Wedding Party

MOH issues

I have 2 MOHs, which consequently makes up my entire wedding party, along with FI's 2 best friends as the best men.  I chose my sister, who is 10 years younger than me, and a very close friend.  My younger sister is actually being more of a MOH than the friend that is my age... but the problem I'm having here is that my friend and I have very different tastes in clothes, makeup, etc.  My wedding has a very vintage and rustic feel, as that reflects FI's and my style.  My MOH is very... let's say sparkly.  I'm not a girly girl, I never got into body glitter in high school, I would feel ridiculous wearing metallic eyeliner on a daily basis... and she probably still has body glitter hidden away somewhere.  

She has mentioned a few times that she wants us all to get our makeup done at the MAC counter for my wedding... every time I give a brush off answer, she just talks about how much she loves the MAC counter and wants the whole shebang for her makeup.  I'm not trying to be a control freak here; I of course want my girls to be comfortable and feel gorgeous in whatever makeup they choose to wear, but I am really not wanting her to go with the whole over-the-top glitter/metallic/clubby makeup look.  I just feel like it's tacky, and so not in line with the style FI and I are creating for our wedding. Any suggestions on how to gently steer her towards a more classy, natural look?

Re: MOH issues

  • Perhaps you can hire someone to do makeup for the bridal party and the moms and have that person bring only "calmer" styles.  It would sidestep the issue.  . 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Her makeup on your wedding day will have no affect what-so-ever on your vintage theme.  In fact, unless she is rocking some neon eye shadow and a shit ton of glitter to resemble someone dressing up for halloween then none of your guests will notice nor care that her makeup isn't vintagey enough for your wedding.

    I also agree with missax.  For my friends wedding she hired two girls from MAC to come and do our makeup.  None of us looked like we were getting ready to go to a club.  The MAC girls knew what color and kind of dress we were wearing and matched our makeup accordingly.

  • This is a non-issue. Her make-up has nothing to do with your wedding. If chooses to get a butterfly on her face, it's not going to make a difference in whether or not you get married or if your wedding is vintage/rustic or not. I think if try to "gently steer" her in one direction or another it'll come off as condescending like she isn't capable of picking out her own make up. KWIM?
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  • I have 2 MOHs, which consequently makes up my entire wedding party, along with FI's 2 best friends as the best men.  I chose my sister, who is 10 years younger than me, and a very close friend.  My younger sister is actually being more of a MOH than the friend that is my age... but the problem I'm having here is that my friend and I have very different tastes in clothes, makeup, etc.  My wedding has a very vintage and rustic feel, as that reflects FI's and my style.  My MOH is very... let's say sparkly.  I'm not a girly girl, I never got into body glitter in high school, I would feel ridiculous wearing metallic eyeliner on a daily basis... and she probably still has body glitter hidden away somewhere.  

    She has mentioned a few times that she wants us all to get our makeup done at the MAC counter for my wedding... every time I give a brush off answer, she just talks about how much she loves the MAC counter and wants the whole shebang for her makeup.  I'm not trying to be a control freak here; I of course want my girls to be comfortable and feel gorgeous in whatever makeup they choose to wear, but I am really not wanting her to go with the whole over-the-top glitter/metallic/clubby makeup look.  I just feel like it's tacky, and so not in line with the style FI and I are creating for our wedding. Any suggestions on how to gently steer her towards a more classy, natural look?
    Come on regs! Gotta quote ;-)

    OP, I love doing my own make up and getting my make up done, and I also love some sparkle in my life.  That being said, I am perfectly capable of choosing appropriate make up for whatever occasion I happen to be going out to.  Just because your friends' choose a different style look than you, does not mean it is inappropriate for your wedding or would clash with your look.

    BTW, vintage and rustic don't really fit together thematically. . . they are two different looks visually, but that might just be me.

    I think that if you were to try and "steer" your friends into doing their make-up a certain way, no matter how gently you think you are coming across, you are going to offend them.

    And if you want them to wear their makeup a certain way, then you have to pay for it.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • I used the MAC counter for an event a few weeks ago. They went very natural and it looked beautiful with my ball gown. I wouldn't worry too much about it. They know what is appropriate. Of course, if your friend demands hot pink sparkly shadow, they likely won't refuse her.
    "There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness." -Friedrich Nietzsche, "On Reading and Writing"
  • if you want makeup done a certain way, you have to pay for it.  otherwise, she is free to do whatever she wants.  her makeup will not ruin your day.  also, she is not a prop, she is a person.  she doesn't have to fit into your theme.

     

    I'm sure she'll show a picture of the dress to the MAC girls and they will apply makeup accordingly.

  • delujm0 said:

    if you want makeup done a certain way, you have to pay for it. And she has to agree to it. For example, if I was a BM and the bride was like "I want you to have a butterfly on your face...don't worry, I'm paying for it" I would be like "sorry darlin', I love you, but I cannot have a butterfly painted on my face" otherwise, she is free to do whatever she wants.  her makeup will not ruin your day.  also, she is not a prop, she is a person.  she doesn't have to fit into your theme.

    I'm sure she'll show a picture of the dress to the MAC girls and they will apply makeup accordingly.

    Otherwise, I agree with all of this. :)
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  • delujm0 said:

    if you want makeup done a certain way, you have to pay for it. And she has to agree to it. For example, if I was a BM and the bride was like "I want you to have a butterfly on your face...don't worry, I'm paying for it" I would be like "sorry darlin', I love you, but I cannot have a butterfly painted on my face" otherwise, she is free to do whatever she wants.  her makeup will not ruin your day.  also, she is not a prop, she is a person.  she doesn't have to fit into your theme.

    I'm sure she'll show a picture of the dress to the MAC girls and they will apply makeup accordingly.

    Otherwise, I agree with all of this. :)

    hahahaha...if i was a BM and the bride told me i had to have a butterfly painted on my face, i would tell her we were no longer friends and remove myself from that situation ASAP. :-)



  • I have 2 MOHs, which consequently makes up my entire wedding party, along with FI's 2 best friends as the best men.  I chose my sister, who is 10 years younger than me, and a very close friend.  My younger sister is actually being more of a MOH than the friend that is my age... but the problem I'm having here is that my friend and I have very different tastes in clothes, makeup, etc.  My wedding has a very vintage and rustic feel, as that reflects FI's and my style.  My MOH is very... let's say sparkly.  I'm not a girly girl, I never got into body glitter in high school, I would feel ridiculous wearing metallic eyeliner on a daily basis... and she probably still has body glitter hidden away somewhere.  

    She has mentioned a few times that she wants us all to get our makeup done at the MAC counter for my wedding... every time I give a brush off answer, she just talks about how much she loves the MAC counter and wants the whole shebang for her makeup.  I'm not trying to be a control freak here; I of course want my girls to be comfortable and feel gorgeous in whatever makeup they choose to wear, but I am really not wanting her to go with the whole over-the-top glitter/metallic/clubby makeup look.  I just feel like it's tacky, and so not in line with the style FI and I are creating for our wedding. Any suggestions on how to gently steer her towards a more classy, natural look?
    Come on regs! Gotta quote ;-)

    OP, I love doing my own make up and getting my make up done, and I also love some sparkle in my life.  That being said, I am perfectly capable of choosing appropriate make up for whatever occasion I happen to be going out to.  Just because your friends' choose a different style look than you, does not mean it is inappropriate for your wedding or would clash with your look.

    BTW, vintage and rustic don't really fit together thematically. . . they are two different looks visually, but that might just be me.

    I think that if you were to try and "steer" your friends into doing their make-up a certain way, no matter how gently you think you are coming across, you are going to offend them.

    And if you want them to wear their makeup a certain way, then you have to pay for it.
    I didn't say I wasn't paying for it.  In fact, I am paying for it, along with her dress. 

    No, I don't think her makeup is going to ruin my day, but this particular friend is known for her tacky taste, and her usual makeup is over the top.  I guess I'm more conservative and that's my concern. 

    Re: vintage and rustic... I'm not creating a set theme for my wedding, but taking cues from both vintage styles and rustic notes. I'm from Michigan, can't get more rustic than that.  I take it you've never been in the store Anthropologie. 

    Thanks everyone for your snarky answers!! 
  • There's actually a minimum of snark in this thread. 
  • edited September 2013






    I have 2 MOHs, which consequently makes up my entire wedding party, along with FI's 2 best friends as the best men.  I chose my sister, who is 10 years younger than me, and a very close friend.  My younger sister is actually being more of a MOH than the friend that is my age... but the problem I'm having here is that my friend and I have very different tastes in clothes, makeup, etc.  My wedding has a very vintage and rustic feel, as that reflects FI's and my style.  My MOH is very... let's say sparkly.  I'm not a girly girl, I never got into body glitter in high school, I would feel ridiculous wearing metallic eyeliner on a daily basis... and she probably still has body glitter hidden away somewhere.  

    She has mentioned a few times that she wants us all to get our makeup done at the MAC counter for my wedding... every time I give a brush off answer, she just talks about how much she loves the MAC counter and wants the whole shebang for her makeup.  I'm not trying to be a control freak here; I of course want my girls to be comfortable and feel gorgeous in whatever makeup they choose to wear, but I am really not wanting her to go with the whole over-the-top glitter/metallic/clubby makeup look.  I just feel like it's tacky, and so not in line with the style FI and I are creating for our wedding. Any suggestions on how to gently steer her towards a more classy, natural look?

    Come on regs! Gotta quote ;-)

    OP, I love doing my own make up and getting my make up done, and I also love some sparkle in my life.  That being said, I am perfectly capable of choosing appropriate make up for whatever occasion I happen to be going out to.  Just because your friends' choose a different style look than you, does not mean it is inappropriate for your wedding or would clash with your look.

    BTW, vintage and rustic don't really fit together thematically. . . they are two different looks visually, but that might just be me.

    I think that if you were to try and "steer" your friends into doing their make-up a certain way, no matter how gently you think you are coming across, you are going to offend them.

    And if you want them to wear their makeup a certain way, then you have to pay for it.

    I didn't say I wasn't paying for it.  In fact, I am paying for it, along with her dress. 

    No, I don't think her makeup is going to ruin my day, but this particular friend is known for her tacky taste, and her usual makeup is over the top.  I guess I'm more conservative and that's my concern. 

    Re: vintage and rustic... I'm not creating a set theme for my wedding, but taking cues from both vintage styles and rustic notes. I'm from Michigan, can't get more rustic than that.  I take it you've never been in the store Anthropologie. 

    Thanks everyone for your snarky answers!! 


    Actually, no one was being snarky. We just weren't validating your desire to ask your friends to do their make up how you want them to. That's awesome you are paying for their dresses and make up. . .just trust your MUA to do a great job.


    I have been in Anthropologie, awesome store. . .but to me its trendy and yuppie, not rustic. Nothing wrong with trendy and yuppie!



    Rustic to me is an old barn, a cabin in the middle of no where, and vintage is Victorian to maybe the 1920s, but I think that is technically Art Deco. Some ppl refer to 40s and 50s looks as vintage.


    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • No one was snarky with you.

    I agree with PrettyGirlLost.  I have been into an Anthropologie store and nothing about it screams rustic/vintage.  When I think rustic I think of an old barn, mason jars, daisies while vintage screams lace, pale colors and non matching china and glassware.

    As far as your MOH's makeup goes.  Ok, you don't like how she does her makeup, well it is her face and it isn't like she is forcing you at gun point to wear your makeup the same way.  And since you already know that it will have no affect on your wedding day then why are you still concerned about it?

    I guess since you are paying for it you could tell the MUA ahead of time that you would prefer for your girls to have more subtle makeup but if it were me I would rather have my MOH be happy and feel beautiful in the makeup she likes rather then force her into a subtle makeup covered face and her be pissy about it.

  • Paying for it or not, controlling her make-up is ridiculous.  You are getting married, not queen of the universe.  

    The sooner you realize that some things are out of your control, the better.  Stop trying to micromanage everything.  


  • I have 2 MOHs, which consequently makes up my entire wedding party, along with FI's 2 best friends as the best men.  I chose my sister, who is 10 years younger than me, and a very close friend.  My younger sister is actually being more of a MOH than the friend that is my age... but the problem I'm having here is that my friend and I have very different tastes in clothes, makeup, etc.  My wedding has a very vintage and rustic feel, as that reflects FI's and my style.  My MOH is very... let's say sparkly.  I'm not a girly girl, I never got into body glitter in high school, I would feel ridiculous wearing metallic eyeliner on a daily basis... and she probably still has body glitter hidden away somewhere.  

    She has mentioned a few times that she wants us all to get our makeup done at the MAC counter for my wedding... every time I give a brush off answer, she just talks about how much she loves the MAC counter and wants the whole shebang for her makeup.  I'm not trying to be a control freak here; I of course want my girls to be comfortable and feel gorgeous in whatever makeup they choose to wear, but I am really not wanting her to go with the whole over-the-top glitter/metallic/clubby makeup look.  I just feel like it's tacky, and so not in line with the style FI and I are creating for our wedding. Any suggestions on how to gently steer her towards a more classy, natural look?
    Come on regs! Gotta quote ;-)

    OP, I love doing my own make up and getting my make up done, and I also love some sparkle in my life.  That being said, I am perfectly capable of choosing appropriate make up for whatever occasion I happen to be going out to.  Just because your friends' choose a different style look than you, does not mean it is inappropriate for your wedding or would clash with your look.

    BTW, vintage and rustic don't really fit together thematically. . . they are two different looks visually, but that might just be me.

    I think that if you were to try and "steer" your friends into doing their make-up a certain way, no matter how gently you think you are coming across, you are going to offend them.

    And if you want them to wear their makeup a certain way, then you have to pay for it.
    I didn't say I wasn't paying for it.  In fact, I am paying for it, along with her dress. 

    No, I don't think her makeup is going to ruin my day, but this particular friend is known for her tacky taste, and her usual makeup is over the top.  I guess I'm more conservative and that's my concern. 

    Re: vintage and rustic... I'm not creating a set theme for my wedding, but taking cues from both vintage styles and rustic notes. I'm from Michigan, can't get more rustic than that.  I take it you've never been in the store Anthropologie. 

    Thanks everyone for your snarky answers!! 
    Whiny diva, table for one.



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