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Need Advice

tusshie2004tusshie2004 member
First Comment
in Washington-Seattle
So... The FI and I decided that we were going to get married on December 10th of next year but now he wants to move the wedding up to March 20th! I am freaking out because one: one of my bridesmaids is overseas and won't be back tell summer. I will fell horrible without her there. She is one of my childhood friends and I want her there. Also, 4 months is not enough time to plan. I'm obsessive compulsive and need things orginized. I would rather get married in the summer but he is adimit about getting married in March. It will be our 2 year anniversary. What should I do?

Any advice will be helpful.

Thank you for reading.
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Re: Need Advice

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    mgoss228mgoss228 member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I would have a good talk with your FI, and tell him why pushing the date up would be an emotional/sanity hardship for you.  Maybe you guys can compromise to another month next year, maybe sometime in the summer or fall (when your overseas BM will be back).  These things are best to just talk out and open a good line of communication.
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    amandaswamandasw member
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_washington-seattle_need-advice-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:104Discussion:147096ae-86fe-487e-bb78-dd5117f3d13dPost:de830572-dc67-472d-8369-7db3336331ba">Need Advice</a>:
    [QUOTE] I would rather get married in the summer but he is adimit about getting married in March. It will be our 2 year anniversary.
    Posted by tusshie2004[/QUOTE]

    Is his only reason because it's your anniversary?  IMO, it would take more than that to make me want to rush through the planning process and hurt a really good friend.  Like PP said, talk to him about it.  Why does he suddenly feel so strongly?
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    fancynewbeccafancynewbecca
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Yeah, how about March 20th on your 3 year anniversary? I know it's a long time to wait. I think I would be a crazy person if I was only given 4 months to plan our wedding. Try to get him to see it from your perspective.
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    tusshie2004tusshie2004 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thanks ladies. We will talk about it. I just don't want to stress myself out. I need at least 8 months to a year to plan. Thanfully, my future MIL and FIL will be helping us plan.
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    kinmir30kinmir30
    First Comment First Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    IMO you won't be able to plan a wedding in four months anyway. 80% of vendors will be booked this close to the date...
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    hsunijhsunij
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    well. its actually possible to plan a wedding that soon... but you probably wouldnt have to be working AND you may have "settle" on a lot :( my cousin got engaged 2 weeks ago and is getting married in feb of 2011. shes making it work and doesnt seem to upset about it.

    but in your case, it sounds like there should be some compromise on what you both want and if hes just stuck on a date, then thats silly. There are so many other factors involved. Money, guests, planning, etc...
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    jackscbjackscb
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Yes, you would really have to have a relaxed, roll with the punches attitude if you wanted to plan it that soon!!  I think it is possible, but stressful.  I definitely agree with pp that you need to have a talk with your FI.  Maybe think of an aniversary for your first trip together, or first camping trip etc to try to tie in a landmark in your relationship - if that's what he is getting stuck on.  Sorry you're having to stress over this!!
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    KatiScarletKatiScarlet member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My sneaky advice:
    You can tell him you'd like to keep that anniversary special.  Combining them would feel like canceling out the first one and replacing it with the wedding anniversary, and that would ruin it for you.
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    SoonToBeSweetSoonToBeSweet
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    March?!?!?! that is insane! i agree, sit down and tell him how you feel. For your wedding, it is either the most important day of your life, or you could skip the big drama and go to the JOP.  If it is the most important day of your life, everything should be perfect! Don't be afraid to push for what you want.

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