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Annoyed with people telling you about weddings they attend?

I may be being unfair, but is anyone else just slightly annoyed with people telling you about weddings they attend. My family and friends are not so bad, but my co-workers insist on telling me the details of every single wedding they attend. They offer their opinons on what they thought of the food, the dress, the music, etc. I have one co-worker who attended a wedding two weeks ago, but prior to that, she brought me the Save the Date and the invitation and then proceeded to critique them.  She didn't like that there were whimsical characters on them; she thought they should have been more fomral. I'm not sure what my response should be. Up to that point, I had just listened to her talk, and then finally I said, you know, you really need to stop bringing me things you don't like, because you don't  know whether the things I have selected are similar. 

All of my collegues are twenty years older than me, and while I love them, they tend to be patronizing, albiet unintetionally, when it comes to younger generations.  They often make value judgments about what the bridal party should wear, i.e., sleeves instead of strapless dresses  and larger bridesmaids should not wear form  fitting dresses.  I finally said to them that  my bridesmaids, while full figured, are comfortable in their bodies and with wearing dresses that are modern and flatter their figure and curves. 

I guess I'm so tired of hearing their unsolicited comments and views.  It didn't bother me much in the beginning, but as I get closer to my wedding, it bothers me more and more.  While I may not have chosen the same things the bride did in the weddings they attended, I'm not going to critize her choices.
And, by the same token, I don't want to hear about how much money she spent. They knowa lot of brides with weathly parents. I'm paying for wedding myself. Just needed to vent.

Re: Annoyed with people telling you about weddings they attend?

  • I may be being unfair, but is anyone else just slightly annoyed with people telling you about weddings they attend. My family and friends are not so bad, but my co-workers insist on telling me the details of every single wedding they attend. They offer their opinons on what they thought of the food, the dress, the music, etc. I have one co-worker who attended a wedding two weeks ago, but prior to that, she brought me the Save the Date and the invitation and then proceeded to critique them.  She didn't like that there were whimsical characters on them; she thought they should have been more fomral. I'm not sure what my response should be. Up to that point, I had just listened to her talk, and then finally I said, you know, you really need to stop bringing me things you don't like, because you don't  know whether the things I have selected are similar. 

    All of my collegues are twenty years older than me, and while I love them, they tend to be patronizing, albiet unintetionally, when it comes to younger generations.  They often make value judgments about what the bridal party should wear, i.e., sleeves instead of strapless dresses  and larger bridesmaids should not wear form  fitting dresses.  I finally said to them that  my bridesmaids, while full figured, are comfortable in their bodies and with wearing dresses that are modern and flatter their figure and curves. 

    I guess I'm so tired of hearing their unsolicited comments and views.  It didn't bother me much in the beginning, but as I get closer to my wedding, it bothers me more and more.  While I may not have chosen the same things the bride did in the weddings they attended, I'm not going to critize her choices.
    And, by the same token, I don't want to hear about how much money she spent. They knowa lot of brides with weathly parents. I'm paying for wedding myself. Just needed to vent.
  • Yeah, I can see how that would be annoying.  Just remind yourself that they have good intentions, despite their delivery!  some people are just so clueless.
  • Just change the subject when they bring it up.  They're just trying to help.
    The Bee Hive Est. June 30, 2007
    "So I sing a song of love, Julia"
    06.10.10

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  • A lot of people think the ONLY thing to talk about with someone getting married is weddings.  I know when I was engaged I got so sick of co-workers saying "so how's the wedding planning going?" but it was just their lame attempt at making conversation.  It was the one thing going on in my life that they knew about, so they asked about it.  I'm sure it's the same for your co-workers.  They're being clueless but they mean well.  It'll be over soon enough!
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  • Speaking as a bride who is less than a week out, I can honestly say, just change the subject for now, and eventually, it's going to go away.

    Pretty much when I was still making decisions, people would try to tell me "Oh do this or that". But once a decision was made, and could not be "un-made" (Like contracts were signed or details that were absolutely final by x date) people quickly backed off said topic. Just be polite, but firm that you're not changing something you love to make somebody that's not paying for it (And who, in my case at least, usually wasn't even invited to the wedding in the first place) happy.

    Ever since most things were "finished" I haven't been getting a lot of advice. Now people have just been asking me for the past month "So are you nervous?", lol.


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  • Yeah i agree, i would change the subject. I to work with older women whom have there own opinions. There is always someone who will not like somthing about the wedding. Enjoy your day. After all it's about you and memories for the both of you to remember.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_annoyed-people-telling-weddings-attend?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:7945fb1c-339c-4938-8d46-eb4e3b3ca337Post:784a4c6f-6b68-4cb9-b9a0-0dcbf2c554d9">Re: Annoyed with people telling you about weddings they attend?</a>:
    [QUOTE]A lot of people think the ONLY thing to talk about with someone getting married is weddings.  I know when I was engaged I got so sick of co-workers saying "so how's the wedding planning going?" but it was just their lame attempt at making conversation.  It was the one thing going on in my life that they knew about, so they asked about it.  I'm sure it's the same for your co-workers.  They're being clueless but they mean well.  It'll be over soon enough!
    Posted by danieliza1127[/QUOTE]

    And then everyone will start asking "So, when are you two going to have a baby?"  And they, no doubt, have tons of advice about that too.
  • I completely understand where your coming from! My aunt is the one telling me what I should and shouldn't do. It really drives me nuts, I was told that i need to invite my whole family (people my parents didn't even invite to theirs).

    I also feel like im being compared to my future sister in law. Her parents had a ton of money and she was an only child. From the pictures I gather that she had a big wedding. I am not- a small wedding party and that's it.

    At my daughters baby shower my FMIL decided while I was opening presents to ask my FSIL how many people she had at her shower because it seemed like a lot more.

    Just ignore the comments for now, your just stressed out about your wedding getting closer.

  • I actually liked it when people did this.  It gave me an opportunity to hear about what kinds of weddings my friends were going to, and what sort of things they remembered/liked/disliked about weddings. 
  • I hear you loud and clear! The worst part to me is that my fiance takes everything to heart. We'll be making a decision and he'll say, "Well so and so said that this was awful at a wedding they were at, so i don't think we should do it."  I can't do much about him, , but I just remind myself that you can't please everyone so work on pleasing you and your fiance.

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