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Throwing some ideas around.

Maybeweweremfeo14Maybeweweremfeo14
First Comment
in Second Weddings
This is both mine and my FI second marriage. He had a big one the first time and I had a nevada quicky. So i wanted to have the works this time. We planned on marrying this fall and then having a reception next year. It looks like things are only going to get tighter financially after this winter for us so we are considering having our ceremony this year and then following with a nice dinner at a local restaurant and footing the bill for our guests (it would be less than 50 people total regardless of when). As much as I would love a huge wedding id rather not put us in a financial bind. So any ideas to still make this day special and unique?
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Re: Throwing some ideas around.

  • renjon7798renjon7798 member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I personally LOVE this idea and kinda wish I could convince my FI to do this, but he wants the full wedding experinece.  So, ok.

    I see you're in Northern Cali.  Could you rent out a vineyard for the afternoon and have the full ceremony and recpetion there?  Have a sit down dinner with a wine tasting and perhaps a private tour of the vineyard and winery? 

    To keep it special and to keep the wedding feel you want, perhaps make it a tad bit formal.  Just because you're only having your nearest and dearest at the wedding, doesn't mean you can't have a formal feel to it.  Choose a dress that is made with rich fabrics (although a full on ball gown with a royal train might be a bit much). 
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  • shytownkellyshytownkelly
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I gotta say - in general I don't really love this idea.

    If you want to get married this year - great.  Have the wedding and reception you can afford this year.

    If you want a big fancy reception thing next year - then either wait to get married next year, OR just call it an ANNIVERSARY party (assuming you get married this year).

    But of course an Anniversary party is way different from a wedding reception.

    But the idea of getting married this year and then throwing a big reception (pretty princess day?) a year later just feels oogy to me.
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  • Maybeweweremfeo14Maybeweweremfeo14
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Yes that was my point. We are not doing anything next year. We are instead doing a small dinner with the closet people in our lives at a restaurant. BUT I still want some touches to make it feel special and memorable. Our main issue is money so renting a venue or doing anything on location is out ):
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  • shytownkellyshytownkelly
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Sorry - I mis-read! 

    You are getting married - that alone makes it special.  But you can do alot of the traditional wedding-y stuff at a restaurant.  Like toasts and cutting the cake (or whatever dessert you choose really). 

    Depending on the restaurant - you might even be able to do a 1st dance. 

    Good luck!
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  • lindaloulubbocklindaloulubbock
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Our minister was telling us that where she grew up (Minnesota), a church wedding follwed by apps and cake in the church basement was the norm.  Some churches will even allow you to serve wine.  

    I wanted to do something similar to what you suggested, and I never thought it would be any less special than a traditional wedding hoopla.  Have the ceremony and after-party that suit your personalities, and it will be perfect.
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  • BeccaMichelleSBeccaMichelleS member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    You can also do a brunch...brunches are delcious!  They are usually a little less expensive as well. 
    Places where you can save would be having a small bridal party (less bouquets and party gifts) and less extravagent centerpieces....programs can be cut, and I wouldn't miss favors..and you can save on transportation...
    Figure out a budget in total that you can afford, and work from there.  What are the things that mean the most and will be the most important to you?  You can still do all of the traditional things...


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  • handfast4mehandfast4me member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We went off to a beach, just the two of us.  That ALONE made it special.  We didn't have to pay for a reception, gifts for wedding party, etc. ,etc.  It was just us, and the officiant.  And we even chose a beach based on NO permit required.  The "wedding package" from the B & B we stayed at included the wedding officiant and photographer for $250.  The license was 95.  And we each had our wedding outfit, our rings, and then we splurged on a pewter goblet and a quaiche (Scottish cup) and that was it.  It was incredible--romantic, private, and intimate, and above all special.   We now have the money we saved to put towards the house that we're buy this summer to retire to.  Think about it.  Of all the weddings you've attended, did it make or break the couple's relationship that you were there? That was how we started thinking about it, and decided the only two who MUST be there is the couple getting married.  And there was our answer (plus the fact that DH is an extreme introvert). 
    image Don't mess with the old dogs; age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! BS and brilliance only come with age and experience.
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