My H was asked to be a groomsmen in a wedding. Yay! Our STD came, we
booked flights and an extra night at the (expensive) hotel so we could
make the rehearsal. It is a Thursday and we are taking off from work to
make it. H spent $190 (after a $40 off coupon) to rent a tux for the
day. When H gets back from the bachelor party, he tells me the happy
couple is actually getting married next week, and the thing we are
invited to is an after the fact celebration. Well, that's cool, except
1.
Why does H need to spend almost $200 on a tux to be a groomsmen for a
wedding he isn't attending? He just paid all that money to wear a tux
for a party, lame.
2. We took time off from work to make the
rehearsal and make sure we were in the same hotel as the groom, in case
he was feeling jittery and wanted to friends to hang out with. Wouldn't
mind doing it, but we aren't doing it. Instead, we took time off and are
spending money to rehearse a wedding that already happened and hang out
with someone who shouldn't have any pre-wedding jitters because it is
post-wedding.
If we had known this from the get-go, we could have
saved $400 and a day-off from work. Are we still going to the party?
Yep, we are happy for the happy couple and want to celebrate with them.
Are we going to bitch about it? Not to them, not worth calling out a
friend for decades over $400 and a wasted day off. All that being said, I
am incredibly surprised and disappointed that they didn't think about
their plans enough to realize how they would make us feel, and right
now, the word prop and inconvenienced come to mind. I was really looking
forward to their wedding, and now I feel like we've spent a lot of
money to be disappointed. It is such a let down.
Just thought I'd
share in case anyone else was thinking it would be okay to JOP it
before the "wedding" so long as everyone invited knew. I wish we knew
before we made plans, rented attire, booked travel, and so on. Finding
out after the money was spent but before the "wedding" feels like a bait
and switch. It is disappointing, and doesn't feel nice at all.