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So I guess our little wedding might be going up in size

Kristen625Kristen625 member
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in May 2014 Weddings
I sent out an email to the parents (his and mine) for guest lists since I haven't gotten anything from anyone.  In my email I reminded everyone that we want to keep it small.  Well my mom called me and said to just invite everyone and don't worry about it.  Thankfully, and every so graciously of her she and my step dad are paying for our venue which includes the food and drinks and she is okay paying for more people.  Now my entire family is in CA and we are getting married in IL, so I'm hoping that most people won't want to make trek all the way out here.  We aren't that close to Chicago, so its not like there is a whole lot out here in the suburbs.  I'm trying not to stress about having a giant wedding, and to be honest, I don't even know what it is about it that stresses me out.  I guess once I send out invites we shall see how it is, and what happens.  It could be that I'm stressing for nothing and the amount of people I'm thinking will actually show will be the ones to show and not a giant caravan of people.  Yesterday I got a little wigged out, and thank goodness for my FI.  He is amazing.  We went out and had a fun evening together so I could distress.  Not sure what I am really typing for, but it feels good to get it out. :)
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Re: So I guess our little wedding might be going up in size

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    pumpkinsandturkeyspumpkinsandturkeys member
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    We're having a super small wedding (maybe 35ish people?) and every time we talk about *maybe* adding another person to the list, I totally tense up haha. I feel as though it completely messes with the vision that I have, which is funny because I never thought of myself as one of those girls with a really defined vision of her wedding. If someone else was paying for it, I'm sure that I'd have an easier time saying, "Sure -- add on 50 more people!" haha, but in the back of my head, I'd always wonder if it was going to be the wedding I wanted it to be, or someone else's idea of what my wedding should be. At the end of the day, it's just one party and one day and if there are a few more people there, it really shouldn't matter, especially if it's not busting your budget. Besides, it's a little flattering that they all want to be there to celebrate your love :)


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    Kristen625Kristen625 member
    5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper

    And maybe that is the issue... the vision thing. But like you I never saw myself as one of those brides that has been envisioning the day since birth, so I don't know.  And my FI said the same thing about seeing it as flattery that everyone wants to celebrate with us.  I don't know, I guess I just like the idea of a smaller wedding. Maybe its weird jittery nerves lol.  Anyways, I know it will be fine, and everything will be great and the small stuff won't matter.  Because lets be honest, my main goal that day is to be legally married to the love of my life.  I want to be his wife, and have him as my husband.  Everything else that day is just icing on the cake and a celebration :)

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    FutureMrsN3312FutureMrsN3312 member
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    We would have loved to have a small wedding but we have huge families.  Obviously you have to do what you can afford. 

    I was talking about this with my MOH.  She wanted a wedding of 75 people so that's what she had.  We just recently went to her son's christening and as she looked around the room she said I love that these people all came for my son.  I regret not inviting some of them to my wedding just because I was so worried about it being a small wedding.

    Made sense to me.  Maybe something to help ease your mind :)
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    rfinch316rfinch316 member
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    I totally envisioned a much smaller wedding than the one we are having! My initially plan was about 150 people. That even seemed like a high number to me, but after doing our list together, we ended up with about 175-180. No big deal. I can deal with 180. Well... after FMIL gave me her list... we were up to 274! Needless to say, many tears were shed once we got home (okay, okay a major meltdown ensued!), and I dealt with the loss of my "vision" and am now just hoping most of those people we don't know don't show up! Those invites can "accidentally" get "lost in the mail", right? lol.
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    akopitzkeakopitzke member
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    @rfinch316 oh wow thats a huge increase! I too am hoping some people just don't show up! Our venue provides tables and chairs for up to 200 and we're inviting about 250 :/ I wanted something smaller, like around 150. but hey, maybe we'll only end up with 150? a friend told me they invited around 300 people and only 160 came! so there is hope!!
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    klburke88klburke88 member
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    I am going to be so relieved when we start getting those first RSVP's back and I see the "declines" marked down! I know that sounds terrible, but at this point I don't really care! I'm hoping to be able to remove at least one whole table of 8 and open up space for a bigger dance floor, LOL. The day our headcount is 100% finalized will be one of the happiest days of my life!
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    Kristen625Kristen625 member
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    @klburke88 omg I laughed so hard at your post.  I too feel the same way.  I feel terrible sending out invites with the hope that they don't come.  I'm REALLY hoping the "no kid" thing will deter people from coming.  Don't get me wrong, I can't wait to celebrate with my friends and family, but the guest list is a little out of control lol. :)
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    pumpkinsandturkeyspumpkinsandturkeys member
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    I'm so the opposite -- I'm hoping everyone RSVPs 'yes'! We have such a small wedding planned that if more than one or two people decline, we run the risk of having huge gaps of empty seats at our tables haha. But it's 98% family, so we're expecting near-perfect attendance :)


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