Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions

Dogs or no dogs?

2

Re: Dogs or no dogs?

  • kahaywakahaywa member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary
    We are getting married at his parents farm, and in his family it's a given that the animals will be brought too.  However, we are talking 80+ acres of open space that the dogs are very familiar with, are comfortable with new people, and people who are used to being around all kinds of animals.  They aren't going to be part of the ceremony (the flower girls and ring bearer will be enough to wrangle), but will def. be there.  In your case, I would question how well the dogs do in new/unfamiliar inviornments/people?  Are they trained well enough to let someone know they need "outside time"?  Does the venue charge a fee to allow pets (potential damage and all that)?  
  • In Response to Dogs or no dogs?:
    [QUOTE]Dustin and I have two dogs that are pretty much our children.  One is a German Shorthair and the other a husky.  We try to include them in everything we do, so now with the wedding I'm debating if they should be in the ceremony.  Our venue allows dogs, but they would have to be removed from property after the ceremony.  I can't decide if it is worth having them in the ceremony or not.  And if I do, should I have them leashed walked down with the MOH and BM? Any ideas are appreciated.
    Posted by dietrajade[/QUOTE]

    Yes on the dogs - we had all three of our huskies in our wedding - instead of flower girls, we had the girls walk the dogs down the aisle and everybody loved it.  The wedding was outdoors so nobody was bothered by allergies.  Everyone knows my dogs are my kids and they loved it!!  So did the dogs!  And it made for some great pictures.  If you email me at jenn@appealwork.com I will send you some of the pictures of them, or you can see hegemiermargiotta.ourwedding.com - I am so glad I did it.
    Jenn and Charles
  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    In Response to Re: Dogs or no dogs?:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Dogs or no dogs? : Yes on the dogs - we had all three of our huskies in our wedding - instead of flower girls, we had the girls walk the dogs down the aisle and everybody loved it.  The wedding was outdoors so nobody was bothered by allergies.  Everyone knows my dogs are my kids and they loved it!!  So did the dogs!  And it made for some great pictures.  If you email me at jenn@appealwork.com I will send you some of the pictures of them, or you can see hegemiermargiotta.ourwedding.com - I am so glad I did it. Jenn and Charles
    Posted by jennhegemier[/QUOTE]

    No on the dogs.  Even if they're your "kids," and however well they behave the rest of the time, a wedding is a situation outside their normal routine, where they're surrounded by unfamiliar people, in an unfamiliar setting that may not be suitable for dogs, and who still have to be fed, walked, and prevented from relieving themselves at the wrong time, while still being restrained from running around, scratching or damaging property, and licking, biting, jumping on, and sniffing guests-and that's with dogs that are normally well-behaved and non-allergic guests. And even if there aren't, I would think that most people are too busy focusing on the guests and other facets of the wedding to pay much attention to the dogs' needs.

    And if there's even one allergic guest or the venue has a no-animals rule, the answer has to be no. 
  • It looks like you have plenty of responses - but I'll add my 2 cents.  My fiance proposed with our dog we got when we moved in together.  We love our dog and she is totally a fur child.  However, I know she will have more fun not being at the wedding and is not 100% predictable so we are not including her in the wedding.  However, since she plays such an important role in this stage of our relationship, we are bringing her to our engagement photo session!  I'm not saying she will be in every photo - but this way some professional pictures can be taken with her and it will not be stressful for her with only one new person around... then she can have a blast running around with her friends at her daycare/boarding place during the wedding and honeymoon.  Good luck!
  • Wow, I'm surprised at how many people are down on dogs!  I'm definitely in the minority here, but here's the way I see it:

    I think, if your venue allows dogs, then you should include your dogs - no, they won't see "the significance" of the event, but they will know that they are still with you and that you are happy, which will make them happy.  HOWEVER, if you need to board them and you know they get super nervous in that situation, then it's probably best for the pups to stay at home.  If you let people know that they're an important part of your life and you want to include them because of that, then (sorry for any feathers I might ruffle here) but people should respect that!  

    My dog Griffin is going to be a part of my wedding, as our ring-bearer.  Not only is he like a child to my fiance and I, but he's also vital as far as helping me cope with my anxiety.  We're having our wedding outside, so allergies aren't as much of a concern, and we've told our friends who also have dogs to bring them along, too!  We're having a semi-destination wedding by Lake Superior, and there are plenty of dog-friendly places for people to stay should they want to bring their pooches.  However, our wedding isn't traditional, and we see dogs as being part of the family, and not a hindrance in any way.
  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    In Response to Re: Dogs or no dogs?:
    [QUOTE]Depends on the dog and the situation.  I will be having my dog at my outdoor/rustic wedding.   I am 99.999% sure of how she will act; she will never eat food off the table, she will never run away (even if wildlife runs across her path), she will not be anxious or overly excited and she evens poops on command.  I work in the veterinary field and about 50% of the people there will be vets/techs that know her well and the other 45% are family and friends who are extremely familiar with her (because I literally take her everywhere).  She has a therapy dog certificate and flies on planes.  I am sure she will be fine at a wedding of 150 people since she was stellar around 50,000 people tailgating at Michigan State football games.  I see absolutely no risk with our situation and people that haven't seen her in years are very much looking forward to having her a part of our day.  If you have a dog who you absolutely know, everyone there knows them and you have a place for them, I see no reason to not have them. 
    Posted by lulu4087[/QUOTE]

    But does the dog know everyone?  And does everyone know that there will be a dog there?  And what are allergic people supposed to do?  They cannot be expected to "suck it up" for a dog.
  • I feel you need, have a rehearsal and see how the dogs act. If the dogs are well behaved include them. They ARE family after all. And if the dogs pee or poop the guests will most likely laugh it off. Well, if they aren't prissy. Dogs are amazing and though some feel they will steal the spot light and ruin your day, I feel like you are going to kick yourself in the butt for not trying to give them a chance. A couple weeks before your wedding take the dogs to a crowded place and get them used to being around a huge group of people. Then they won't get so anxious at the wedding. Put a harness on the dogs to keep them from jumping on people, and make the isle you walk down extra wide so the dogs won't feel the need to sniff everyone as they are walked down. Bring a truck  or Dog Carrier so the dogs can be contained after they are walked down, Then you're friend can still enjoy her time with you on your day. Dogs are just like children, unpredictable, but you wouldn't leave your kids at home because they might "act up". No, you would want them to be a part of your big day.

  • In Response to Re: Dogs or no dogs?:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Dogs or no dogs? : No, don't "do what you want" at the expense of the people you want to take time, money, and energy out of their lives to attend a one-day out of yours event.  It stops being "YOUR EVENT" the minute you ask a single other person to get involved.  People take priority over dogs.
    Posted by Jen4948[/QUOTE]

    So what your saying is the dogs' unpredictable actions means they shouldn't be in the wedding, because someone would have to watch them.... So then if the bride and groom had children, they shouldn't go because someone would have to watch them. Same scenario hunny..
  • I'm totally having my 6-year-old dog in our wedding. It's in 10 days. She has been a HUGE part of our relationship. She was the reason I got the nerves to sit close to my now almost-husband because she did it and he was fine with her extreme kissing. He proposed with her sitting nearby. She does everything with us. 

    We decided to take her to a major outdoor event where thousands of people sit out and watch Shakespeare during the summer before deciding. It was a VERY busy year, and lots of people bring dogs, and everyone brings food. She sat on our blanket and ignored everyone but us. There was a very large dog that actually saw HER and came to our blanket and got up in her face to smell her. Testimony to my dog's wonderful attitude, she totally just sat there and calmly checked the other dog out. I have also taken her into a classroom of third graders before, where she allowed 25 kids to gawk at her and then was completely surrounded by 5 kids at a time to pet her. She's just a love.

    It really depends on the dog. I know she'll sit quietly and maybe even lay down during the ceremony. She'll be the best thing EVER to keep me calm beforehand. My brother in law has volunteered to take her home afterward, so she isn't completely overwhelmed by the weirdness. But would I EVER trust my sister's dogs to do something like this? Heck no! They are so different from my dog. The terrier is a monster, and the border collie is slightly psychotic. My dog is like Shadow from Homeward Bound.

    I'd say that you should see if you can test your dog out before the wedding to see if they can even handle being taken out of their comfort zones. I worry more about the dog than the allergies of my guests (Bear won't be around people for most of the day. She'll be up on a stage for most of it). An anxious dog is a miserable dog, which will make you miserable. My dog is weirdly well behaved, and was beyond easy to train. If you take your dog to a park and they start to freak out at everything, they probably won't be good to have in the wedding.

    Because my dog's name is Bear, she's going to be our Ring Bear. ^_^
  • We had both our dogs (A lab cross and a tiny little mutt) in our wedding (we are doing a renewal in 2016). We got married close to home though. Our female dog was the flowerdog and the male (the mutt) was the RingDog-er :)  Our wedding was small (11 people watching!) so it was just my husband, our dogs, me, my mom and my dad IN the wedding. My mom walked both dogs down the aisle and the RingDog-er decided to bark at the steel sheep in the garden at my church... very protective he was. 

    Here's what I would suggest. Find a pet friendly hotel. And hire a dog-sitter. Have them in your wedding and in the photos and then the dog-sitter can take them back to the hotel and shower them with toys and attention. 
  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited May 2013
    Nope, BrocksMommy, not the same scenario, and knock off the "hunny" crap.

    Human beings are not allergic to children.  The children, if they've been potty-trained, can at least be counted on to use the bathroom in the bathroom and won't go on the spot.  The same cannot be counted on of dogs.

    And you know what?  If children can't behave themselves properly, they shouldn't be at the wedding either.


  • Wow the hostility!
    I think if your dogs are a huge part of your life, why not! Obviously it depends where you are getting married and if you have someone to watch them, how your guests feel etc.
    We are having our 7 year old boxer at our wedding. We have had him since he was 5 weeks old and we definitely want him to be a part of our day. We are getting married outside in a field and our reception will be under a tent. Our venue has several cabins that we are actually staying in for the long weekend so we do have a place for the dogs to go if it gets to be too much for them. We definitely are going into it with a plan and all of our guests that are coming would be very shocked if our pup wasn't there!
    Seriously, it's your day. Do what makes you happy!
  • We love our dog, but she had no business taking part in our wedding ceremony.  Although she's extremely well-behaved, the number of unfamiliar people would have overwhelmed and excited her, and she would have spent the whole ceremony wandering around trying to be friendly with guests.  She sees that as her responsibility and would probably get quite stressed out by it.  Please do your dog AND your guests a favor and leave him or her at home.  Everyone will be much happier.

    @MelB1980, if the bride and groom want to have "their day where they do what makes them happy," they shouldn't invite anyone to their wedding.  The instant they invite guests to their wedding, it ceases to be all about them.
  • I actually beg to differ. We have talked to ALL of our guests and they have ALL said "It is your day so you do what makes you happy". They also now how much our dog means to us...I could do without the snippy comments from people who think they know everything.
  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited May 2013
    Sorry, but the needs of human beings in attendance not to have dogs jumping on, licking or biting, or sniffing them or their property, or urinating or defecating on ground they have to move over, or barking during the ceremony or other special moments during the festivities that are not going to happen again, need to take priority over anyone's need to "do what makes them happy" by bringing their dogs.

    Don't get me wrong-outside of the context of weddings, I do love dogs and can appreciate people's desire to have their beloved pets with them.  But dogs don't fit well into the context of saying vows or lots of people present, some of whom may have allergies and who won't be known to the dogs, and not following their normal routines of being walked, fed, groomed, and sleeping on schedule.  So as "cute" as one's "furbabies" may be, I think dog owners do need to get over the "cuteness" and other factors and realize clearly that their wedding just isn't the best place to bring a dog and find other, indirect ways to "include" them then by having them present and walked down aisles.


  • A. I am not having him walked down the aisle. B. He will be on a runner next to our cabin & C. His normal routine doesn't include being in a kennel, so he would actually be MUCH happier with us.

    I am not arguing anymore about this.

    Have a great day!
  • I love my two dogs more than anything but there is no way I would have them at my wedding. I considered doing some wedding pictures with them but as others have pointed out, it isn't worth the headache. We did e-pics with them and used those for our STDs. We are also naming our signature drinks after them (if anyone has some great suggestions for "Jim" and "Walter" we are still looking!). I might miss them for a minute that day but I do not want to be distracted at all from the love I am sharing with my FI and our friends and families that day. The pups will be there when we get home and won't have a clue about what they missed.
  • I just don't understand involving animals in a wedding. They don't understand what is going on, and it's not supposed to be a circus people are attending. It's waaay over my head.
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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  • dietrajadedietrajade member
    First Comment
    edited May 2013
  • dietrajadedietrajade member
    First Comment
    edited May 2013

  • Jen4948 said:

    Nope, BrocksMommy, not the same scenario, and knock off the "hunny" crap.

    Human beings are not allergic to children.  The children, if they've been potty-trained, can at least be counted on to use the bathroom in the bathroom and won't go on the spot.  The same cannot be counted on of dogs.

    And you know what?  If children can't behave themselves properly, they shouldn't be at the wedding either.
     

     
    I really dont appreciate rude people on my thread so you can get off...





    You might want to get off your own thread then, because it's deeply rude to tell people how and where to post on internet forums. It's public space, and telling people what to do and where to go isn't your right.
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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  • dietrajadedietrajade member
    First Comment
    edited May 2013
  • KDM323KDM323 member
    5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    Our dog will be in our official engagement photos.  He's a 98lb yellow lab.  While I love him to bits...he is much like Marley from Marley & Me.  There is no way on God's green earth that dog will be anywhere near our venue on the day of our wedding.  I can only imagine the level of destruction!!!  LOL


    Do engagement pics with your dogs if you like...but don't have them there on your wedding day.
    *** Fairy Tales Do Come True *** Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • edited May 2013




    Part of being on a PUBLIC forum is having common courtesy and  being respectful, just like in REAL life.  And if you can't do this then I don't want to hear your opinion, and yeah that's rude but I treat people how they treat me.  All the people on here acting like a$$holes makes me question why I even joined this site....

    It's very easy to say "I don't agree" without being disrespectful.  And when you say it respectfully it makes me more likely to consider your opinion.  I'm glad I am already apart of a forum where people can like act like adults.  I will take my questions there, even though the site has nothing to do with weddings.





    So, I'm confused. What part about calling people obscene names is courteous now? You are aware that it's bannable to do so?

    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited May 2013
    I wasn't rude to you or BrocksMommy.  You were rude to me.

    And it's not up to you to tell me how to respond.  Adults don't treat other adults like that.  I'm not your kid.
  • dietrajadedietrajade member
    First Comment
    edited May 2013
  • In Response to Re: Dogs or no dogs?:
    [QUOTE]
    No, don't "do what you want" at the expense of the people you want to take time, money, and energy out of their lives to attend a one-day out of yours event.  It stops being "YOUR EVENT" the minute you ask a single other person to get involved.  People take priority over dogs.[/QUOTE]
    I'm sorry Jen4948, but what are you doing on The Knot? You're obviously not a bride-to-be, otherwise you'd have a totally different point of view. I'm pretty sure people EXPECT it to be the bride's event because she (or her family) is spending literally thousands of dollars for the one-day event. It's easy to attend a wedding. It's much, much harder to plan and execute a wedding, all the while being the main point of focus. I don't understand your comment at all. SMH.

    dletrajade- My vote is yes. I would have loved to have my dogs in our wedding- it will be a terrific touch of you and your fiance's personalities. I love your idea of having the MOH and BM walk them down the aisle... sooo adorible. 
  • @DietraJade, I had a very small wedding too (42 people in attendance) and still wouldn't have put my dog, my guests, or myself through the stress of having her there.  She's a lovely, lovely dog, but put her in an unfamiliar setting with unfamiliar people (your guests know your dog, but how well does he/she know them?) and you just don't know how she will react.  I'd rather save my dog and myself the stress and my guests the aggravation by leaving her at home for the day.  She was there with her tail wagging at the end of the night, happy as ever to see us and with no idea what she missed.  If only for the sake of your dog, please reconsider this idea.
  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    I'm doing exactly the same as you.  You have no right to question it. 

    Sorry, but most Knotties don't have the point of view that "it's your day, do whatever you want with no regard for anyone else's needs but your own."

    And in case you didn't notice, 99% of them did not agree with you or dietrajade that having a dog at a wedding is a good idea.  So, what are YOU doing on TheKnot or the Internet if you think you have the right to control what others post or think?
  • mgkennedy said:
    In Response to Re: Dogs or no dogs?:
    [QUOTE]
    No, don't "do what you want" at the expense of the people you want to take time, money, and energy out of their lives to attend a one-day out of yours event.  It stops being "YOUR EVENT" the minute you ask a single other person to get involved.  People take priority over dogs.[/QUOTE]
    I'm sorry Jen4948, but what are you doing on The Knot? You're obviously not a bride-to-be, otherwise you'd have a totally different point of view. I'm pretty sure people EXPECT it to be the bride's event because she (or her family) is spending literally thousands of dollars for the one-day event. It's easy to attend a wedding. It's much, much harder to plan and execute a wedding, all the while being the main point of focus. I don't understand your comment at all. SMH.

    dletrajade- My vote is yes. I would have loved to have my dogs in our wedding- it will be a terrific touch of you and your fiance's personalities. I love your idea of having the MOH and BM walk them down the aisle... sooo adorible. 
    What an asinine thought.  Jen is absolutely correct - if the bride and groom want it to be all about them, without taking their guests' comfort into consideration, then they should not invite anybody.  Once you invite others you become responsible for their comfort and happiness as the host. 



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