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Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...

MD2011MD2011
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in Snarky Brides

Money has been tight because of the wedding and my fiance suddenly became very ill.  My mother may mean well by saying she is willing to help out, we all know free money is never free.  So I didn't take her up on her offer.




Then I found out my mother bought herself a gigantic diamond ring to wear on my wedding ***add psychoanalysis here***  Seriously, the ring is 4 Carats!  Mine is only 0.80 Carats.

I'm not angry with my mother, but I am more upset about the forced competition.  How do you deal when someone wants to one-up you everytime?  I never wanted this wedding to be a competition for attention.

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Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...

  • Steph0871Steph0871
    First Comment
    edited October 2010
    holy crap. Are your parents that loaded? oh wait, it's her money. She can do whatever she wants.

    It's only competition if you're willing to compete with her, though.

    ETA: my ring is 'only' a little over half a carat.  Should I not let in any guests that have rings bigger?
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  • SarahPLizSarahPLiz member
    First Comment
    Well, you turned down her money, so she bought herself something. I don't think she's competing at all. Maybe she wanted a ring. 
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  • NebbNebb member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    Is your mom allowed to buy herself a diamond ring as long as you arent currently engaged? Did you provide these guidelines to her upon your engagement?
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    First Comment
    I think you're overreacting, and maybe a little jealous so you figured you'd write her off as being competitive and in need of psychoanalysis. So she bought herself a ring, it's her money. Big deal. No one is going to mistake her for the bride on your wedding day.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:2de17ba3-9a0e-41db-ada1-ec9df013679b">Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Money has been tight because of the wedding and my fiance suddenly became very ill.  My mother may mean well by saying she is willing to help out, we all know free money is never free.  So I didn't take her up on her offer. Then I found out my mother bought herself a gigantic diamond ring to wear on my wedding ***add psychoanalysis here***  Seriously, the ring is 4 Carats!  Mine is only 0.80 Carats. I'm not angry with my mother, but I am more upset about the forced competition.  How do you deal when someone wants to one-up you everytime?  I never wanted this wedding to be a competition for attention.
    Posted by MD2011[/QUOTE]

    JIC
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  • mocha beansmocha beans member
    First Comment
    She has a big ring, but you're the frigging bride in the big poufy white dress.  I think you'll win the one-up contest at the wedding.  Don't worry about it.
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  • amber2123amber2123 member
    First Comment
    I just can't get over the fact that she had nothing better to do with the money then to buy a 4ct ring...I wish I had that much and nothing to do with it.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:d7ce5a23-3e79-4820-8e67-65a99c93f783">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes... : Why do people care how others spend their money?
    Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

    Because clearly every time they make a purchase it's to one-up you. OF COURSE you'd care about that! 
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  • amber2123amber2123 member
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:d7ce5a23-3e79-4820-8e67-65a99c93f783">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes... : Why do people care how others spend their money?
    Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]
    That's not what I meant...I meant that I wish I had enough money to do that.
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  • kd.josephkd.joseph
    First Comment Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:d7ce5a23-3e79-4820-8e67-65a99c93f783">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes... : Why do people care how others spend their money?
    Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

    Plus it's probably just CZ to mess with her daughter!
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  • AllAboutTheBenjaminAllAboutTheBenjamin member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    OP, I think I'm going to go out and buy a 6 carat diamond ring and crash your wedding so I can show you BOTH up.
    panther
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  • NebbNebb member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:e022ce58-84d7-4234-b2a3-c4eaf1de5306">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]OP, I think I'm going to go out and buy a 6 carat diamond ring and crash your wedding so I can show you BOTH up.
    Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]
    dont forget to wear a white dress.
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  • AllAboutTheBenjaminAllAboutTheBenjamin member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    I'll just wear the same one I'm wearing to my own wedding, Nebb.
    panther
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  • NebbNebb member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:ad9b0fe9-f574-4327-80b3-b5133c940f3d">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'll just wear the same one I'm wearing to my own wedding, Nebb.
    Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]
    This is brilliant!! I will crash the wedding too and my husband will propose to me with a 10ct diamond ring. I will show BOTH of you up!
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  • AllAboutTheBenjaminAllAboutTheBenjamin member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:2f4e5cbc-8425-4424-9832-da24d0b447b4">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes... : This is brilliant!! I will crash the wedding too and my husband will propose to me with a 10ct diamond ring. I will show BOTH of you up!
    Posted by Nebb[/QUOTE]

    BITCH! :)
    panther
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    First Comment
    Well I'm going to show all you biitches up by announcing that I'm pregnant. So there.
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  • NebbNebb member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:8a417402-49a8-45c6-b8aa-a232937b4e1b">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Well I'm going to show all you biitches up by announcing that I'm pregnant. So there.
    Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]
    Im going to show up and give BIRTH and my baby will be wearing a 13ct diamond! So there!
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  • AllAboutTheBenjaminAllAboutTheBenjamin member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited October 2010
    This can mean only one thing: I have to show up with diamond encrusted hair.

    ETA - Dammit Nebb.

    panther
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:91dce51e-2376-4056-a3b9-1db92b563d72">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes... : Im going to show up and give BIRTH and my baby will be wearing a 13ct diamond! So there!
    Posted by Nebb[/QUOTE]

    If the baby also has diamond-encrusted hair, then your baby has stolen the show from everyone.
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  • Steph0871Steph0871
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:2f4e5cbc-8425-4424-9832-da24d0b447b4">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes... : This is brilliant!! I will crash the wedding too and my husband will propose to me with a 10ct diamond ring. I will show BOTH of you up!
    Posted by Nebb[/QUOTE]

    <div>Whatever. I will give birth while Jeremy proposes to me. with.... the Hope Diamond. Straight from Rose in the Titanic.</div><div>
    </div><div>
    </div>
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:9d3ebf1d-bd73-4cf2-969f-dac7f4270f61">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes... : Whatever. I will give birth while Jeremy proposes to me. with.... the Hope Diamond. Straight from Rose in the Titanic.
    Posted by Steph0871[/QUOTE]

    Can you also bring Jack back to life to kick Rose in the ass for letting him go? because that would be the best thunder-stealing event ever.
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  • NebbNebb member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:9d3ebf1d-bd73-4cf2-969f-dac7f4270f61">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes... : Whatever. I will give birth while Jeremy proposes to me. with.... the Hope Diamond. Straight from Rose in the Titanic.
    Posted by Steph0871[/QUOTE]
    I dont think my babies diamond ring can top that. I will just start applauding like all the creepy dead people at the end of the movie.
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  • AllAboutTheBenjaminAllAboutTheBenjamin member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:101fb154-96a6-4420-87ad-f8e35b4e5572">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes... : Can you also bring Jack back to life to kick Rose in the ass for letting him go? because that would be the best thunder-stealing event ever.
    Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]


    I'M GOING TO DO THAT.
    panther
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  • Steph0871Steph0871
    First Comment
    Nebb, mine will be 40 carats. duh. I win.
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  • Steph0871Steph0871
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:169c0588-25e7-4cc9-a574-a0b44b06e2d7">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]You guys are such attention whores.  IT'S HER DAY!!!!!!111!!!!
    Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

    <div>MilkDuds for the win.</div>
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  • AllAboutTheBenjaminAllAboutTheBenjamin member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    Honestly though... she's your mom.  She's been around longer than you and has obviously done well for herself.  Who cares how she spends her money and if she wants a damn diamond ring, she's certainly entitled to it.  Are you just pissed she bought herself something after you said no to the money?  That you could have had a nicer wedding instead of her having a pretty ring?  What's the deal?

    My mom's ring is pretty big too.  Her center stone is 2.5 carats and there's a ton of other smaller diamonds around it.  But her enormous ring doesn't make my ring any less pretty.
    panther
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User]
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:169c0588-25e7-4cc9-a574-a0b44b06e2d7">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]You guys are such attention whores.  IT'S HER DAY!!!!!!111!!!! :::stomps foot:::
    Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

    I'm a thunder-stealing whore. Zeus has bestowed upon me god-like awesomeness to one-up every bride I meet.
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  • NatesGirl16NatesGirl16
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_mothers-may-mean-well-but-sometimes?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:19d9e291-e439-4377-a079-a785cefee017Post:9d3ebf1d-bd73-4cf2-969f-dac7f4270f61">Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Mothers may mean well, but sometimes... : Whatever. I will give birth while Jeremy proposes to me. with.... the Hope Diamond. Straight from Rose in the Titanic.
    Posted by Steph0871[/QUOTE]
    Haha, were you watching this, too?
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  • Steph0871Steph0871
    First Comment
    good point AATB.

    Actually, I think my step mom's center stone is at least 2 carats, but she's an incompetent whure so it doesn't count.
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  • NatesGirl16NatesGirl16
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    I'm lanning on wearing my wedding gown (which I HOPE I pick out this week!) to every single wedding we're invited to from here on out.  Fvck that.
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