April 2014 Weddings

Furious at future MIL!!

Hello everyone, I'm getting married on April 26th (I think). I posted this on the Wedding 911 board but wanted it to be seen again. My FI mom said she knew the manager at a local hotel and she would take care of the reception. This was around Thanksgiving. She said the manager could reserve a room for a small (20 people) wedding and reception. Cue to 2 weeks ago they come from being gone 3 months in Florida and future MIL starts in on what kind of food we should have. Mind you, she's been saying all along that "the reception is taken care of stop worrying. Well come to find out last night we are getting whatever room is left over. WTF?!? We went to the hotel last night because we were told to come view rooms between 6-9pm. We get there and all rooms are booked, we can't see them. Then future MIL says to my FI today (18 days before the wedding) that he and I have to foot the food bill after being told for months the reception is taken care of. I'm freaking out! No firm venue, no food, etc. I don't know what the heck to do?!? Trust she's got the location covered and find out the day of the wedding we have no venue or take the bull by the horns and find some cheap backup. I haven't budgeted anything for the reception as far as food or the actual venue.

Re: Furious at future MIL!!

  • I've even thought of postponing it due to the extreme stress this has caused and I can't talk to my mom about this because she's been gone 3 years:(
  • Wait, so she never planned anything?
    That's terrible. =(
    I don't really have any advice, but that really sucks.
  • amm88amm88 member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Love Its First Comment
    That is absolutely terrible, jlteach78! I'm so sorry you're going through this. Take a deep breath and try not to panic. I know it is hard with just a few days to go, but it is also not good to make major decisions under such stress. I'm also sorry about your mom. Is there somebody else besides your FI you can talk to? It always help to just vent until you have a clear head to make practical decisions.

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  • I am so sorry this is happening with only a few days left. Take a deep breath and I would start looking at other options, you then need to have a heart to heart with your FMIL and see what her ideas are to fix the situation. I know it's easier said then done to relax but it's the only way to make clear choices. 

    Hopefully everything will work it self out.
  • Ladies,
    You are so sweet and kind:)  The only other option if she doesn't pull a rabbit out of her you know what, is to have it our home.  We have a large backyard, big deck, etc.  My FI is planning a menu he will cook and take care because he doesn't want me this upset, I love that man:)  I just don't want something I'll regret because we threw it together in 17 days:(
  • I do feel for you - I'm an April 26th bride too, but I'm confused. Did you not have any say in the reception for your wedding and are just now learning, 17 days out, that nothing is booked? I understand (kind of) having a hands-off approach, but not walking through the space or knowing the venue's restrictions or policies so that you can plan the wedding & reception properly is a little odd. Just saying.
  • aefowler, I have been thinking the same thing. I have been to our venue twice and we have been emailing with the coordinator regularly. This does sound like a terrible situation but it seems like there were a lot of opportunities when this could have been avoided. You didn't want to pick the menu? See the seating chart? Best of luck to you, sincerely. It sounds like your house might be a good alternative.
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