Vendor Tipping

Siobhan112 · January 2014

Not sure if this is the correct Board or not but perhaps someone could help me.......How and when or if do you tip vendors??? Do we bring a check to the actual reception or can we mail a check afterwards for tipping the DJ, photographer, and caterer? Are we supposed to tip them all? If so, how much is common?

I'm assuming I don't have to also tip the bartender as they are provided by my caterer. Does one tip the wedding director aswell?

Thanks for any advice you might have!

lyndausvi · January 2014

We made up envelopes to give out the day off. Our caterer (including the bartender) didn't include gratuity in the contract. Yours might so I would check.

We tipped our wedding coordinator.

We had to pay for all services up front or by the end of the event. Also check your contracts, it's rare they allowed payment after the event.

[Deleted User] · January 2014

This is what we did

Hairstylist - tipped after service (not sure if it was cash or credit card as my MOH surprised me & paid for my hair while I was getting done)
Limo driver - cash at end of run
DJ - cash towards end of night
Photographer - cash towards end of night, but I've heard where some people wait until they see work of photgrapher (you should tip even if they are the owner of the business they still worked hard to capture your special day)
Reception staff - it was in my contract that gratuity was included in my contract fee, but not all venues include it in the price
Florist - didn't tip, I paid for a product & delivery fee,
Cake - was provided by venue

How much you tip depends on how happy you are with service. On limos I've seen 10-20% (my husband. I think you can use that as a standard for tipping for most anything.

Maggie0829 · January 2014

You can tip everyone, some or no one at all. If you do tip I would do it at the end of the night. That way if you were unhappy with their work that tip you were going to give them could decrease or disappear all together.

As for bartenders, read your catering contract. Some already include gratuity in with your payment while others may not.

Finally, typically tips that are given are given in the form of cash just to make things easier.

smalfrie19 · January 2014

small thread jack...tipping isn't expected if the person is the owner of the company correct?

Inkdancer · January 2014

smalfrie19 said:

small thread jack...tipping isn't expected if the person is the owner of the company correct?

Not expected, but nice. My photographers are just 2 co-owners and they charge 1/2 of what everyone else does locally, so I will probably tip them.

monkeysip · January 2014

Just a note, but you might forget/be too busy the day of. That happened to me with a couple vendors. Our organist bolted from the Church before we even got a chance to get the envelope! But just make sure, assuming you were happy with their service, to follow up later through the mail (or in person)!

Maggie0829 · January 2014

My question is for those that didn't tip the florist or baker but did tip the photographer and DJ. Why the difference in tipping? You are paying them all for their services so why would one get tipped and not the other?

Mainly just wondering what everyone's train of thought on this was.

futuremrsog15 · January 2014

I have a question to add. I am just beginning the planning of our wedding. Visited two receptions sites. One said a 20% "service charge" is added to our bill... but it is not gratuity. Does that sound right?
I also need to know how much to tip vendors. I looked online last weekend and read one article saying to tip servers based on an hourly wage NOT the total cost of the meal. Does this make sense to anyone? It kind of did at the time I read it and now I can't find it again...

Help! I am a new bride planning

Inkdancer · January 2014

futuremrsog15 said:

I have a question to add. I am just beginning the planning of our wedding. Visited two receptions sites. One said a 20% "service charge" is added to our bill... but it is not gratuity. Does that sound right?
I also need to know how much to tip vendors. I looked online last weekend and read one article saying to tip servers based on an hourly wage NOT the total cost of the meal. Does this make sense to anyone? It kind of did at the time I read it and now I can't find it again...

Help! I am a new bride planning

Ask them what the service charge is for. For my caterer, the service charge pays the salaries of the waitstaff and cooks. Any tip would be additional.

Tipping vendors varies. I am likely to tip only 5% on a $5,000 photography package, but give a much larger percentage tip to a musician who plays for the ceremony and only charges me $200. Give enough that it really does come across as thanks to them, not just "I have to tip so here's $5."

futuremrsog15 · January 2014

Inkdancer said:

futuremrsog15 said:

I have a question to add. I am just beginning the planning of our wedding. Visited two receptions sites. One said a 20% "service charge" is added to our bill... but it is not gratuity. Does that sound right?
I also need to know how much to tip vendors. I looked online last weekend and read one article saying to tip servers based on an hourly wage NOT the total cost of the meal. Does this make sense to anyone? It kind of did at the time I read it and now I can't find it again...

Help! I am a new bride planning

Ask them what the service charge is for. For my caterer, the service charge pays the salaries of the waitstaff and cooks. Any tip would be additional.

Tipping vendors varies. I am likely to tip only 5% on a $5,000 photography package, but give a much larger percentage tip to a musician who plays for the ceremony and only charges me $200. Give enough that it really does come across as thanks to them, not just "I have to tip so here's $5."

Thanks! Great advice

lyndausvi · January 2014

futuremrsog15 said:

I have a question to add. I am just beginning the planning of our wedding. Visited two receptions sites. One said a 20% "service charge" is added to our bill... but it is not gratuity. Does that sound right?
I also need to know how much to tip vendors. I looked online last weekend and read one article saying to tip servers based on an hourly wage NOT the total cost of the meal. Does this make sense to anyone? It kind of did at the time I read it and now I can't find it again...

Help! I am a new bride planning

It depends on the venue. We didn't have a service charge. However we had to pay each staff members $30 per hour, per person for min of 8 hours. Gratuity was additional.

Maggie0829 · January 2014

I have a question to add. I am just beginning the planning of our wedding. Visited two receptions sites. One said a 20% "service charge" is added to our bill... but it is not gratuity. Does that sound right?
I also need to know how much to tip vendors. I looked online last weekend and read one article saying to tip servers based on an hourly wage NOT the total cost of the meal. Does this make sense to anyone? It kind of did at the time I read it and now I can't find it again...

Help! I am a new bride planning

Yup, I have heard that. A "service charge" is basically a "cover your ass" charge just in case something comes up and you have workers working longer then one may expect. But depending on the venue this "service charge" may or may not include gratuity so just double check with whoever you go with.

As for how much you tip 10-15% is a good rule of thumb to go by. I have never heard of the hourly wage scenario though. So basically if the servers get paid say $10/hour and they work 6 hours then you tip them based on the $60 they made that night and not the price of your meal?

Edit because I can't spell today.

futuremrsog15 · January 2014

Maggie0829 said:

I have a question to add. I am just beginning the planning of our wedding. Visited two receptions sites. One said a 20% "service charge" is added to our bill... but it is not gratuity. Does that sound right?
I also need to know how much to tip vendors. I looked online last weekend and read one article saying to tip servers based on an hourly wage NOT the total cost of the meal. Does this make sense to anyone? It kind of did at the time I read it and now I can't find it again...

Help! I am a new bride planning
Yup, I have heard that. A "service charge" is basically a "cover your ass" charge just in case something comes up and you have workers working longer then one may expect. But depending on the venue this "service charge" may or may not include gratuity so just double check with whoever you go with.

As for how much you tip 10-15% is a good rule of thumb to go by. I have never heard of the hourly wage scenario though. So basically if the servers get paid say $10/hour and they work 6 hours then you tip them based on the $60 they made that night and not the price of your meal?

Edit because I can't spell today.

Yes that is about how they described it. I will try and that article I don't mean to just talk about it without referring to it properly.
Thanks for the advice. I will be sure to clarify with everyone because that will affect the budget!

Cookie Pusher · January 2014

Our caterer stated that the staff for our wedding is being paid $XX per hour, and if we were pleased with the service, $20-25/person tip is pretty standard. Considering the waitstaff's hourly wage is more than mine, I thought that was pretty fair. Our service charge was to cover setup/breakdown of our wedding since our venue has very specific rules about what condition it must be left in (garbage and recycling have to be put in a specific place, sweeping the floors, etc). If we find the service to be really good, we'll probably tip a little bit more than that (we already factored it into our budget). Plus, the caterer is including some extras in our package and reducing costs for some of our rentals so we'll save a few hundred dollars. I have no issues paying it forward to the staff that's helping to make our wedding possible!

winelover123 · January 2014

Our venue told us how many servers there would be so we put a certain amount for each server in an envelope for them and my dad gave it to them at the end of the night. We went to our wedding prepared with cash to tip the DJ, bartender, venue coordinator and musicians (we didn't have a florist or baker) and at the end of the night, if we were happy with the service they provided they got the tip. They all did a fabulous job so my dad gave them their envelopes before he left. We didn't tip our photographer that night - we wanted to see the pictures and then, if we were happy with them (which we weren't) we would send her a check.

vmj23 · January 2014

sorry to ask questions off your post, but i have similar questions!

how do you tip the florist - do you leave money at the venue for when the florist delivers? or tip when they deliver the bouquets?

Also, for the photographer - our's is the owner of the company, it's just her - should she be tipped?

Maggie0829 · January 2014

I've been wondering about this as well. We are renting an entire restaurant for our reception. This will include food, bartender, servers, linens, tables, chairs, set up, etc for a flat rate. The rate has been described as "includes tax, but not gratuity". That's fine, we are prepared to tip. However, what do you tip on something like that? 20% of $5,000 is $1,000... that just seems like a lot. What would you guys do?

I would talk to your venue and see what the typical tip is for an event like yours. I am sure yours isn't the first large event they have had so they probably have some recommendations.

Siobhan112 · January 2014

Thank you all so much for the advice! I'm also glad to know I'm not the only one who has been struggling with this!

Chipmunk415 · January 2014

I was told the service charge covered the waitstaff- no additional fee for them. I'm tipping the officiant, the DJ, and the photographer, as all have given me really good deals/breaks for a daytime event. Even if I don't hire the event manager as DOC (she does offer that service), I've gotten the info from the officiant as to manager's favorite restaurant (they are good friends). Manager rarely gets to go out to favorite place, so in addition to my thank you card, I'm giving her a gift certificate to said restaurant.

themuffinman16 · January 2014

My venue has an 18% service charge. The event coordinator at the venue says that their staff makes more than minimum wage and this percentage goes towards their wages. Should I tip on top of that? If so, what percentage should I tip on top of that? I used to be a server, so I would be comfortable with a 20% tip to the staff. But now that they make more money, it is just confusing as to what is expected of me. I know "nothing is expected of me," but I just want to be fair. It is hard asking any of my vendors what is the average tip they receive, no one will answer me, because they think it is taboo. I would rather have them be slightly rude and tell me, so I know what they usually receive. And then, it is my call to tip them more or less than their average, depending on their service.

Also, my photographer works for herself, we are paying her $3,500, and plan on buying prints and albums from her. Should I tip her on top of that? She is really pricey, but she does amazing work.Wondering if the prints and the albums are her way of getting an extra profit, or if a tip would still be customary.

We may be hiring a family friend for our DJ. He works for himself, so he receives all of the profits and does not have to share wages with anyone. Is it customary to tip him as well? Lastly, and this has been quite troubling for me, my Fi's Aunt is a professional baker. She is making our wedding cake. She makes everyone's wedding cakes, in the family. I was told it is our wedding gift. Should I give her a tip or a gift certificate to a store? I have tried to ask my FIs family and no one has answered me. I would hate to enter into my FIs family making a huge etiquette faux pas. If it is a gift, then that would be like me sending gift cards in my thank you notes to all of my guests, which I would find odd. I feel like she is saving us a lot of money, so I would like her to know it is appreciated.

Maggie0829 · January 2014

My venue has an 18% service charge. The event coordinator at the venue says that their staff makes more than minimum wage and this percentage goes towards their wages. Should I tip on top of that? If so, what percentage should I tip on top of that? I used to be a server, so I would be comfortable with a 20% tip to the staff. But now that they make more money, it is just confusing as to what is expected of me. I know "nothing is expected of me," but I just want to be fair. It is hard asking any of my vendors what is the average tip they receive, no one will answer me, because they think it is taboo. I would rather have them be slightly rude and tell me, so I know what they usually receive. And then, it is my call to tip them more or less than their average, depending on their service.
Also, my photographer works for herself, we are paying her $3,500, and plan on buying prints and albums from her. Should I tip her on top of that? She is really pricey, but she does amazing work.Wondering if the prints and the albums are her way of getting an extra profit, or if a tip would still be customary.
We may be hiring a family friend for our DJ. He works for himself, so he receives all of the profits and does not have to share wages with anyone. Is it customary to tip him as well? Lastly, and this has been quite troubling for me, my Fi's Aunt is a professional baker. She is making our wedding cake. She makes everyone's wedding cakes, in the family. I was told it is our wedding gift. Should I give her a tip or a gift certificate to a store? I have tried to ask my FIs family and no one has answered me. I would hate to enter into my FIs family making a huge etiquette faux pas. If it is a gift, then that would be like me sending gift cards in my thank you notes to all of my guests, which I would find odd. I feel like she is saving us a lot of money, so I would like her to know it is appreciated.

I think you should tip with what you feel comfortable tipping. Don't worry about percentages or what they may normally get tipped. Tip what you want and what you can. Any tip over top of what they already get paid is just icing on the cake since you are already paying for their services.

As for the Aunt I would get her a little something, either a gift certificate or maybe a nice bottle of wine (if she is into that) and write her a heartfelt note thanking her for the wonderful gift.

themuffinman16 · January 2014

Thank you so much, Maggie. You are always so helpful. I just want to make sure I have configured tips into my budget, so I can spend less in certain areas to make sure everyone feels appreciated for their service.

lyndausvi · January 2014

GlitterWitch22 said:

I've been wondering about this as well. We are renting an entire restaurant for our reception. This will include food, bartender, servers, linens, tables, chairs, set up, etc for a flat rate. The rate has been described as "includes tax, but not gratuity". That's fine, we are prepared to tip. However, what do you tip on something like that? 20% of $5,000 is $1,000... that just seems like a lot. What would you guys do?

Do they breakdown the food and bar costs at all?

If not I would tip at least 15%. I easily made $250 per night bartending or waiting tables. Depending on the size of the staff $1000 isn't outrageous when you break it down.

Maggie0829 · January 2014

themuffinman16 said:

Thank you so much, Maggie. You are always so helpful. I just want to make sure I have configured tips into my budget, so I can spend less in certain areas to make sure everyone feels appreciated for their service.

If I were you I would just give each server $20. Say they make $10/hour and they work 6 hours that is $60 they made for the night. 20% of that is $12 so a nice $20 bill would be extra generous.

Then do the same with your other vendors. Don't think about percentage just think about a dollar amount you think is a nice gesture and won't blow a hole in your wallet.

firebabe6519 · January 2014

GlitterWitch22 said:
I've been wondering about this as well. We are renting an entire restaurant for our reception. This will include food, bartender, servers, linens, tables, chairs, set up, etc for a flat rate. The rate has been described as "includes tax, but not gratuity". That's fine, we are prepared to tip. However, what do you tip on something like that? 20% of $5,000 is $1,000... that just seems like a lot. What would you guys do?

Depending on your location, servers generally make between $2.15 to $4.20 an hour at the restaurant. Many restaurants now even force servers to pay in a percentage of their total sales (c. 2%). I would ask the restaurant about their policy concerning this. That way you have a better idea of what to tip.

MrsDeRuyter87 · January 2014

I tipped everyone the night of except for our photographer. I will send her a thank you card and a tip once I see the final product. I know they will be great but I felt I couldn't truely judge how much she deserved to be tipped based on just meeting her and interacting with her. I want to make sure my pictures are done right first.

STARMOON44 · January 2014

I don't see any reason to tip someone who owns their business for their personal services- hair stylist DJ or photographer. You're paying the photog to work hard to cover your special day. If you want to give them something else, go with a positive review and save the money for others.

mbross3 · January 2014

I would tip even if they own their own business- if they did a great job. Tipping is a way of showing your thanks for doing a wonderful job, and if they do they should be tipped. If someone is being paid a wage, that amount has been factored into the overall cost of the service. Server's wages have been factored into the catering company's charges-so the catering company is not losing money by paying their servers, why should they get tipped and not the independent DJ?

That being said, don't tip (or lower the tip) if they don't do the job well!

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