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Bridal Shower to be or not to be?

mystakillamystakilla member
First Anniversary First Comment
in Pre-wedding Parties
I am asking this question on behalf of my mother who is giving me a shower....maybe.  We are keeping the number of guests for the wedding low so in turn the number of ladies to be invited to the shower will be low.  I am not having attendants either.  A lot of those to be included for both events are younger, neices and daughters, that dont really have the money for gifts and since I will be 41 by the time the shower rolls around we are struggling with whether or not to have one at all.  My mother said she doesnt want to "short change" me but we don't know what to do.  Should we bother with a shower at all or does anyone have an alternative to suggest?
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Re: Bridal Shower to be or not to be?

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    Blue_BirdBlue_Bird member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    I certainly don't think there's anything wrong with having a shower. I guess it depends on whether the two of you need anything. If you don't, it's probably best to skip it and have a bridal tea or luncheon instead. It may actually be more fun than a shower.
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    MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    You don't have to forgo the shower because of your age. Have one if you want. Make sure there are plenty of items in the lower price range on your registry for those with smaller budgets. Another option would be a girls night out or a bridal luncheon, where no gifts are expected.
                       
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    mystakillamystakilla member
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    The bridal luncheon idea is good...we have been together for nearly 4 years so there is no real need for a traditional registry. It would likely be a personal shower If a shower at all - my mother suggested a gift card shower. I guess we are struggling with the practicality of a shower at all due to my age. My mother and I agree age should not matter but its hard to know what others will think...thanks for the advice and suggestions!!
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    NYCMercedesNYCMercedes member
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    Gift card showers are bad news. Not only is it incredibly boring to watch people open gift card after gift card, it's really just another way to ask for cash.
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    mystakillamystakilla member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    All shower ideas are making me feel like cash/gift grabs...I guess that is my practicality/age speaking. The luncheon idea really is the best if anything at all since your not really asking anyone for anything just their attendance. The only question I have with the lunch is what's the point of getting these ladies together at all when a few weeks later they will all be together as guests at the wedding?  None of us are real party animals to do a girls night out, so I'm starting to feel like skip the whole thing!  Thanks to all who have commented so far...much appreciated!!
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    MairePoppyMairePoppy mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    The only question I have with the lunch is what's the point of getting these ladies together at all when a few weeks later they will all be together as guests at the wedding? 

    It's still nice to get together with your closest female friends and relatives for a relaxing lunch and some conversation. It gives you some extra time with them that you may not have at your wedding. But it's up to you. 
                       
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    shonsgirlshonsgirl member
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    Just my thoughts.  I am 44; my fiance and I have lived together for the past 5 years.  I am not having a shower.  I told my bridesmaids I'd like our close friends to get together to go to a local piano bar that we love - so just a small bachelorette party.  I just don't feel the need to have a shower - I am grateful my friends/family will be a part of our special day and are willing to organize a "girls' night out". There is absolutely nothing wrong with having one if you want it - of course!  It was just my decision.
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    mystakillamystakilla member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited July 2013
    Thanks for your comments shonsgirl...I am still up in the air on this but have time to discuss it w/ family, etc.  Something like what you did might be what we do...just have to decide closer to the date.
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