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The pressures of planning a wedding the second time around...vent lol

beautifulmama28beautifulmama28 member
5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
in Second Weddings
For the longest time I've dreamed of planning a wedding.

A beautiful amazing day to celebrate the love I have with my soul mate.

That being said...somedays I wonder what the heck I was thinking...being a 30 something mom of many with a full time job (or two lol) plus mortgage, bills, and trying to find me time?!

Someone that has already BTDT please tell me it will all work out and be a beautiful day lol
This mama is stressing right now!
Christie + Chad ~June 8, 2013~
 CPT & mama to 9 kids, one SIL & a grandbaby girl!
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Re: The pressures of planning a wedding the second time around...vent lol

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    Jells2dot0Jells2dot0 mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    I hear ya. I was living in a different state than my FI due to work, commuting back and forth almost every weekend, working a full time job and a part time job, traveling for work, trying to start grad school, and dealing with my stepdaughters in their teenage years. I just took it one day at a time and planned when I had time to focus. I found that it was a great way to escape from everything else. My DH did not do very much with planning, so it was really all me. I stretched out the planning over almost two years because of everything, so it really gave me something to look forward to and in the end, I couldn't have asked for a better day. It wasn't perfect logistically, but it was perfect for us.

     







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    Sue-n-KevinSue-n-Kevin member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    What exactly in your plans is stressing you out? You've had some good advice above, but as a Michigan/Detroit area bride, who had kids (but only 2) and a really intense involved job, I used 18 months to plan, LOL.

    What do you need advice on, other than how to de-stress? I'd be more than happy to direct you to vendors in the area for some assistance, just send me a PM (Private Message link below) and I'll do whatever I can. I did a ton of DIY stuff, paper products, flowers, you-name-it, and was very happy with what we ended up with. If you want, go to my bio link below and see what we had. If there is anything I can help you with, I'd be more than happy to help. While I grew up as an only child, and only have 2 of my own, I can't imagine what you are going through with 8 kids!

    If you imbibe, have a glass of wine. Make a date with your fiance and don't talk about the wedding. Make (or get carryout) a nice dinner and spread a blanket on the floor and have a picnic in the evening.

    Good luck. I have to say, as a single Mom who planned a wedding, I give you credit and my admiration for doing with a large family, LOL.
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    beautifulmama28beautifulmama28 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_the-pressures-of-planning-a-wedding-the-second-time-aroundvent-lol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:35Discussion:17c9e890-9515-4ac6-b950-aa9fadf1ae34Post:077c3057-34ea-42b3-a8bc-0a0a7cd2ef2c">Re: The pressures of planning a wedding the second time around...vent lol</a>:
    [QUOTE]Take a step back.  Breathe deeply. Remember that this is supposed to be fun.  When it stops being fun and starts being stressful, you're doing it wrong. Sit down, put your feet up, consult your list CALMLY, and consider whether you really need this thing that is stressing you out.  Odds are good that you don't.  If so, cross it off your list. It's not worth the stress. If you do need it (such as dinner for your guests), or just really want it (such as that Swarovski crystal tiara to go with your dress), ask yourself WHY it is making you stressed out.   This may help you solve the problem, or at least set it aside for awhile. Can you delegate it to your fiance?  If you can, do so.  He should be helping you plan. Have you thought about hiring a wedding coordinator? They don't cost the thousands that David Tutera does. Take time - even a few days - AWAY from wedding planning.  Delete the word WEDDING from your vocabulary, and do something fun either by yourself or with your fiance. Remember why you fell in love.  Go for an afternoon with a gal pal. Don't let yourself get stressed out.  When it stops being fun, it's time to stop altogether for awhile. You can always come on here and vent to us, too.
    Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>Thank you :)</div><div>
    </div><div>after some thought I'm wondering if it isn't just life stuff taking away the fun and magic of the wedding planning lol</div><div>
    </div><div>that and I don't know if you read my other post but our reception guy kind of stood us up, def stressed me out because hes already on the invites and i already had it in my head that was the perfect place to have it (its that control issue lol)

    </div>
    Christie + Chad ~June 8, 2013~
     CPT & mama to 9 kids, one SIL & a grandbaby girl!
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    beautifulmama28beautifulmama28 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_the-pressures-of-planning-a-wedding-the-second-time-aroundvent-lol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:35Discussion:17c9e890-9515-4ac6-b950-aa9fadf1ae34Post:a4328dcd-ae96-4b5c-85ea-1d867f56a881">Re: The pressures of planning a wedding the second time around...vent lol</a>:
    [QUOTE]I hear ya. I was living in a different state than my FI due to work, commuting back and forth almost every weekend, working a full time job and a part time job, traveling for work, trying to start grad school, and dealing with my stepdaughters in their teenage years. I just took it one day at a time and planned when I had time to focus. I found that it was a great way to escape from everything else. My DH did not do very much with planning, so it was really all me. I stretched out the planning over almost two years because of everything, so it really gave me something to look forward to and in the end, I couldn't have asked for a better day. It wasn't perfect logistically, but it was perfect for us.
    Posted by Jells2dot0[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>perfect for us, i like that!! :)

    </div>
    Christie + Chad ~June 8, 2013~
     CPT & mama to 9 kids, one SIL & a grandbaby girl!
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    beautifulmama28beautifulmama28 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_second-weddings_the-pressures-of-planning-a-wedding-the-second-time-aroundvent-lol?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:35Discussion:17c9e890-9515-4ac6-b950-aa9fadf1ae34Post:3f3419a5-cb6f-4e23-ad33-1e6feaeaec81">Re: The pressures of planning a wedding the second time around...vent lol</a>:
    [QUOTE]What exactly in your plans is stressing you out? You've had some good advice above, but as a Michigan/Detroit area bride, who had kids (but only 2) and a really intense involved job, I used 18 months to plan, LOL. What do you need advice on, other than how to de-stress? I'd be more than happy to direct you to vendors in the area for some assistance, just send me a PM (Private Message link below) and I'll do whatever I can. I did a ton of DIY stuff, paper products, flowers, you-name-it, and was very happy with what we ended up with. If you want, go to my bio link below and see what we had. If there is anything I can help you with, I'd be more than happy to help. While I grew up as an only child, and only have 2 of my own, I can't imagine what you are going through with 8 kids! If you imbibe, have a glass of wine. Make a date with your fiance and don't talk about the wedding. Make (or get carryout) a nice dinner and spread a blanket on the floor and have a picnic in the evening. Good luck. I have to say, as a single Mom who planned a wedding, I give you credit and my admiration for doing with a large family, LOL.
    Posted by Sue-n-Kevin[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>thank you :)  <3</div><div>I'm doing a lot of stuff on my own...FI has actually stepped up a little in the last week or two and started at least discussing it with me ( I think he finally realized the count down is on).</div><div>
    </div><div>I think the hardest part is none of my braidesmaids except one live even remotely close for one,...two my mom lives 13 hours away, so its like a double whammy.</div><div>
    </div><div>I will keep your suggestions in mind though and if I need anything I'll ask :)</div><div>
    </div><div>I'm located actually a little closer to Toledo logistic wise, but I do go up to the downriver area sometimes.</div>
    Christie + Chad ~June 8, 2013~
     CPT & mama to 9 kids, one SIL & a grandbaby girl!
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    Knottie_22389105Knottie_22389105
    Hello, this will be the second time marriage for us.  For me I don't want to have the big wedding, I've been there and done that. My husband to be has never had a wedding but wants it to be a memorable union for us. We've decided to elope and have a reception to celebrate with family and friends. This way it will cut down the cost for us because we are more into a inimate personable celebration of our love. We've known each other sense the age of fourteen which makes the second time getting married a fun planning for us. It feels good to have the groom participate this time in the planning because for it show's he's just excited about becoming my husband. We have so many good memories of our childhood but for me he was my very first kiss. For him knowing that made him happy because in his words GOD knew we were meant to be together. We had to go through so much with our first marriage to end up years later planning our future together.  
    There's more to our story but if you want to hear more let me know.

    Thaks for allowing me to share
    patience bre
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