How Early/Late? (Engagement Party)

mippa · July 2010

My fiance just proposed to me two weeks ago, and we're expecting a long engagement (two years).

The question is, how early (or late) should we start planning/making ourselves available for engagement parties/introducing the parents, etc?

I don't want to get ahead of myself, but I'm very excited and want to get started ASAP!

Thanks a bunch!

waltzingmatilda13 · July 2010

I think you should go ahead and arrange for the parents to meet as soon as everyone is available. It'll be nice to have them meet early so they can hopefully get to know both of you and each other better before the big day.

As far an engagement parties, they can happen any time as well, but don't throw one yourself. If someone wants to host one for you I think it's a great idea, just make sure that whoever gets invited is also invited to the wedding in 2 years. So it might be a good idea to start planning out your guest list now and thinking about what size your wedding is going to be before someone invites everyone you have ever met to a party.

mippa · July 2010

Thanks for the advice! I'm definitely not intending to throw myself a party of any sort (I just...I could never!) but I have people volunteering to do so and want to ask permission and I'm all "--wha? Already?" about it.

I feel kinda bad though. Some of the people who want to throw it...I don't know if we can invite them to the wedding, since we both have such huuuuge families.

If they want to do something, I may just tell them that we should all meet for dinner and forgo the party...?

SuMmErKuTiE · July 2010

Engagement parties are usually thrown at the beginning of the engagement since it's celebrating the engagement and kind of an announcement to close friends and family. Also, it's a great way for the families to meet and get to know each other better. Our engagement party was 2 months after we got engaged and 14 months before the wedding so it was perfect timing for us to have a fun wedding event in the early stages before everything got too hectic and crazy.

If you have friends/family offering to throw you an engagement party but you don't think you can invite them to the wedding you'll have to either politely decline their generous offer or make room for them on the guest list when it comes time to do wedding invites.

mippa · July 2010

Thank you for your advice on the inviting situation. Most of my experience with weddings has been in Japan - and etiquette is a little different there. ^^>

But do you think having an engagement party a 2 years (or 23 months) before a wedding is a little too early?

waltzingmatilda13 · July 2010

I don't think it's too early. You want to celebrate this time in your lives with your family and friends and it's best to do it when everyone is all excited about it and it's new. I think it would be weird to wait, til say a year in, because then you've already been engaged for a year.

loop0406 · July 2010

Since it's an engagement party, 2 months after engagement is good, 4 months before wedding send the STDs and 2 months before wedding, send the invitations.

Kristin789 · July 2010

Ditto Retread.

It doesn't matter how far in the future your wedding will be.

aleighk1 · July 2010

We just got engaged a week ago and my mom is talking about throwing the party in the next couple of weeks. We are also having an almost 2 year long engagement but the point of the engagement party is to celebrate the engagement so you'll want to do it closer to the time you get engaged rather than closer to your wedding date.

bueford101 · July 2010

I got engaged in December and my wedding is finally only one year away now! Instead of an engagement party, we are doing a "kick off party" to get everyone excited again about our big day. Just something else for you to consider.

JMot7 · July 2010

bueford thats a great idea!

I'm about 4 months into the engagement and we always wanted the party but it just never worked out that way. The wedding isnt going to be for a year and a half and a "kick-off party" would be perfect to get people hyped up!

mebywf08 · August 2010

My situation is a little different. I got engaged in February and my friends had scheduled to throw our engagement party in April. I however, ended up in the hospital and our party had to be cancelled. My friends still want to throw the party and we'll probably do it in Sept/Oct which will be about 6 months before our wedding. However, ours is more about our local friends celebrating with cocktails and a dinner party, so I think it's okay. Everyone just wants to get together and have a good time!

pinkstars08 · August 2010

I've been wondering about this subject too. I got engaged on New Year's this year and we have yet to have an engagement party. Here's why: my fiance still lives in Ohio (along with all of his family), and I'm in extreme south Texas (with my family). We're in the transition of him moving down here, but how can we make it so that his family is included too? Is it too late to even have one?

How Early/Late? (Engagement Party)

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