LAWD LAWD LAWD...HES BACK!!

tirathemrs · October 2013

minsu5 sultryzulu VOICE WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN????

minsu5 · October 2013

Where have I been?

Bouncing between work and law school. I'm an evening student and I'm in my last year. This semester, I am in the community development clinic, where I represent local small businesses and nonprofits. I love being a student attorney, but it requires a 20 hour/week time commitment. In addition to my fulltime good-gov't-job, I'm pulling 60 hours a week of work. Like some of you, even my classmates have asked, "Where's Douglas this semester? Did he graduate? Is he still here?" Many are used to seeing me on campus because I was very involved in student life. However, my involvement have waned; my outlook has changed. I'm focusing on three things: wedding, graduation, and finding new employment.

Meanwhile, wedding planning has been going pretty slow. We are about 7 months away from the big day. We've already completed the big jobs of securing venue, wedding cake, and (for me) fitting for my custom tux at Christopher Schafers. Earlier this week, I purchased my new wedding band. I've been avoiding going to the florist, but I may tackle that in the near future.

My FI is doing well. He's also slacking off in the wedding dept, still searching for his tux. I'm waiting for him to finalize a deal with his childhood friend/professional wedding photographer. He also has some family issues; he invited all his aunts but not his uncles to the wedding. Someone later guilt trip him into inviting them. I said, do what you want but your family has only one table (10 guests).

Speaking of family, I finally decided to invite my sister to my wedding. For a while, I didn't want to invite anyone from my family. Long story short, I had a terrible, dramatic coming out experience when I was 17. Ever since then, I kept my friends and family in separate, distinct spheres in my life. When I could, I moved out of my family's home after graduating college. No one but my sister has met my E. I don't want my wedding to become another coming out event, and I certainly don't want it to be a meet & greet between my family and his (at $150/person, ain't nobody got time for dat!).

I changed my mind after going to my future mother-in-law's third wedding. She married her old friend, the Deacon. My FI and his brother escorted their mother to the alter. My FI's grandmother, suffering with dementia, was seated at the front, watching her daughter marry. I was sitting in the pew, watching the ceremony, and I thought "Who will sit at my wedding's front row?" We aren't assigning particular sides for guests, but there's still the front row. I know E's mom gotta sit there, but I can't do the same. My mother died when I was three and my father, a devout Jehovah Witness, cannot say the word "gay." I only have one sister and we are not close. Never have and never will. But, she's the only person I have in my family that knew my FI and had apologize for her behavior when I came out. I decided to invite her and one of my open minded cousins to be her company (he saw my engagement and said he wanted to come - likely just to hit on the single straight women).

Today, I was thinking how much I have been away from TK. I need a break from my day-to-day responsibilities. I thank all of you for your support and I will try to be a more frequent contributor.

[Deleted User] · October 2013

This whole post tore me up. However often, im glad youre around, missed ya! *smooch*

M1ssJ · October 2013

wait I missed when you joined @minsu5 !!!! Hey!

minsu5 · October 2013

@sultryzulu I missed you too!

@M1ssJ, I joined some months ago and then I got away around late August - now.

cidefi · October 2013

Well its nice to meet you. And I guess welcome back is order :-)

marsm4 · October 2013

@minsu5, we have some things in common. My parents are JW's and won't even acknowledge my engagement and also declined to attend my wedding along with an aunt and uncle I was once close too. That's the reason it's so important for me to have my sister there AND on time. She's one of the few family members that are supporting me. All of my FI's family is coming from out of town to attend. He'll have more family there than me. It's a little embarrassing for me... Anyway, sorry I got carried off on me. I'm glad you'll be here more often now, you were missed :-)

tirathemrs · October 2013

Awwwww @minsu5 seems like you have your hands and mind full sorry love! You know we are here for you if you need to chat,vent or whatever..... As for your family I can only say in time I'm hoping they will come around and if you need some extra sisters on that front row we are here all we ask for is cake lol lol....yes dear you have truly been missed welcome back

LeciaB · October 2013

@minsu5 you are a busy guy... But I'm glad that you are back

also glad that you got all those checks done in between your extra busy life .. lol that is awesome that you are going to invite the sister .. Chile I understand about those extra people trying to make it to the reception ... One table per family is the way to go lol

Soon to Be Mrs Jay · October 2013

@minsu5 Welcome back!! You are a very busy person. The fact that people are missing you at school shows you have placed a special mark on people lives. That is such a great trait to have. Your tux is going to be SHARP. Sharp as a knife. I saw some of Christopher Schafers work at a bridal showcase at The MD Zoo last weekend. I was impressed. Glad you are able to forgive your sister and allow her to be a part of your day. I pray that your day is a blessing to you and E, and also to all your guest.

Now do not stay away so long. Come pass often and say hello to us over here on TK.

minsu5 · October 2013

@marsm4, I understand the imbalance and now I have a greater appreciation for your sister. I hope she can arrive on time. Maybe you can deputize someone to be one "sister" duty so that you don't have to. I'm still trying to come up with ideas.

@misstira, thank you, I'll keep that in mind. Sugarbakers is making my cake and it'll be delicious! Cakes for everybody!

@LeciaB, you're right! My FI gets 1 table. He already learned his lesson about oversharing. When we were at his mothers wedding, he was taking photos with his camera, which also has some of our photos in its memory. His aunts began asking him questions, wonder if and when we would marry, so he showed them photos of our venue and such. You know his aunts then asked, "Well, where's my invite?!" They were serious! He tried coming to me for help and I was like, naw boo, you shouldn't kept it quiet.

@Soon to Be Mrs Jay, Thank you for your support. I am busy, but I try to keep it balanced. When we were on furlough, I was really jittery, in need for something to do. It's been four weeks since I placed my order with Christopher Schafer. I have about another 2 - 4 weeks left. In the meantime, I've been working out. I want to fill my suit well.

@cidefi, Howdy, and thank you for reading my venting/explanation.

LeciaB · October 2013

@minsu5.. dang you left that man out there..lol its cool my fiance' did that to me with his aunt like 2 weeks ago..

thedivav · October 2013

minsu5 good luck with law school

i am lol @ your cuz who wants to hit on the single straight chicks lol

sorry to hear about your family i can sell you some of mine starting with my aunt who thought i would not invite her to my wedding cause she was acting like a bitch a few years ago

oddly enough she is a lawyer lol.... i will give ya 20 bucks to take her off my hands lol

thedivav · October 2013

Soon to Be Mrs Jay said:

@minsu5 Welcome back!! You are a very busy person. The fact that people are missing you at school shows you have placed a special mark on people lives. That is such a great trait to have. Your tux is going to be SHARP. Sharp as a knife. I saw some of Christopher Schafers work at a bridal showcase at The MD Zoo last weekend. I was impressed. Glad you are able to forgive your sister and allow her to be a part of your day. I pray that your day is a blessing to you and E, and also to all your guest.
Now do not stay away so long. Come pass often and say hello to us over here on TK.

man i wanted to go to the thing at the zoo but could not get out of bed..... *pouts*

minsu5 · November 2013

@thedivav, I love Christopher Schafer Clothiers. They have been very welcoming and instructive. I have about about 2 weeks before I see my tux and I can't wait. Meanwhile, E is still shopping around Men's Wearhouse and Jos. A. Bank. I keep telling him that he should go to a tailor and see if he can cut a deal somewhere, but noooooooo, he won't do it. He says it's too expensive. Well, I warned him.

Also, I'm only a student attorney ("practicing pursuant to Rule 16 of the Rules Governing Admission to the Bar of Maryland"). Thankfully, my clinic brought me back for another semester. so I'll have about a year's worth of experience before I graduate. Yae!! Now, for your aunt, I dunno. Law school have a tendency to suck the soul out of you.

@LeciaB, yep, you know it! We have a rule. If we invite more people above the 80 person cap, then we individually have to pay for that person. If he's trying to be cheap on his tuxedo, he ain't going to pay to invite another guest.

thedivav · November 2013

minsu5 said:

@thedivav, I love Christopher Schafer Clothiers. They have been very welcoming and instructive. I have about about 2 weeks before I see my tux and I can't wait. Meanwhile, E is still shopping around Men's Wearhouse and Jos. A. Bank. I keep telling him that he should go to a tailor and see if he can cut a deal somewhere, but noooooooo, he won't do it. He says it's too expensive. Well, I warned him.

Also, I'm only a student attorney ("practicing pursuant to Rule 16 of the Rules Governing Admission to the Bar of Maryland"). Thankfully, my clinic brought me back for another semester. so I'll have about a year's worth of experience before I graduate. Yae!! Now, for your aunt, I dunno. Law school have a tendency to suck the soul out of you.

@LeciaB, yep, you know it! We have a rule. If we invite more people above the 80 person cap, then we have to pay for that person. If he's trying to be cheap on his tuxedo, he ain't going to pay to invite another guest.

ok i cant wait to see this tux you will wear

aaahhh now i see what my aunts problem is lol

thats great that you clinic brought you back

good luck i know law school is no joke

LAWD LAWD LAWD...HES BACK!!

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