Getting him to 'pop the question'...

Re: Getting him to 'pop the question'...

• [Deleted User] member

  

  October 2013

  I know!  make him 300 sandwiches!  YES!
  

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• phira member

  

  October 2013

  @CocoBellaF OBVIOUSLY!! Like she and her boyfriend said, it's just THAT SIMPLE. 300 sandwiches = 1 engagement ring. The math is so easy, even a woman can do it.

  

  now with ~* INCREASED SASSINESS *~
  
  

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• bethsmiles member

  

  October 2013

  
  

  phira said:

  @CocoBellaF OBVIOUSLY!! Like she and her boyfriend said, it's just THAT SIMPLE. 300 sandwiches = 1 engagement ring. The math is so easy, even a woman can do it.

  I love this post and I love you!
  

  
  

  
  

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• Shiroyasha member

  

  October 2013

  

  
  

  This is what I have to say after reading this.  No one is entitled to an engagement. Ever.  

  

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• phira member

  

  October 2013

  bethsmiles said:

  
  

  phira said:

  @CocoBellaF OBVIOUSLY!! Like she and her boyfriend said, it's just THAT SIMPLE. 300 sandwiches = 1 engagement ring. The math is so easy, even a woman can do it.

  I love this post and I love you!
  

  
  

  

  now with ~* INCREASED SASSINESS *~
  
  

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• raysteph814 member

  

  November 2013

  to be honest my BF and I have been together for a year in a half and from the minute we started dating we instantly knew we were going to get married one day.. We recently moved to VA from NY for work and we work in the same office but not near each other.. we are inseperable though. I always look at engagement rings just because that is something i LOVE to do.. and he knows what I want and sometimes I get scared we are going to not get married anytime soon.. I actually am not looking for a wedding in the near future but for the engagment.. i feel like we are just ready and to be honest I even suggested the court house because our bank accounts are joined we live together and we are attached at the hip so whats a ring? I just have a feeling he is working something up and there will be a surprise which would be lovely but i am not sure when it will be.. i understand how you feel because its like you are married already and you want that excitement in your life the next step!! I feel you girlfriend! I hope he pops the question soon! if not just rememeber hes your best friend and it will happen when its supposed to happy! xo

   

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• CASK85 member

  

  November 2013

  raysteph814 said:

  to be honest my BF and I have been together for a year in a half and from the minute we started dating we instantly knew we were going to get married one day.. We recently moved to VA from NY for work and we work in the same office but not near each other.. we are inseperable though. I always look at engagement rings just because that is something i LOVE to do.. and he knows what I want and sometimes I get scared we are going to not get married anytime soon.. I actually am not looking for a wedding in the near future but for the engagment.. i feel like we are just ready and to be honest I even suggested the court house because our bank accounts are joined we live together and we are attached at the hip so whats a ring? I just have a feeling he is working something up and there will be a surprise which would be lovely but i am not sure when it will be.. i understand how you feel because its like you are married already and you want that excitement in your life the next step!! I feel you girlfriend! I hope he pops the question soon! if not just rememeber hes your best friend and it will happen when its supposed to happy! xo

   

  Because joined bank accounts and living together is the same thing as being married.

  
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• phira member

  

  November 2013

  CASK85 said:

  raysteph814 said:

  to be honest my BF and I have been together for a year in a half and from the minute we started dating we instantly knew we were going to get married one day.. We recently moved to VA from NY for work and we work in the same office but not near each other.. we are inseperable though. I always look at engagement rings just because that is something i LOVE to do.. and he knows what I want and sometimes I get scared we are going to not get married anytime soon.. I actually am not looking for a wedding in the near future but for the engagment.. i feel like we are just ready and to be honest I even suggested the court house because our bank accounts are joined we live together and we are attached at the hip so whats a ring? I just have a feeling he is working something up and there will be a surprise which would be lovely but i am not sure when it will be.. i understand how you feel because its like you are married already and you want that excitement in your life the next step!! I feel you girlfriend! I hope he pops the question soon! if not just rememeber hes your best friend and it will happen when its supposed to happy! xo

   

  Because joined bank accounts and living together is the same thing as being married.

  Wow, I've been married for a year and didn't realize it!

  

  now with ~* INCREASED SASSINESS *~
  
  

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• smalfrie19 member

  

  November 2013

  phira said:

  CASK85 said:

  raysteph814 said:

  to be honest my BF and I have been together for a year in a half and from the minute we started dating we instantly knew we were going to get married one day.. We recently moved to VA from NY for work and we work in the same office but not near each other.. we are inseperable though. I always look at engagement rings just because that is something i LOVE to do.. and he knows what I want and sometimes I get scared we are going to not get married anytime soon.. I actually am not looking for a wedding in the near future but for the engagment.. i feel like we are just ready and to be honest I even suggested the court house because our bank accounts are joined we live together and we are attached at the hip so whats a ring? I just have a feeling he is working something up and there will be a surprise which would be lovely but i am not sure when it will be.. i understand how you feel because its like you are married already and you want that excitement in your life the next step!! I feel you girlfriend! I hope he pops the question soon! if not just rememeber hes your best friend and it will happen when its supposed to happy! xo

   

  Because joined bank accounts and living together is the same thing as being married.

  Wow, I've been married for a year and didn't realize it!

  
  Does this mean I am not close to getting married, because we have separate bank accounts?!?!?

  

  
  

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• suzie211 member

  

  November 2013

  H and I only share a savings, and that's only been since last Saturday. Better go change my Facebook relationship status.

  
  

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• CASK85 member

  

  November 2013

  H and I don't share accounts at all. . . . he still writes me paper rent checks. HA!

  
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• suzie211 member

  

  November 2013

  CASK85 said:

  H and I don't share accounts at all. . . . he still writes me paper rent checks. HA!

  We Quick Pay each other!  

  
  

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• minskat30 member

  

  November 2013

  Shit!  H and I don't have joint bank accounts.  I guess this means we aren't married?!?

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• CASK85 member

  

  November 2013

  suzie211 said:

  CASK85 said:

  H and I don't share accounts at all. . . . he still writes me paper rent checks. HA!

  We Quick Pay each other!  

  
  

  
  

  Quick pay is great! He doesn't have Chase. He has some local bank from back home in CO. Silly DH. 

  
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• JCbride2015 member

  

  November 2013

  raysteph814 said:

  to be honest my BF and I have been together for a year in a half and from the minute we started dating we instantly knew we were going to get married one day.. We recently moved to VA from NY for work and we work in the same office but not near each other.. we are inseperable though. I always look at engagement rings just because that is something i LOVE to do.. and he knows what I want and sometimes I get scared we are going to not get married anytime soon.. I actually am not looking for a wedding in the near future but for the engagment.. i feel like we are just ready and to be honest I even suggested the court house because our bank accounts are joined we live together and we are attached at the hip so whats a ring? I just have a feeling he is working something up and there will be a surprise which would be lovely but i am not sure when it will be.. i understand how you feel because its like you are married already and you want that excitement in your life the next step!! I feel you girlfriend! I hope he pops the question soon! if not just rememeber hes your best friend and it will happen when its supposed to happy! xo

   

  @raysteph814 Can you explain this?  How can you be looking for an engagement without being ready for a wedding in the near future?  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  "I'm not a rude bitch.  I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."

  
  

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• raysteph814 member

  

  November 2013

  y'all didnt need to be so nasty... I was just saying that we have joined bank accounts and we are living together and we talk about getting married all the time I WASNT SAYING BECAUSE WE HAVE BAK ACCOUNTS WE ARE PRETTY MUCH MARRIED and if it came off that way sorry didnt mean it too..

  and for looking into getting engaged but not married yet.. everyone has their own time table.. the engagement can happen anytime he wants.. we know that we want to have a house and create an actual home rather than our apartment before we get married.. its a personal goal WE want to do for ourselves. and we can be engaged and not married right after the enagement.. everyone is different

   

  i am very dissapointed in the way that grown woman act on this thing.. you all need to do some growing up. Honestly look at what you are writing? its like you are attacking something that was said and dwell on it.. we have joined bank accounts.. we live together and our relationship is strong.. all i was saying is that transistion into marriage in the future wouldnt be much different than how we live now.. honestly ya'll need to get over yourselves.

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• buddysmom80 member

  

  November 2013 edited November 2013

  y'all didnt need to be so nasty... I was just saying that we have joined bank accounts and we are living together and we talk about getting married all the time I WASNT SAYING BECAUSE WE HAVE BAK ACCOUNTS WE ARE PRETTY MUCH MARRIED and if it came off that way sorry didnt mean it too..

  and for looking into getting engaged but not married yet.. everyone has their own time table.. the engagement can happen anytime he wants.. we know that we want to have a house and create an actual home rather than our apartment before we get married.. its a personal goal WE want to do for ourselves. and we can be engaged and not married right after the enagement.. everyone is different

   

  i am very dissapointed in the way that grown woman act on this thing.. you all need to do some growing up. Honestly look at what you are writing? its like you are attacking something that was said and dwell on it.. we have joined bank accounts.. we live together and our relationship is strong.. all i was saying is that transistion into marriage in the future wouldnt be much different than how we live now.. honestly ya'll need to get over yourselves.

  

   

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• smalfrie19 member

  

  November 2013

  raysteph814 said:

  y'all didnt need to be so nasty... I was just saying that we have joined bank accounts and we are living together and we talk about getting married all the time I WASNT SAYING BECAUSE WE HAVE BAK ACCOUNTS WE ARE PRETTY MUCH MARRIED and if it came off that way sorry didnt mean it too..

  and for looking into getting engaged but not married yet.. everyone has their own time table.. the engagement can happen anytime he wants.. we know that we want to have a house and create an actual home rather than our apartment before we get married.. its a personal goal WE want to do for ourselves. and we can be engaged and not married right after the enagement.. everyone is different

   

  i am very dissapointed in the way that grown woman act on this thing.. you all need to do some growing up. Honestly look at what you are writing? its like you are attacking something that was said and dwell on it.. we have joined bank accounts.. we live together and our relationship is strong.. all i was saying is that transistion into marriage in the future wouldnt be much different than how we live now.. honestly ya'll need to get over yourselves.

  
  It is a very different lifestyle..its permanent. You can close bank accounts and move out before marriage if things go south. Its about making things work throught the shitty times when you are so frustrated you want to throw something at his head and just walk away. Marriage isn't something you enter into because you have joined bank accounts and live together...

  

  
  

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• CASK85 member

  

  November 2013

  raysteph814 said:

  y'all didnt need to be so nasty... I was just saying that we have joined bank accounts and we are living together and we talk about getting married all the time I WASNT SAYING BECAUSE WE HAVE BAK ACCOUNTS WE ARE PRETTY MUCH MARRIED and if it came off that way sorry didnt mean it too..

  and for looking into getting engaged but not married yet.. everyone has their own time table.. the engagement can happen anytime he wants.. we know that we want to have a house and create an actual home rather than our apartment before we get married.. its a personal goal WE want to do for ourselves. and we can be engaged and not married right after the enagement.. everyone is different

   

  i am very dissapointed in the way that grown woman act on this thing.. you all need to do some growing up. Honestly look at what you are writing? its like you are attacking something that was said and dwell on it.. we have joined bank accounts.. we live together and our relationship is strong.. all i was saying is that transistion into marriage in the future wouldnt be much different than how we live now.. honestly ya'll need to get over yourselves.

  i feel like we are just ready and to be honest I even suggested the court house because our bank accounts are joined we live together and we are attached at the hip so whats a ring?

  You literally said the above "sentence." Which to me suggests that you don't consider marriage to be a very big step once you live together and share finances. After all "what's a ring?"

  I think that is a ridiculously incorrect sentiment. I wasn't being mean by pointing this out. You need to calm yourself down.

  
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• Blackbird230 member

  

  November 2013

  raysteph814 said:

  y'all didnt need to be so nasty... I was just saying that we have joined bank accounts and we are living together and we talk about getting married all the time I WASNT SAYING BECAUSE WE HAVE BAK ACCOUNTS WE ARE PRETTY MUCH MARRIED and if it came off that way sorry didnt mean it too..

  and for looking into getting engaged but not married yet.. everyone has their own time table.. the engagement can happen anytime he wants.. we know that we want to have a house and create an actual home rather than our apartment before we get married.. its a personal goal WE want to do for ourselves. and we can be engaged and not married right after the enagement.. everyone is different

   

  i am very dissapointed in the way that grown woman act on this thing.. you all need to do some growing up. Honestly look at what you are writing? its like you are attacking something that was said and dwell on it.. we have joined bank accounts.. we live together and our relationship is strong.. all i was saying is that transistion into marriage in the future wouldnt be much different than how we live now.. honestly ya'll need to get over yourselves.

  
  

  
  

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• raysteph814 member

  

  November 2013

  Who's to say we havent been through some of our darkest days together? just because we arent married doesnt mean I didnt lose my 16 year old cousin to cancer and spent months crying and not wanting to come out of the house because she was my best friend... hes been there through my darkest of days, surgeries and etc... we dont get along all the time but we work through things.. we know that marriage is forever and we have a very big understanding of that.. we joined bank accounts because we currently moved 5 hours from home and actually have our own bills to pay and rent so we created a system.. no disrespect to those whose accounts arent joined I still have another account of mine that is just mine. the way you all mocked my statement was hurtful that is all I was saying.. people come here to voice their opinion on problems people have.. everyone is different no 2 people are the same and for grown woman to laugh and mock something said so innocently is crazy. I am sorry if it crossed anyones boundaries there was no intensions to do that it was just simply a story to bounce off the original one.. and to come back days later and see these responses is beyond hurtful.. I come to this site during my day at work to read and take a break from actual work and to come back to all this is crazy.. I dont understand why people just cant be nice.. just because we are all strangers doesnt mean we cant treat others with respect.. how would you like it if something you said was responded to in ways that made you feel really upset and angry about?

  thats all

  and for those who were not trying to be nasty sorry I took it that way just defending myself over here.

   

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• raysteph814 member

  

  November 2013

  *with disrespect.

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• bethsmiles member

  

  November 2013

  @raysteph814 - Noone was trying to be nasty. All you needed to do.was clarify not get super defensive and rather nasty yourself. This is a community full of wonderful, supportive, intelligent, caring women. And when people misconstrue something we say we don't get on a high horse and throw a fit about it. We clarify what we meant and sometimes just agree to disagree. In short, we do the opposite of you've done here.

  
  

  
  

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• GoldenPenguin mod

  

  November 2013

  

  
  

  Do you feel sorry for our husbands too? 

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• JCbride2015 member

  

  November 2013

  RaySteph I'm the one who asked about how you can want an engagement without looking for a wedding soon.  It was coming across to me that you felt like you deserve to be engaged because you share a household with your BF.  It's great that you share financial responsibility and have helped each other through dark times.  That's what any successful relationship would do.  Engagement doesn't change that.  Engagement is because you and BF have a concrete plan to get married, not just because it feels like the next step in your relationship.

  
  

  Here's why I get touchy about this kind of thing.  I've been with Fi since high school, over ten years now.  For about five years, we have shared our household in pretty much the way you are describing.  Various life circumstances prevented us from being able to get married right away (finances, a year of being long-distance, etc.)  BUT!  But!  We were not engaged!  Why not?  Because we knew we wouldn't be able to hold a wedding within the next couple of years.  Fi proposed once we were back settled living together again, no more long-distance, and ready to start planning our wedding.  

  
  

  Living together and managing your finances doesn't entitle anybody to an engagement.  I can speak from experience that being engaged actually does feel different for me.  I expect marriage to be different, too.  These stages of relationships have deep meaning and shouldn't be entered into just because it seems like the next thing to do.  For me, hearing that living together means you're "basically" married anyway really cheapens all the waiting, preparation, and relationship-building that went into mine and Fi's engagement and future marriage.

  
  

  
  

  
  

  "I'm not a rude bitch.  I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."

  
  

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• smalfrie19 member

  

  November 2013

  raysteph814 said:

  Who's to say we havent been through some of our darkest days together? just because we arent married doesnt mean I didnt lose my 16 year old cousin to cancer and spent months crying and not wanting to come out of the house because she was my best friend... hes been there through my darkest of days, surgeries and etc... we dont get along all the time but we work through things.. we know that marriage is forever and we have a very big understanding of that.. we joined bank accounts because we currently moved 5 hours from home and actually have our own bills to pay and rent so we created a system.. no disrespect to those whose accounts arent joined I still have another account of mine that is just mine. the way you all mocked my statement was hurtful that is all I was saying.. people come here to voice their opinion on problems people have.. everyone is different no 2 people are the same and for grown woman to laugh and mock something said so innocently is crazy. I am sorry if it crossed anyones boundaries there was no intensions to do that it was just simply a story to bounce off the original one.. and to come back days later and see these responses is beyond hurtful.. I come to this site during my day at work to read and take a break from actual work and to come back to all this is crazy.. I dont understand why people just cant be nice.. just because we are all strangers doesnt mean we cant treat others with respect.. how would you like it if something you said was responded to in ways that made you feel really upset and angry about?

  thats all

  and for those who were not trying to be nasty sorry I took it that way just defending myself over here.

   

  Again, him being there for you when you are having a difficult life event is way different then you still being with him when you are BOTH having difficulties with each other.
  

  

  
  

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