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Lei's at a wedding not in Hawaii?

My wedding will be in the pacific northwest.  My fiance comes from a family of hawaiian heritage and his mother wants to incorporate lei's into the wedding.  I'm not really into a tropical theme as I am going for more of a wildflower-rustic look.  Also I should note that my fiance and I are paying for everything ourselves.  How do I respect their culture while keeping with my own vision?


Re: Lei's at a wedding not in Hawaii?

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    Instead of a corsage, she could wear a lei made of wild flowers??? Do Hawaiian men wear leis?
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    Does your FI want to incorporate his heritage into your ceremony? If it is also important to him you could:

    -Some people give a rose to each mother during the ceremony, you could give leis instead
    -The mothers/fathers/ could wear leis instead of corsages (haku are leis worn around the wrist or ankle, they don't have to be the ones you wear around your neck). 
    -Do typical corsages and bouts, but use tropical flowers for FI's family (they don't have to match the flowers in the rest of the wedding) Orchids are often used for leis, and I don't think they SCREAM "Hawaii"-it would be a subtle nod

    I went to a wedding where the bride was from Hawaii-the only nod to her heritage was the chocolate covered macadamia nut favors. Which people LOVED. 

    You could also give your FILs (or both sets of parents) leis at the rehearsal dinner, if you are having one. 

    And yes NYC Mercedes, men wear leis. 


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    edited June 2013
    wosser said:
    My wedding will be in the pacific northwest.  My fiance comes from a family of hawaiian heritage and his mother wants to incorporate lei's into the wedding.  I'm not really into a tropical theme as I am going for more of a wildflower-rustic look.  Also I should note that my fiance and I are paying for everything ourselves.  How do I respect their culture while keeping with my own our vision?


    I think you and your FI should sit down and talk about it.
    I agree it's worth discussing, but it may in fact be her own vision. I pretty much planned my entire wedding and bounced ideas off my husband which he either agreed to or had no preference. So it was basically "my vision" for the ceremony. 
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