I'm recently engaged, I've got venues picked, a date set, and I'm starting into the major planning of my wedding. I have two very best friends both of whom I know are going to be next to me on the day (4 maids total). My problem is, I'm having difficulty choosing which one should by my matron of honor. Friend A I've known since junior high. We were pretty close growing up and had a major fall-out when I left for college. After a few years of not speaking, we've come back together and are closer than ever before. Friend B (married) I met in law school, and although we've only been friends for four years (and sometimes drive each other a little batty) she truly is my soul sister. We talk about EVERYTHING, we judge nothing. We are equally supportive, we defend one another entirely, and I'm pretty sure that we will grow old together. If there was nothing else to this story, Friend B would be my MOH.
But there's more to this story. About a year and a half ago Friend A got engaged to her fiance of two years. After about a month, she called and asked if I would be her maid of honor. Of course I was elated (and a little surprised), but she explained to me that I was her closest friend and that her other maids weren't exactly reliable. Boy, was that an understatement. She and I ran into many problems with two of her other maids. We got complaints about when certain events would occur (even the wedding date itself), dress costs, and general non-participation in the prep/planning of the bridal shower and bachelorette party. Early on, I went to her before I confronted a maid myself, but as we came nearer to her wedding, my patience grew thin with the maids. This resulted in them being angry with me, complaining to the bride, and ultimately she chewed me out three days before her wedding. We quickly hashed things out, I was definitely her go-to (and she acknowledges the "right choice") on the day of, and we are peachy keen now all that nonsense is over.
That was two months ago. Now that I'm engaged, I'm very torn. The wound between Friend A and me is still healing, and I think asking her to be my MOH will not only speed the healing process, but I feel like there's almost an expectation that I ask her. On the other hand, if Friend A had never chosen me as her MOH, there would be no question that Friend B would be the one and only. My fiance and I agree that asking two of four bridesmaids to be my MOH would be awkward, so it's a "1 or none" situation. Should I make a choice, or should I play the "you're all important to me" card and delegate duties as they come along?