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Weird FMIL/Flower situation.......

BMSawaBMSawa
First Comment
in Flowers
Would you be taken back by this situation???

My FMIL went to our florist and looked at everything we had picked out for everyone.  She didn't like the selection we chose for her (which was the same as MOB choice) so she actually changed it to a different flower.  Her reasoning for changing it was, "Can't you find these flowers at the grocery store?  Aren't they cheap?"  I found out all of this from my florist.  So she changed it to a more expensive, more exotic flower.  I had no idea she was even going to go to the florist, let alone look through our choices.  Thoughts, what-you-would-do, etc?????? 
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Re: Weird FMIL/Flower situation.......

  • Mryan229Mryan229 member
    First Comment
    Wow, I am am a florist and I have actually experienced this type of an encounter...you are not alone! I actually love when it happens, I use it as an oppurtunity to put her in her place for the bride, haha!!

    I would definitely  say something, that is crossing a line big time, very disrespectful. Let her know that if she has an opinion or suggestion you would be more than happy to hear it, however it is YOUR wedding, so the final decision is up to you.

    Also let her know that was completely inappriopriate, and she put you in an embarassing situation with a professional YOU are working with.

    Stand up to her now, she will respect you in the end, if she thinks you won't stand up to her she will only keep pushing you. I have been in your shoes! I know how you feel but stand your ground, it will work out!! Good Luck!!!!
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  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Is MOG paying for the flowers?  If not, how was she able to actually change the order?  Did she order new flowers on her dime?


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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Ditto the PP question, is she paying for the flowers?  If not then it is time to have a conversation (or your FI to have a convo) with your FMIL. 

    Now if she had changed it to something in the same price range I wouldn't bring it up but since she is most likely costing you more money then a foot needs to be put down.  I would try to work with her within your price point since she really did not like your first selection but if she is unwilling to compromise then you need to tell her that you will be going with the original selection.

    You and your FI need to stand up for yourselves and your choices becasue if you don't do it now be prepared to be doormats for the rest of your lives.

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  • TaraKeeleyTaraKeeley
    First Comment
    If she's not paying, she's waaaaaay out of line. Even if she IS paying, she still should have consulted you before making any changes, and done so without such rude words. Also, did your florist let her make the changes without saying "I'll have to speak to the bride first?" If so, I'd have a conversation with said florist about NOT letting other people make decisions or changes without you and your fiance's approval.

    I think you and your fiance need to speak to your FMIL and explain that these are the flowers that fit with the theme and budget of your wedding, and you put thought into them, that you want things to match, and that flowers will stay as you originally planned. If she's decent, she'll get it. If she puts up a big fight about it AND offers to shell out the cash, I'd let her do that and drop the subject. It was rude, but it's not worth waging a war over because she's pety. Pick your battles.
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  • BMSawaBMSawa
    First Comment
    She is not paying for them.  She saw the order because she asked our florist and wanted to look through it.  Then when I went and met with my florist she told me what had happened.  My florist said that she herself was pretty taken back and it just took her offguard.  We will most certainly be talking to her.
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  • flower_divaflower_diva member
    First Anniversary First Comment Combo Breaker
    Your florist should have asked you to consult your FMIL about what type of flower she would like to wear. Nowdays ,mother's flowers do not have to match and I advise the bride that it should be something that the ladies like or have a sentimental memory.   Be careful what battles you fight..........no one else is going to care if her flowers are different. The florist can make her corsage the same price as your moms even tho it has different flowers in it.
    Unruffle your big girl panties and move on to more important things.  JMO
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