My fiance and I don't really like his mother, but we want to invite her to the wedding. The problem is she's going to want to be involved in the wedding planning. We really don't want to give her any significant responsibilities because she tends to blow up over the smallest things. I really don't want to have her plan, say, the rehearsal dinner, and then have her randomly get angry a month from the wedding and leave it all for us to deal with at the last minute.
We asked my mom, who has already starting helping us plan, for advice. She suggested just asking his mother for opinions on things, like showing her three shades of purple and asking what she liked best. The problem with this is that his mother tends to be very stubborn, thinks her opinion is always right, and gets really angry if we don't do exactly what she said, so asking her opinion on anything important to us would likely end in disaster. And we can't just ask her opinion on minor things because she's smart enough to know that she's not contributing significantly, which would also anger her.
So I guess what I'm trying to ask is, how can we have my future mother-in-law involved in planning the wedding without letting her actually plan anything for the wedding?