toddlers you're insisting on having will be tearing the joint up.

Second, no mother in their right mind would ever leave their one month old alone with anyone, not even grandparents, let alone a random babysitter.

Third, in regards to your MOH, you're asking her to pick between your wedding and her CHILD. You lose, hands down.

Personally, I think you're the one being unreasonable, and to be completely honest, a little rude. I know I would never pick anyones wedding, not even my own, over my own child. And I would be more than hurt if someone expected me to leave my newborn alone for four hours with a stranger just because they didn't want my child "ruining" their wedding.

lkpeaocck · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dont-want-babies-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:1e670e5d-eed8-4704-a7dc-079daeadd2ccPost:ccd24d28-1685-43f4-9dcf-c239a77b3822">Re: Don't Want Babies at Reception....</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Don't Want Babies at Reception.... : What exactly are you going to have your MOH doing at the reception that she'll be too busy to tend to her one-month old baby? It sounds like you're afraid the babies will "steal your thunder". Grow up.
Posted by georgia_bride09[/QUOTE]

This.

waltzingmatilda13 · July 2010

That was fast.

clarereedy · July 2010

We aren't having any children (under 18) at our wedding.

My MOH just had a baby. The baby will be four months old at the time of the wedding and she has a 2 year old who is my ring bearer. Her SIL will be watching the baby and the ring bearer is going back to the hotel with his other grandmother. This was all her decision and her planning though.

Mrs.B6302007 · July 2010

my month old would sleep the whole time. or nurse but you would probably have a problem with me whipping it out at the reception, wouldn't you?

ETA: and before anyone gets all pissy, this was tongue in cheek

Mrs.B6302007 · July 2010

Oh, and as far as tending to the baby's needs goes, being a mom trumps MOH.

janedoe1113a · July 2010

I didn't see the OP, so my answer is based off the responses.

If you ask her to choose your wedding or being with her baby, she's going to choose the baby.

reesepzor · July 2010

Well, I was just trying to get an honest opinion and I guess I got them, thanks for the reality check. I will allow the children & babies to come and i'm sure it will be fine all around. I think my fiance and I were just creating unreal scenarios our heads and it seems like babies seem to be pretty quiet in the scenarios that you all are listing. Thanks ladies.

georgia_bride09 · July 2010

For future reference, reese, don't delete you original post. It's not nice and people don't appreciate it.

glam70s · July 2010

My niece is almost 7 months old and just now is my sister starting to leave her for a few hours at a time, and only if she's safe in the hands of other family members. I cannot imagine any mother leaving a child under 6 months old - especially not if they don't know and trust the babysitter.

You're right in that your bridesmaids and MOH will likely spend a fair bit of time that day taking care of the children. Unfortunately there's nothing to be done about that except be understanding and make sure you're not expecting them to do more than they'll reasonably have time for. Sure, this is your wedding, but honestly, there are more important things...

salt78 · July 2010

How about if you word your post the way it was originally?

" Her baby is only going to be 1 month old and I think she would spend the majority of the time tending to the baby instead of performing her duties as maid of honor. "

cdeguide74 · July 2010

NO WAY are you being selfish or immature! It's your day! The fact that it's not just 1 baby, it's SEVERAL babies that would be attending. Your wedding is a formal affair, nor a romper room. It's one evening...a reception is what, 6 hours, tops. If your friends are that stuck on not separating themselves from their children then that's their choice but for them to expect you to be okay with babies and playppens layong all over your reception floor is rude. It's your day, it's about you and your new husband celebrating your marriage. A reception hall is not a place for infants!

salt78 · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dont-want-babies-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:1e670e5d-eed8-4704-a7dc-079daeadd2ccPost:aabb2451-246f-45ca-b9a0-59b68862ef54">Re: 1 month old</a>:
[QUOTE]NO WAY are you being selfish or immature! It's your day! The fact that it's not just 1 baby, it's SEVERAL babies that would be attending. Your wedding is a formal affair, nor a romper room. It's one evening...a reception is what, 6 hours, tops. If your friends are that stuck on not separating themselves from their children then that's their choice but for them to expect you to be okay with babies and playppens layong all over your reception floor is rude. It's your day, it's about you and your new husband celebrating your marriage. A reception hall is not a place for infants!
Posted by cdeguide74[/QUOTE]

<div>This made me laugh. Like a lot.</div>

akhensley81 · July 2010

WTF?

KellyLovesJames · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dont-want-babies-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:1e670e5d-eed8-4704-a7dc-079daeadd2ccPost:aabb2451-246f-45ca-b9a0-59b68862ef54">Re: 1 month old</a>:
[QUOTE]NO WAY are you being selfish or immature! It's your day! The fact that it's not just 1 baby, it's SEVERAL babies that would be attending. Your wedding is a formal affair, nor a romper room. It's one evening...a reception is what, 6 hours, tops. If your friends are that stuck on not separating themselves from their children then that's their choice but for them to expect you to be okay with babies and playppens layong all over your reception floor is rude. It's your day, it's about you and your new husband celebrating your marriage. A reception hall is not a place for infants!
Posted by cdeguide74[/QUOTE]

WOW... they're really anti-baby in Chicago.

waltzingmatilda13 · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dont-want-babies-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:1e670e5d-eed8-4704-a7dc-079daeadd2ccPost:aabb2451-246f-45ca-b9a0-59b68862ef54">Re: 1 month old</a>:
[QUOTE]NO WAY are you being selfish or immature! It's your day! The fact that it's not just 1 baby, it's SEVERAL babies that would be attending. Your wedding is a formal affair, nor a romper room. It's one evening...a reception is what, 6 hours, tops. If your friends are that stuck on not separating themselves from their children then that's their choice but for them to expect you to be okay with babies and playppens layong all over your reception floor is rude. It's your day, it's about you and your new husband celebrating your marriage. A reception hall is not a place for infants!
Posted by cdeguide74[/QUOTE]

How did you read this when it was deleted 20 minutes ago?

cdeguide74 · July 2010

No, we're not anti-baby. We know what's appropriate and not for formal gatherings. You don't bring an infant to a black tie affair!

salt78 · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dont-want-babies-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:1e670e5d-eed8-4704-a7dc-079daeadd2ccPost:82908ab0-b2ca-42aa-919f-306215cf447a">Re: 1 month old</a>:
[QUOTE]No, we're not anti-baby. We know what's appropriate and not for formal gatherings. You don't bring an infant to a black tie affair!
Posted by cdeguide74[/QUOTE]

<div>Yeah you guys!! Don't you know the world will END if you bring a baby to a reception!?</div><div>
</div><div>God you guys are so stupid. </div>

KellyLovesJames · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dont-want-babies-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:1e670e5d-eed8-4704-a7dc-079daeadd2ccPost:82908ab0-b2ca-42aa-919f-306215cf447a">Re: 1 month old</a>:
[QUOTE]No, we're not anti-baby. We know what's appropriate and not for formal gatherings. You don't bring an infant to a black tie affair!
Posted by cdeguide74[/QUOTE]

What if the infant is in a black tie?

cdeguide74 · July 2010

Obviously I read it before it got deleted...

janedoe1113a · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dont-want-babies-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:1e670e5d-eed8-4704-a7dc-079daeadd2ccPost:82908ab0-b2ca-42aa-919f-306215cf447a">Re: 1 month old</a>:
[QUOTE]No, we're not anti-baby. We know what's appropriate and not for formal gatherings. You don't bring an infant to a black tie affair!
Posted by cdeguide74[/QUOTE]

I hope your sister has a baby a month before your wedding. I want to see you tell her that her baby isn't allowed and her respond that she will not be there.

FutureMrsTR · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dont-want-babies-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:1e670e5d-eed8-4704-a7dc-079daeadd2ccPost:aabb2451-246f-45ca-b9a0-59b68862ef54">Re: 1 month old</a>:
[QUOTE]NO WAY are you being selfish or immature! It's your day! The fact that it's not just 1 baby, it's SEVERAL babies that would be attending. Your wedding is a formal affair, nor a romper room. It's one evening...a reception is what, 6 hours, tops. If your friends are that stuck on not separating themselves from their children then that's their choice but for them to expect you to be okay with babies and playppens layong all over your reception floor is rude. It's your day, it's about you and your new husband celebrating your marriage. A reception hall is not a place for infants!
Posted by cdeguide74[/QUOTE]

The funny thing is, these girls who are all "It's MY DAY!" now are going to be the parents from hell who biitch up a storm when their precious Madyson/Laiylah/Kyleigh isn't invited to some wedding down the road.

salt78 · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_dont-want-babies-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:1e670e5d-eed8-4704-a7dc-079daeadd2ccPost:889ccafd-83a0-41c4-ab97-2b4370e668ef">Re: 1 month old</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: 1 month old : Madyson/Laiylah/Kyleigh
Posted by FutureMrsTR[/QUOTE]

<div>*snort*</div>

Knittibell · July 2010

Her baby is only going to be 1 month old and I think she would spend the majority of the time tending to the baby instead of performing her duties as maid of honor. I'm confused because I don't want to be selfish to her, but it is OUR wedding day and the day is about us.

Apart from standing next to you at the altar and holding your bouquet, what, exactly, do you see her duties as being?

If the dad is the Usher, he'd be at the back of the room anyhow, have him hold the baby so that if it fusses, Dad can walk outside with him.

It's your wedding day, not your royal coronation. I'm all for no-kids at weddings, but newborns are a universal exeption.

My best friend went to her brother's wedding with her husband and their 2 month old- and they did the same thing you're proposing- it was a good idea in theory but in practice it sucked- she missed pretty much everything at the reception because she had to keep running back to feed the baby.

If it's any consolation, I don't think the baby will intentionally steal your thunder, but I'm not making any promises. And, since you mentioned it, you're being pretty selfish.

KellyLovesJames · July 2010

If I had a baby.... I'd bring him to your reception in this and make sure he was hopped up on sugar.

Knittibell · July 2010

Here's the OP-

So here's the situation..

I'm a 28 year old girl getting married at the end of October and my older sister (age 30) is due to have her baby in mid September. There are also 2 other bridesmaids who have babies as well.

My fiance and I WOULD do a "No Children" wedding except for the fact that I have 5 first cousins between the ages of 3-15 which I definately want at the wedding because I am close with them. However, we do not want any newborns or babies at our reception.

My mom and I came up with a solution to hire a babysitter for the hotel so that the babies can be attended to right next to the reception hall.

My sister's in laws are also coming to our reception. When I told my sister that we are having babysitters at the hotel during the reception, she said, well, I would like to have him at the reception hall for a little bit because he's only one month old and then my inlaws can take him to the hotel if he's finiky. Then she mentioned something about bringing a playpen to our reception to put in the reception hall. This made me VERY angry. I told her that the whole reason we were getting a babysitter at the hotel was to take care of all of the newborns. This is OUR WEDDING, not a daycare! Also, since her baby will only be one month old, isn't it more sensitive to sickness & noise? It's a bar atmosphere with loud music and I don't think it's appropriate.

Since she is the maid of honor and her husband is our usher, I don't think it's unreasonable for them to leave the baby with the babysitter. I also think it is more than fair that I am setting up a babysitter for my other bridesmaids during the reception. I think if everyone has their babies (all under 1 year old) around, they would not be able to enjoy themselves.

Her baby is only going to be 1 month old and I think she would spend the majority of the time tending to the baby instead of performing her duties as maid of honor. I'm confused because I don't want to be selfish to her, but it is OUR wedding day and the day is about us.

Am I wrong in thinking this? How would you handle this situation?

1 month old

Re: 1 month old

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