First Look?

akinal311 · August 2011

FI is sold on the idea of doing a First Look and knowing that he'll have less "posed - us pics" to take after the ceremony (only family pics) and be able to spend more time just relaxing. I'm not 100% on board yet. I want the first look, but want that "special" feeling and look when he sees me walking down the isle. I know most brides choose a first look, and I really would love to do it but need a bit of coaxing from others who have done it and not regretted it.

LauraChristin · August 2011

I'm choosing to do a first look but since I'm not married yet I can't tell you my experience. But there is a fabulous blog post on the groom's perspective of the first look by a photographer that I admire, Jasmine Star. I think you should read it!

I would guess that a lot of brides who are unsure if it's the right decision for them are afraid that the groom's reaction as she does actually come down the aisle will be watered down since he's already seen her. But my experience as a wedding photographer and seeing it happen so many times is that the reaction from the groom as the bride comes down the aisle is less about the way she looks and more about the fact that "this is happening. we're getting married - right now!" She's so far down the aisle from him all he can do is communicate with his smile.

I think it would be bad if you felt pressured into doing it. But I hope that thinking of it in that way, and reading that article make you see it a little differently and then the pros like getting to spend more time with your guests, allowing your wedding party to re-join their dates sooner, etc will be an extra bonus.

Here's Jasmine's blog post:

http://jasminestarblog.com/index.cfm?q=groom%27s+perspective&x=0&y=0

Tanq&Tonic · August 2011

We did a first look. It was one of the best decisions we made for our wedding and I would not have changed it for the world. The prep was a little hectic with little mishaps, so having the opportunity to center ourselves with each other before the ceremony was magical. I can't overemphasize how wonderful it was to have a fully private moment together -- to gather our thoughts, to hug and cry, and to share it only with each other and our photographers (and NONE of those photos have been shared with anyone else). Then we got to arrive at the venue together, and hold hands and listen to the ocean while our families ran 30 minutes late.

I probably would have had a mini breakdown if I had to wait all the way to the aisle to see DH. And I promise, it doesn't make the aisle moment less powerful. There's something you can't take away about that moment either.

100% fan of first looks.

Plus your hair & makeup for those portraits is still flawless!

akinal311 · August 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_photos-video_first-look-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:30Discussion:42f8e90c-3917-4a17-a590-07ef4675c531Post:7113d138-1974-4e3f-9d7a-b16380bde1d7">Re: First Look?</a>:
[QUOTE]We did a first look. It was one of the best decisions we made for our wedding and I would not have changed it for the world. The prep was a little hectic with little mishaps, so having the opportunity to center ourselves with each other before the ceremony was magical. I can't overemphasize how wonderful it was to have a fully private moment together -- to gather our thoughts, to hug and cry, and to share it only with each other and our photographers (and NONE of those photos have been shared with anyone else). Then we got to arrive at the venue together, and hold hands and listen to the ocean while our families ran 30 minutes late. I probably would have had a mini breakdown if I had to wait all the way to the aisle to see DH. And I promise, it doesn't make the aisle moment less powerful. There's something you can't take away about that moment either. 100% fan of first looks. :) Plus your hair & makeup for those portraits is still flawless!
Posted by Tanq&Tonic[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>
</div><div>This didn't affect your excitement when you were walking down the isle? That's what I'm concerned about lol. I want the moment when I walk down the isle to be so exciting too... I don't want the first look to take away from that. </div><div>
</div><div>BTW... such a great article!! I was crying by the end of it!! Just from reading that, has really put my vote alot higher to doing our own first look.

</div>

akinal311 · August 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_photos-video_first-look-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:30Discussion:42f8e90c-3917-4a17-a590-07ef4675c531Post:467731f0-7ebf-41bc-855e-146ea26576ec">Re: First Look?</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm choosing to do a first look but since I'm not married yet I can't tell you my experience. But there is a fabulous blog post on the groom's perspective of the first look by a photographer that I admire, Jasmine Star. I think you should read it! I would guess that a lot of brides who are unsure if it's the right decision for them are afraid that the groom's reaction as she does actually come down the aisle will be watered down since he's already seen her. But my experience as a wedding photographer and seeing it happen so many times is that the reaction from the groom as the bride comes down the aisle is less about the way she looks and more about the fact that "this is happening. we're getting married - right now!" She's so far down the aisle from him all he can do is communicate with his smile. I think it would be bad if you felt pressured into doing it. But I hope that thinking of it in that way, and reading that article make you see it a little differently and then the pros like getting to spend more time with your guests, allowing your wedding party to re-join their dates sooner, etc will be an extra bonus. :) Here's Jasmine's blog post: <a href="http://jasminestarblog.com/index.cfm?q=groom%27s+perspective&x=0&y=0" rel="nofollow">http://jasminestarblog.com/index.cfm?q=groom%27s+perspective&x=0&y=0</a>
Posted by LauraChristin[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>Will you let me know how you feel about it after your married in October? The article really changed my opinion on it... I think we really are going to do it, but just want a personal take on if it made your "walking down the isle" experience any different. </div>

Tanq&Tonic · August 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_photos-video_first-look-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:30Discussion:42f8e90c-3917-4a17-a590-07ef4675c531Post:16bd4645-c5e3-48a7-89c9-6d87d1b56bee">Re: First Look?</a>:
[QUOTE]This didn't affect your excitement when you were walking down the isle? That's what I'm concerned about lol. I want the moment when I walk down the isle to be so exciting too... I don't want the first look to take away from that.
Posted by akinal311[/QUOTE]
I believe, in the article PP posted, from my wedding, and the others I have been to -- doing a first look does not make the moment at the aisle any less exciting. You feel some different emotions, but IMVHO, the difference is that the actual marriage / vow excitement grows and you are less focused on extraneous feelings.

I think you just have to decide what is important to you. OF COURSE it changes your walk down the aisle. You can now focus on walking & not tripping, smiling at your guests, smiling at your groom, your excitement of being his wife, etc. You are no longer worried about whether he likes your dress, or what he thinks of your hair, if he has the right boutonniere, or (for some) bursting into tears of overwhelming emotion. A first look is much more than just "a better solution to scheduling and photos" -- it is really an opportunity to see each other and react in private before the walk down the aisle.

cmp1986 · August 2011

I am not doing the first look. We both want the surprise of seeing each other at the ceremony. I can't wait to see his face as I walk down the aisle.

akinal311 · August 2011

Thanks ladies! I've been so stressed about this over the last day or two, and don't want to be! lol. After reading some articles and some of your posts, I'm going to take it into consideration. I think we have to also think about our timing that day too. Thanks again!

akinal311 · August 2011

My other issue is where we'd have our first look, because there aren't many places around that are that pretty in December and our venue is pretty plain inside.

fallbride1109 · August 2011

I know I'm late but I wanted to add another vote for doing it. It's hard to convince someone who hasn't done it how wonderful it is and how it doesn't take away from the moment walking down the aisle--yet at the same time, once you see each other, all of the stress just melts away. But trust me, you won't regret it. I really wanted a picture of my husband's face when he saw me and I felt like he would be more likely to show that emotion just to me rather than in front of 100 people. My photographer got it perfect:

I have more pics in my bio. Like the PP, we are very happy we chose to do it. But just remember, the moment is special whenever you choose to do it.

akinal311 · August 2011

stephiehall --- thanks so much for posting! Your pics are gorgeous!! I just watched "Something Borrowed" so I'm a HUGE emotional mess but I definitly cried when I saw your pics!! I really think we'll do it... just have to figure out a place to do it at. Maybe the hotel FI is staying at... they seem to have some pretty pics on their website. Thanks so much ladies!! I've seriously been stressed to the MAX about our pics and really want them to turn out wonderful!

LauraChristin · August 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_photos-video_first-look-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:30Discussion:42f8e90c-3917-4a17-a590-07ef4675c531Post:b7463a0b-05fb-467d-aa8a-897c1279a212">Re: First Look?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: First Look? : Will you let me know how you feel about it after your married in October? The article really changed my opinion on it... I think we really are going to do it, but just want a personal take on if it made your "walking down the isle" experience any different.
Posted by akinal311[/QUOTE]

<div>Yes I will for sure let you know! :) I'm glad you enjoyed the article!!</div>

sapphirebouquet · September 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_photos-video_first-look-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:30Discussion:42f8e90c-3917-4a17-a590-07ef4675c531Post:6b263332-f81d-4c3d-9f68-97e2a82b9a47">Re: First Look?</a>:
[QUOTE]stephiehall --- thanks so much for posting! Your pics are gorgeous!! <strong>I just watched "Something Borrowed" so I'm a HUGE emotional mess</strong> but I definitly cried when I saw your pics!! I really think we'll do it... just have to figure out a place to do it at. Maybe the hotel FI is staying at... they seem to have some pretty pics on their website. Thanks so much ladies!! I've seriously been stressed to the MAX about our pics and really want them to turn out wonderful!
Posted by akinal311[/QUOTE]

I'm glad I'm not the only person that felt this way after that movie!

First Look?

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