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Brothers Getting Married: Is there etiquette for this?

southernredandwhite85southernredandwhite85 member
First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
My fiance's brother and his girlfriend are getting married 4 months after us. Their uncles want to throw a party for the four of us so that family friends can meet us. It isn't a shower or an engagement party, but a get-together. There are folks who will be invited to their wedding and not ours and vice versa. What's the etiquette here? I know that anyone invited to pre-wedding parties/events must be invited to the wedding. Everyone invited to this party will be invited to the wedding - just not necessarily both weddings. Thoughts?
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Re: Brothers Getting Married: Is there etiquette for this?

  • Vivandiere8Vivandiere8 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    I really think it's covered under the fact that thy are coming because of the couple who's wedding they are going to be invited to. You don't need to invite everyone else who is going to your brothers wedding simply because they are attending that event.
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  • photokittyphotokitty mod
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Who are the guests that won't be invited to both?
    If they are yours and the other bride's immediate families (parents, siblings and SOs) I think it is fine. I would not invite any friends or WP. If it is a family party for the grooms' family to meet the future in laws then that's fine.
    This assumes you are inviting all of the grooms family that will be there and the same is said for the other wedding.
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

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  • smalfrie19smalfrie19 member
    Combo Breaker First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its
    aefowler said:
    My fiance's brother and his fiancee are getting married 4 months after us. Their uncles want to throw a party for the four of us so that family friends can meet us. It isn't a shower or an engagement party, but a get-together. There are folks who will be invited to their wedding and not ours and vice versa. What's the etiquette here? I know that anyone invited to pre-wedding parties/events must be invited to the wedding. Everyone invited to this party will be invited to the wedding - just not necessarily both weddings. Thoughts?
    FTFY
    Anniversary
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  • southernbelle0915southernbelle0915 mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    It doesn't sound like a pre-wedding party to me (since it's not a shower and it's not an engagement party). It sounds like a family get together. As long as the uncle keeps the wedding out of it and stays on the family get-together track, I see no issues with this at all.
    *********************************************************************************

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  • southernredandwhite85southernredandwhite85 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    The guests that won't be invited to both are some of the brothers' parents' friends. We have a ~300 guest list while his brother has ~150 on theirs so other than family our guest lists look differently. As an example, FI's parents are great friends with 3 couples and we can accommodate them to our wedding, but FI's brother can't because of size restrictions of their venue. It would defeat the purpose of a "meet the girls" get together if they had to limit the guest list only to those invited to both because that'd essentially be family & they really want it to be a family friends type of party. Hope that makes sense!

    Oops - I still slip up with the girlfriend/boyfriend v. fiance terminology!
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  • s-aries8990s-aries8990 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    I think that if uncle can keep it as a non-wedding-related party, like an open house, then you're fine.
     Daisypath Anniversary tickers
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    s-aries8990 said:
    I think that if uncle can keep it as a non-wedding-related party, like an open house, then you're fine.
    This.
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  • SomethingBeautiful08SomethingBeautiful08 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    I don't see an issue with this assuming it is an open house, "meet the brides" type party.
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  • melbelleupmelbelleup member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment First Answer
    s-aries8990 said:
    I think that if uncle can keep it as a non-wedding-related party, like an open house, then you're fine.
    Agreed with this. Luckily my brother's parties and my parties are kept separate :) but my brother is getting married 3 weeks after me. It's been interesting planning.
    Daisypath Wedding tickers
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  • MrsAitchMrsAitch member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    My fiance's brother is getting married 3 months after we are as well and it does make planning interesting--I really feel like we have to coordinate guest lists or something.

    I think the party your family is planning sounds fine and more like a family gathering than a wedding related event.
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  • southernredandwhite85southernredandwhite85 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    Awesome! My fiance's mom asked me about the etiquette and clearly I came straight to this board. I feel much better giving her the confirmation that an "open house" type party is the way to go. Thanks!
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