Need dress advice...23 days before wedding

AmyK12 · October 2012

Hi all,

So, I've come here to post because I feel like most of the people around me don't quite understand what I am going through so I am hoping that other brides here will or can get me out of my funk.

So, I'm a plus sized bride (even though I kind of hate that term - why can't I just be a bride? But I digress.) When I went dress shopping, I didn't have a very large selection of sizes to try on...4, 6, 8 were about the average. Obviously, I am no where close to those sizes so the dress didn't zip. The sales lady just kind of held it closed so I could get an idea of what is looked like. Nevertheless, I found a dress that I totally fell in love with. And I still love it today.

The problem is, that now that I have a dress in my size, the dress does not lay very nicely in the back. Let's be honest, I have back fat. I have gone to my first fitting and the seamstress said there is not much they can do to change that. It's just the way the back of the dress is made. But it does not necessarily flatter my back. And sure I can exercise and watch what I eat which I have been doing anyway - but I'm not going to lose that much weight that is make a big difference. I have tried everything to make it work.

All of the my bridesmaids say that it is not that noticeable but I feel like they are just being nice. I am extremely self conscious about and quite frankly, kind of obsessing. I know myself and I know I will worry about it throughout the day. I want to be one of those women who says "screw it...I am who I am and I look how I look. shut up and dance." But I'm just not there. It is to the point that I am dreading the day and I just want to cry. I know I am overly emotional here but...

AND - I love the dress. It is my dream dress. But it doesnt neceesarily flatter my body all that well now that I have it in my size.

How do I get out of this funk and enjoy the remaining weeks until my wedding?

ohemmag · October 2012

Are you interested in wearing a bolero or jacket? Is there any ability to wear a back-smoothing bra with your dress?

AmyK12 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_plus-sized_need-dress-advice23-days-before-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:973cdc6f-961e-4fb0-a628-bef2bb559697Discussion:7a8e4732-6d60-4e49-b990-e0e1d9274b65Post:f4fd80f2-ae29-4ba4-9264-b4e3008f1b3b">Re: Need dress advice...23 days before wedding</a>:
[QUOTE]Are you interested in wearing a bolero or jacket? Is there any ability to wear a back-smoothing bra with your dress?
Posted by ohemmag[/QUOTE]

I have as much of a back smoothing bra as possible. The problem is that the dress dips pretty low int he back. I've looked at a number of jackets and none really do the trick. The top fo the bodice is very beaded and most of the jackets either clash or are too plain to wear with the dress.

Good ideas though. Thank you :)

Stunner380 · October 2012

I know how you feel and I'm using and wrap but I do have this for sell if your interested.

http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_plus-sized_for-sell-alfred-angelo-1646ls-bolero-size-22w-but-fits-like-a-24

QueerFemme · October 2012

Are you wearing a longline bra? If so, pull the bra ALLLLL the way up. As close to your shoulders as it will go. Like, way above your dress line. (so, it's showing above your dress). Then, lace or zip your dress. Then, have someone go underneath the dress and pull the longline bra down. As the longline bra is being pulled down under your dress, your back fat will sort of be pulled down into your dress. It's almost like tucking your backfat into the back of your dress.

It doesn't solve the problem completely... but, it helps tremendously.

entropicbeauty · October 2012

Too late to convert to a corset back? That solves a lot of issues.

AmyK12 · October 2012

Thanks everyone! Love the ideas! Gives me something to think about. I'm reaching the point where I am just not going to care. I am 22 days out and while I may lose a a few more pounds but nothing substanial. I have to figure out a way to love me. My fianace does. So I am just going to stop worrying and enjoying the rest of my planning.

dani1361 · October 2012

i had a similar problem with my bridesmaid dress at my sisters wedding, and i bought my wedding dress earlier this year and saw the same problems in a few dresses i tried. However, a month before my sisters wedding i did these body wraps at a spa, they are around 50-75 dollars each, but you can get them done once or twice a week. It pretty much makes you lose water weight, i lost 7 inches around my mid section making my dress fit a lot better. i only did it once, but you should research it!

hope that helps!!

TheVirginians · October 2012

For the ceremony, have you considered a veil that covers your back? People are looking at your back mostly then, and a veil softens the look of everything underneath it.

Need dress advice...23 days before wedding

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