I wasn't quite sure where to post this. My best friend is getting married in August, she lives in North Carolina. I live in Hawaii. Her sister/MOH (and all of her family and a lot of friends) live in Maine. The other bridesmaid (groom's sister) is a college student in VA and in all likelihood would not plan a shower.
I feel useless being so far away and wish I could do more to help her out with all her planning. Do you think she'll feel really bummed if there is no bridal shower? Logistically, I just don't see it happening. Not unless her fiance's mom plans something..and I don't know how to inquire about that without sounding like "Well aren't YOU going to throw her a shower?!". There's no way her family and friends from up north would make it down for a shower and then a wedding. So, does that mean no bridal shower at all? Or should I coordinate with some of our mutual friends in NC to have a little shower with her friends there? And invite friends and family from Maine knowing they likely can't make it? I have no clue. As a bridesmaid, I just feel like I should do SOMETHING!
If I do try to coordinate something, do I split the costs with the 2 other bridesmaids? They are both college students and I know money is tight for them. We (DH and I) are spending over $2500 to attend the wedding (and I am not saying that as a resentful complaint by any means), so I can't afford too much more for her big day, but like I said..I feel useless all the way out here.
Also, dumb question, but are showers traditionally a surprise? Or is it ok to get the bride involved and sort of plan it together, but the bridal party front the costs?
