Community› Wedding Discussion Boards› Plus-Sized
Plus-Sized
New Discussion
Options

Family Drama = Dress shopping hell

Jlp818Jlp818 member
Name Dropper First Comment First Anniversary Combo Breaker
in Plus-Sized

I was so excited to shop for dresses!!! Or rather I WAS so excited.  It has become a complete nightmare.  I'm a plus size girl and a very visual person so I have to try on a dress inorder to buy it ( like most people).  As you ladies know not every store has every size. Luckily I live in a state that has hundreds of dress shops.  So I made a couple of appointments at some stores to see what they have.  Now my problem was to figure out who to invite. 
  My family is riddled with drama.  Everyone hates everyone (almost visiously).  If I was to try to map it out it would take pages of writing.  I get along with everyone (I have my moments with each and I do happen to be closer to some then others).  There was also some huge drama with my wedding party that is still on going. UGH.  
  Now for the problem.  Everyone hates everyone right now but everyone wants to go dress shopping with me.  (my mom, my best friend, 4 sisters, sister in law, 5 nieces.)  They CANNOT get along at all.  If I don't invite someone I get holy hell rained upon me.
I've tried to make different appointments and separate everyone into two groups but that only ended up in me receiving scathing emails from one of my sisters because she said I was being so high school clickish about it and my mom freaking out because she thinks i should just leave out one of my sisters and my sister in law.  I just didn't want fighting and thought that would solve it. 
Damned if I do Damned if I don't.  As much as I don't want to do it alone Maybe I should just go find a dress by myself.  Anyone have any other possible ideas or should I just go it alone. 

Wedding Countdown Ticker
Report Reply to Post

Re: Family Drama = Dress shopping hell

  • Options
    Jlp818Jlp818 member
    Name Dropper First Comment First Anniversary Combo Breaker

    I do, however, have faith that they can pull themselves together and behave at the wedding. 

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    Report Reply
  • Options
    gundy21gundy21 member
    First Anniversary First Comment

    I only took my mom shopping with me at first.  She lives out of town, so we had appointments at 4 salons in 2 days (one AM, one PM each day).  We came up with our top 2 dresses - both happened to be at the same salon.  I went back a week later with FMIL and my MOH (both live in town) and tried on just those 2 dresses for them.  My mom and I had a clear favorite and they agreed with our choice.

    The more people you invite along, the more potential you have for drama.

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Anniversary
    Report Reply
  • Options
    cinderellasjccinderellasjc member
    First Comment

    If you are set on inviting all of them, talk to each one seperately and let them know that you made the decision to invite each of them and if they can "behave" and respect your decisions, you would love for them to attend.  Leave the decision up to them!!

    You have plenty of time to find a dress, don't get too stressed out now!!! Good Luck!

    wedding countdown
    Report Reply
  • Options
    kmmssgkmmssg mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Who do YOU want to be there?  I would certainly not take the entire group as you don't 12 opinions on a dress.  You need one or two from people you really trust.  Stop worrying about keeping them all happy.  Choose one or two and be done.

    As far as those scathing emails, you can remind everyone that THEY can't all get along for your sake to go on a shopping trip and YOU will not tolerate having your shopping experience ruined by their immaturity.

    choose one or two and go shopping.
    Report Reply
  • Options
    i2012doi2012do member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    I agree with PP take who you want to be there with you.

    I didn't want to bring anyone else but my mom. Brining sisters or friends that are around the same age/ getting married themselves/ etc can sometimes be anightmare. They don't mean to but oftentimes they are envisioning what "they" would buy or what "they want to wear" at their own wedding and its hard to have a lot of opinions
    Especially being PS its hard enough to go t here and squeeze into dresses and samples and feel self conscious etc.

    I only brought my mom and it was a great experience for us together.
    www.weddedeverafter.blogspot.com
    167 Invited image 34 Attending image Declined 4 image Still Waiting 129 image
    Report Reply
  • Options
    kmsst48kmsst48 member
    First Comment
    I have a similar situation. JUST my mom and sister(moh) are going. My mother is buying my dress so I want her to have that experience on her own. When we narrow it down or "find" it I'm going to take my girlfriends in and show them. Honestly, I want my mother to be as comfortable as possible since it's an emotional moment, imo, to see your daughter try on dresses. Maybe after the first attempt at trying dresses on you can bring friends to different or follow-up attempts but for the first time, just take one or two people. 
    May 2013 August Siggy: The Hair AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! NO idea! Wedding Countdown Ticker
    Report Reply
  • Options
    timsflower81timsflower81
    First Comment
    I would have had the same family drama so I just took my fi and future step daughter.  We had a wonderful and relaxing experience.  I loved it :D
    My Wedding Pinterest Boards

    image
    br> Anniversary
    Report Reply
  • Options
    QueerFemmeQueerFemme member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    I would consider just taking your mom.  You don't have to have an entourage like they do on Say Yes to the Dress.  It just creates more chaos.

    image

    Websites/blogs where our wedding has been featured:

    http://www.dapperq.com/2013/11/a-very-dapper-wedding/

    http://www.onabicyclebuiltfortwo.com/2013/10/wedding-christina-g.html

    http://4realequalityweddings.com/2014/05/16/g-christina/

    Report Reply
  • Options
    tiffielynn91tiffielynn91 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    I dont know if your dad is in the picture but i took my dad. he actually picked out my dress. 
    Report Reply
  • Options
    Jlp818Jlp818 member
    Name Dropper First Comment First Anniversary Combo Breaker
    Thank you ladies for all of the advice.  I think I am going to just take my mom and future mom in law.  It will remove all of the who is or isn't going because they don't like someone drama.

      Tiffie, i am really close to my dad but I never even thought of that! 

    One thing is for sure I can't wait to finally pick out my dress and be done with it!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    Report Reply
  • Options
    lb1212lb1212
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_plus-sized_family-drama-dress-shopping-hell?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:973cdc6f-961e-4fb0-a628-bef2bb559697Discussion:803a279a-4802-47ae-afb1-885c69d97564Post:764fc926-23ad-4f1e-98d4-669f4e5cc316">Re: Family Drama = Dress shopping hell</a>:
    [QUOTE]Thank you ladies for all of the advice.  <strong>I think I am going to just take my mom and future mom in law. </strong>It will remove all of the who is or isn't going because they don't like someone drama.   Tiffie, i am really close to my dad but I never even thought of that!  One thing is for sure I can't wait to finally pick out my dress and be done with it!
    Posted by Jlp818[/QUOTE]

    Very awesome of you to include FMIL! =)  Also, too many opinions can overwhelm YOUR opinion. We've all seen shows where the bride-to-be loves a dress until her posse of 20 hates it and she ends up leaving without a dress like or worse, getting a dress she doesn't like,
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards