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Paper & plastic

keliza82keliza82 member
First Comment
in Wedding Reception Forum
A good friend of mine (obviously) is getting married in July 2011 and wants to use paper plates and plastic knives and forks for the reception "dinner" which is really not a dinner at all. Its going to be cold roast beef sandwiches and pasta salad, etc. Kind of backyard bbq feel. Personally I would never consider paper & plastic and would like to know what everyone thinks. BTW, I'm a bridesmaid and my boyfriend is best man so we were also considering asking the rest of the wedding party to donate money and we would pay for real plates and silverware. I think its more of a budget issue than wanting a casual atmosphere.
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Re: Paper & plastic

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    aerinpegadrakaerinpegadrak member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited November 2009
    I'd be worried about paper being a bit flimsy, but I see no problem with using disposables at a wedding.  That's what our caterer is providing, since they don't stick around for clean up. 

    Costco/Sam's Club carry some really nice plastic dishes and flatware.  FI's aunt served Christmas dinner on them, they looked really nice and everyone thought it was neat that plastic could look so classy.

    Really, it's not your place to be deciding what she serves dinner on.  Who's to say that it's really a budget issue, and that she's just deciding that she'd rather spend her money on something else that's more important to her?  Getting everyone to chip in comes off as kind of judgmental to me:  "The wedding isn't going to be nice enough the way you want it, so we'll take care of it for you."  There's nothing wrong with a casual wedding.
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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    keliza82keliza82 member
    First Comment
    I should have mentioned there is no caterer, all the food is being supplied - and cooked I'm assuming - by the bride's mother so I don't think there will be any nice paper plates. All I can picture from what I've heard is the cheapo blue & white plates or whatever you get from the dollar store. This wedding is on a very tight budget.
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    MeaghanandMichaelMeaghanandMichael
    First Comment Combo Breaker
    It is definitely not your place to say what she should and should not do. Personally, I think having that many throw aways is pretty harsh on the environment and really not cool. Don't organize a plate buying party though. Just sigh and stay out of it.
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    sudsloversudslover
    First Comment
     While I agree with the previous posters, you are sweet to want to help you friend. Another option would be that if you are all local, the attendants could bring their own dishes for use at the reception.  I had a party which had each table serviced with a different set of plates, glasses and silverware.  It was great fun and added a touch of whimsy.
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    aerinpegadrakaerinpegadrak member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    Nice paper plates aren't that hard to come by.  If she's going to self-cater and you don't think she should use disposables, who's going to wash the dishes?  I think a nicer gesture would be doing research into some of the classy looking disposable options available for her.  There are lots of eco-friendly options too.

    If you really want the WP to chip in to cover one of the wedding expenses, I would do it for something that the guests are going to notice more than the dishes, which honestly, no one cares about.  Perhaps you all could offer to cover the bar as your gift to her, help upgrade her photography package, pay for a DJ, etc.  It's nice to want to contribute, but seriously, no one gives a crap what the plates look like.
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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
    First Comment First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its
    If I were your friend, I would be insulted that you thought our paper and plastic weren't good enough and you wanted to spend money to buy something better. 

    When you get married, you can have whatever sort of dishes you like.  This is her wedding, and she will do it however she likes, with whatever budget she has.
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    babylizzbabylizz
    First Comment
    My fam is making all the food for my reception and we're using disposables but they're the clear plastic type that have an etched glass look to them. We will be using plain, clear plastic cups and plain clear plastic, heavy duty utensils. This would be a more formal look than paper and white/colored utensils, also more durable.  

    I got mine at Hobby Lobby (for half off during a sale they were having), but you can find them online too. This is one link...just quickly found to demonstrate, not a recommendation....

    http://www.dontdodishes.com/store/product/294/Etched-Plate-9in-Clear-Plastic-Plate/

    If you want to make a suggestion to your friend, make it gently....I saw these and thought they'd look great for your wedding
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    jenn.danieljenn.daniel
    First Comment

    First, if the food is served at dinner-time, it is dinner.  Sandwiches and pasta salad are dinner.  If they offered waffles and eggs at 7PM, it's dinner.  Second, I doubt they want to wash a lot of dishes after the reception; disposables solve this problem.  I prefer clear plastic plates to paper ones.  You might ask her if she’s gotten the plates yet and offer to go shopping with her if she hasn’t.  You could steer her toward nicer plastic plates, but don’t try to force her.

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    mbcdefgmbcdefg member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker

    I agree that it's going to come across as pretentious if you tell her that you're all buying her better dinnerware. Even though it seems like you have the best of intentions and you're very sweet to want to help her out, I think she might be insulted by that.

    I could only really justify that if she brought up the plates on her own, and sighed and said, "I really wish we could afford something else," in which case you could offer to pay for what she wants as a gift. Otherwise, I would just stay out of it.


    I personally wouldn't like using disposable plates, but this isn't my wedding and it's not yours either. So our opinion really doesn't matter when it comes right down to it.

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    sparklegrumpsparklegrump member
    First Comment
    We'll be doing something similar to your friend: home cooked food, probably plastic plates and utensils. I'm assuming our reasons are the same as hers. Budget. Please respect her limitations. She would probably love to have something fancy, but has other priorities to spend her money on. Either that or she doesn't care. Either way, it's her decision.
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    OneThirdLollyOneThirdLolly
    First Comment
    We are using paper/plastic products for budget reasons.  Our caterer will provide the real thing for an additional $1400 (we're hoping to pay for most of our honey moon with that!).  Our reception is in a renovated barn with a more casual feel and we're happy with the decision.  I had a friend say "Do you really want to be eating off of paper plates at your wedding?" and it really offended me.  This is our wedding and if we are happy with what we are doing, that's all that should matter.  There are so many more memorable things to be spending money on.
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