June 2012 Weddings

Flowers to Mary - Catholic Wedding

I know there are a few Catholic brides on here, so I figured I'd ask (plus on the Catholic board they'd probably flame me).

Is anyone doing Flowers to Mary? I'd never heard of it until we met at the church today to discuss our ceremony and the deacon suggested it. I'm not 100% sure of the purpose, and my first thought "I don't want to spend any more money on flowers", but I told him that we'd consider it. So, if you're doing it, why? And likewise, why not? 
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Re: Flowers to Mary - Catholic Wedding

  • aor9487aor9487
    100 Comments
    member
    We were doing a Catholic wedding, but that ceremony will have to be postponed due to time contraints and schedule conflicts we experienced this year. However, I know that we were just going to do flowers at the alter. Mostly because of money, or lack thereof. 
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  • What is this? You just donate flowers?
  • In Response to Re: Flowers to Mary - Catholic Wedding:
    What is this? You just donate flowers?
    Posted by Megbo2012
    It was explained to me that you bring flowers to the statue of Mary and say a prayer, I think after the exchanging of rings. They sing Ave Maria. Catholics are big on Mary, so from what I was told today it symbolizes the hope in living in the likeness of Mary and the "model family". But, I could be wrong, since I just heard about it this afternoon.
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  • In Response to Re: Flowers to Mary - Catholic Wedding:
    In Response to Re: Flowers to Mary - Catholic Wedding : It was explained to me that you bring flowers to the statue of Mary and say a prayer, I think after the exchanging of rings. They sing Ave Maria. Catholics are big on Mary, so from what I was told today it symbolizes the hope in living in the likeness of Mary and the "model family". But, I could be wrong, since I just heard about it this afternoon.
    Posted by diamondx423
    This is right.  People will bring flowers to Mary. It's usually the bride who does most of the praying.. her husband is more escorting her (but also praying FOR her)... Mary represents the perfect spouse and mother that one should attain to be, so one prays to her for guidance and strenght.  Some people will ALSO go to the statue of Joseph because he represents the strength and commitment of a husband.

    We're doing just to Mary, and FI's cousin is singing Ave Maria (she's WONDERFUL).
  • Tara, we are.  We will present a single white rose with a light blue ribbon tied to it.  The flower choice was a suggestion from our florist, he said that was what he typically puts together for the Presentation to Mary.  I want to it added $5 to the florist bill.

    I think I have only seen it at about half of the Catholic weddings that I have attended, most of which being my family. 

    And in case the Deacon did not explain, it is not actually a part of the Rite of Marriage.  So it is not like you would be skipping over a part of the sacrament if you guys make the decision to not do it.
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  • edited May 2012
    Chels & Tiffany, where does it go? Here is my program layout, where would it fit?
     Gathering and Entrance Rite
    Prelude
    Processional
    Brides Processional
    Opening Prayer 

    Liturgy of the Word
    First Reading
    Responsorial Psalm
    Second Reading
    Gospel Acclamation
    Gospel Reading
    Homily

    Rite of Marriage
    Statement of Intentions
    Consent and Exchange of Vows
    Blessing and Exchange of Rings
    Unity Candle
    Prayer of the Faithful
    Sign of Peace
    Nuptial Blessing 

    Concluding Rite
    The Lord’s Prayer
    Final Blessing

    Recessional

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  • I think it goes after the exchange of the rings, but I would need to check.  I just went looking for mine and the box of programs is MIA.  They have to be somewhere and my mom is now in tears...oye

    When I find them, I'll let you know.  Perhaps try looking on www.catholicweddinghelp.com. I'm off to find the programs!
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  • Okay, potential apocalypse averted. I looked and I forgot to list it on my programs.  I cannot find anywhere that says when it is done for sure. 
    If Chels or someone else is not sure, can you just give your Deacon a call or email him?
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  • In Response to Re: Flowers to Mary - Catholic Wedding:
    Okay, potential apocalypse averted. I looked and I forgot to list it on my programs.  I cannot find anywhere that says when it is done for sure.  If Chels or someone else is not sure, can you just give your Deacon a call or email him?
    Posted by Tiffany6912
    Yeah, I can ask him, I just am still not 100% sold on it.
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  • daria24daria24
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    I grew up Catholic and most of the weddings I've been to have been Catholic, but I've never seen it done. If you dont want to do it, than don't. The wedding I went to last night was catholic and they had a small floral piece at the statue of Mary, but they didnt incorporate that into the ceremony.
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  • In Response to Re: Flowers to Mary - Catholic Wedding:
    In Response to Re: Flowers to Mary - Catholic Wedding : Yeah, I can ask him, I just am still not 100% sold on it.
    Posted by diamondx423
    For what my opinion is worth..
    I have to imagine that it would not take away from anything if you did not do it, because you were unaware of it before and it does not sound like you were absolutely touched in an "omg have to do it" way.
    So, would it add meaning to the ceremony for you and FI if you did it?  If you do not think so, then you probably shouldn't.  There is no point in going through the motions of it if the two of you will not necessarily get anything out of it when it is not actually a part of the Rite.
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  • I like the symbolism, and my mother wants us to do it (apparently my parents did it). How long does it take? Like, an extra 2 minutes? Most of my family gets married outside of the church, or have been married in a different denomination's church, so I've never even seen it.
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  • I have seen it both long and short.  I have seen some kneel before Her statue for the entire Ave Marie.  Others, they kneel before Her for a couple minutes then come back to the front and the music fades out.

    Probably something to work out with your musicians and/or your priest.
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  • I'm doing an offering, but I'm not sure how we're going to actually do it yet (probably won't know until the rehearsal).  I am getting a miniature bouquet of peonies from my florist.

    Although reading this made me go back and look at the program to make sure that I put it in there!
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  • It for sure goes between vows and unity candle. That's where we put ours and that's where we were told to put it.  Like PP said (I don't remember who), it is not REQUIRED. A lot more people nowadays aren't doing it, but I think it's a nice gesture (this coming from someone who was originally against it until the meaning was explained) And why the heck is my tyiping going in italics?
  • My best friend's wedding last June was Catholic and they did not do this. I think it's completely up to you. Do you think your ceremony will benefit from it? You hadn't heard of it before, so do you think, now, it would be important and something you would like? 
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  • In Response to Re:Flowers to Mary Catholic Wedding:
    [QUOTE]I grew up Catholic and most of the weddings I've been to have been Catholic, but I've never seen it done. If you dont want to do it, than don't. The wedding I went to last night was catholic and they had a small floral piece at the statue of Mary, but they didnt incorporate that into the ceremony.
    Posted by daria24[/QUOTE]

    I've never even heard of it to be honest.  No one at my church has suggested it, and neither has my florist, who is also Catholic.  I agree with PPs though that you should do it if it will add meaning to the ceremony to you, if not, then don't!
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  • We are having a catholic ceremony mass and we are giving a flower bouquet offering to the blessed mother. Mary was very important to my grandmother so as a way to honor her we are doing the bouquet. My priest said that we will be doing it after communion.
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  • It goes after the Concluding Right.  My friend's wedding was last year and took her program from her Catholic ceremony.  It fit in nicely there.  They didn't do flowers but a "Devotion to Mary and Joseph" where they prayed at each one.  That's what we're doing to so we won't have extra flowers. 
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  • Our deacon hasn't mentioned it, but we're meeting with him again this week.  My mom was the one that asked if I was doing that, but then she said "well, I don' tknow if people actually do that anymore."

    I'm not planning to do it.  It's not conveniently located in the church, and like you, I'm not really sure of the purpose.  I'm trying to cut out doing things in this wedding that aren't meaningful to us.
  • I am Catholic and Same with my family, and I have never heard of this before. So, I guess, if you want to do it, then do it. 
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  • we are doing it.. bc we are having a catholic wedding and because is tradition in our family and our church. Not everyone does it, but is very important and meaningful to us and our families.
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  • I am a florist and a Catholic, so all my brides who get married in the Church get a little posy for Mary from me.  I love tradition and I love ritual, so it's more for me than the bride!

    www.edensbower.com

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