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Tacky?

LayceeDLayceeD
in Texas-Dallas and Ft. Worth
Well here is my question... I fiance and I have lived together for almost 5 years now. So we have a fully furnished house with everything we need. Since we got engaged people have asked me about getting registered and if Im going to do an engagement party etc. But my problem is like I said we have lived together for almost 5 years we have a toaster and a vacuum and things like that, what I would really love is for our friends instead of buying us those types of gifts is to like donate to a honeymoon fund or something but how do I go about asking that without it sounding tacky?
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Re: Tacky?

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    Mariah09202008Mariah09202008
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think this is becoming more common. 

    I think you should still register for some gifts because some people are old fashioned and are going to want to buy you something.  Maybe think along the lines of stuff at Home Depot or new towels or something....

    I don't think it's tacky...but if I were invited to a wedding where there was a honeymoon registry and nothing else, odds are I would just either give you money or buy you something random that you probably don't need/want :)

    ETA:  I do think it's tacky to ask for money to "fund" your honeymoon.  But I do think that asking for people to put money towards "extras" on your honeymoon is ok.
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    linzcw04linzcw04
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_texas-dallas-ft-worth_tacky?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:102Discussion:77b0a6e9-5915-4877-ac9c-118ad8d6a6dfPost:e08c37be-f4be-4c3d-939f-184424a05d9a">Re: Tacky?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think this is becoming more common.  I think you should still register for some gifts because some people are old fashioned and are going to want to buy you something.  Maybe think along the lines of stuff at Home Depot or new towels or something.... I don't think it's tacky...but if I were invited to a wedding where there was a honeymoon registry and nothing else, odds are I would just either give you money or buy you something random that you probably don't need/want :) ETA:  I do think it's tacky to ask for money to "fund" your honeymoon.  But I do think that asking for people to put money towards "extras" on your honeymoon is ok.
    Posted by Mariah09202008[/QUOTE]

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    stephl3055stephl3055 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    StephieHall had a honeymoon registry, and I think it went over fairly well.  I'm sure she'll give you some advice on which websites to use and which "items" people bought. 

    But I agree with Mariah, register for more traditional items because some people don't get what the honeymoon registry is about or don't like the idea. 

    Also, don't post this on the Etiquette board, they will eat you alive!  :) 

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    fallbride1109fallbride1109 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Oh good Lord no, don't go near the etiquette board.

    I was in the same situation as you and did a HM registry.  I had no idea it would be thought of as tacky as we are both over 35 and had recently merged 2 complete households.  It was very well received among my family and friends.  We registered for excursions and "extras" not our room or flight.  Everyone loved it.

    My MIL's friends insisted on giving me a shower so I also did a traditional registry of upgrades, etc.  If you visit the registry board, they have a great sticky thread of things to register for when you can't think of anything.  I highly advise doing a traditional registry also.  No one wants to come to a shower and watch you open cards.  Plus it will appease those that don't like the idea of a HM registry.

    A big argument that people that are against them make is that they are "funding" your vacation.  The gifts we received made up about 35% of our total honeymoon expenses.  And we would have taken the exact same honeymoon whether we did the registry or not.

    So, in answer to your question, I think it's a good idea if 1) you are not expecting your guests to fund your honeymoon; 2) you only register for extras; 3) you do an actual registry listing the gifts you would like and you really and truly spend the money ON the things you register for (i.e., you don't take the money and pay off your credit cards with it) and 4) you think those that know you would embrace the idea.  Feel free to contact me if you have any questions.
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    Jay+MarissaJay+Marissa member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If you are into cooking, walk around Williams-Sonoma--you'll find stuff you never knew you needed! Unless you got really nice stuff the first time, the pp are right--there are probably some things you could upgrade. Like really nice cookware, a new vacuum, a GPS, maybe other electronics. Have fun with it!

    I think a honeymoon registry is nice too
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    lesalyriclesalyric member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We are in the same situation and did a traditional registry of upgrades. We were planning to register at Home Depot, but realized having recently built a new house, the items we wanted to register for were thousands of dollars (wood flooring, slate tile, etc.) and huge. We didn't want our families to be put in the awkward situation of buy three boxes of flooring to lug to the shower or something.

    We have asked that our relatives spread the word that we would really like gift cards to home improvement stores and also that we have a traditional registry if they would prefer.

    Some people are going to think that honeymoon registries are tacky, some people are going to think that doing artificial flowers, having sparklers for your exit, doing a garter toss, not doing a garter toss, serving a buffet, large second weddings, small first weddings, etc. on and on ad nauseam are tacky. Point being, do what you want, no matter what you do somewhere somewhere will think something about every wedding is tacky.
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    bsn1752bsn1752 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I don't have anything to add, but wanted to re-affirm... don't go near the ettiquite board!! They are MEAN! :)
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    juliebug1997juliebug1997 member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Brutally honest is what I would say.....

    I'm a little old-fashioned so I probably wouldn't contribute to either. 
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