Registry and Gift Forum

Complaints about my registry?!

I am hearing complaints that I don't have enough "big" things on my registry.  Our wedding is small - about 65-75 and I am told about 20 people are coming to the shower.  Me and my FI have lived together, in our own home, for a few years now.  I don't need/want much.  I have 1 large item ($400 ) and then a few in the $100-200 range, which have mostly been bought (anything over $150 has been purchased).    I honestly don't have any need for people to be me expensive gifts, just because they feel they need to.  None of the smaller items have been purchases, but it's those random kitchen things I'd actually use.   Do I just leave it alone? 

Re: Complaints about my registry?!

  • If there isn't anything you actually want in a higher price range I would leave it as it is.  People are smart enough to either give you money (and you can spend it after the wedding on the items you want most) or to combine similar gifts until they reach the amount of money they want to spend.
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  • Yeah if there's nothing else you need/want in that price range, just let it go and use the cash to buy the smaller registry items yourself. I actually DID go back and add one more item in the price range you're talking about, because the few pieces I had for those prices were immediately purchased. (And so far those are the ONLY registry pieces that have been purchased, with 2.5 weeks left.) I didn't add this item at first because I thought with four such priced items it might be "too much" to add a fifth, but after they were snapped up right away, I thought why not?
  • Are the smaller items stuff like kitchen gadgets and dish towels?   If so, I can understand guests not wanting to get them because it feels like a lame gift to give.   But if there is honestly nothing else you need/want, then there is nothing else you can do.

  • vmj23vmj23 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer

    Are the smaller items stuff like kitchen gadgets and dish towels?   If so, I can understand guests not wanting to get them because it feels like a lame gift to give.   But if there is honestly nothing else you need/want, then there is nothing else you can do.

    some kitchen gadgets, bakeware, some specialty cookware and then different pieces that match the set of dishes - gravy boat, cream/sugar holder type things.  I guess I can see people not wanting to get a couple little things and it looking like a lame gift, even though those are the things i need!    But there is nothing i can think of to add, so it is what it is i guess!   It's hard when i've been buying anything/everythign I want over the years! I thought with just a small shower I wouldn't really need to register for a lot, i didn't expect people to be buying the more expensive items .
  • I hear you. Small, inexpensive items can feel like a lame gift, but then again if people wanted to make a gift basket out of things it would be great!
    I don't even have the guts to register for big-ticket items. I just added a storage ottoman for $149 because FI and I could really use that, but I'd be shocked if anyone bought it. The next most expensive thing is a four-slice toaster (my dream!!) for $70.  If anyone told me I needed to add more expensive stuff I wouldn't have a clue what to add.  We're just not that couple that uses high-priced gadgets. 

    Don't change anything. People will figure something out. Better they do that than you end up with expensive stuff you'll never use. 
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  • I hear ya on the not wanting to get the small kitchen gadgets and it feeling lame... my cousin is getting married next month and I was looking over his/his fiancee's registry and they've got a LOT of that sort of thing.  My budget is only $50-$60 ish, and they have lots of $13-$15 nice brand kitchen things, but I'd feel really lameo getting them like a spatula, a cheese slicer, an apple corer, and a vegetable peeler.  Or three towels at $19.99 each.  KWIM?  I'm not judging on them for wanting these nice brand things, but I'd rather get a gift I felt good about giving.  (I know...not about me...suck it up and give them three towels.)
  • vmj23vmj23 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer

    I know i've been the person in that past that doesn't want to buy those random little things!  I always shop off registries right away so i can get my pick at the best thing in my price range lol! I tried to take that into consideration when doing the registry and avoiding anything I can buy myself at home goods or marshalls for 1/2 the price.   But it's so hard when we truely don't need things!

  • csuavecsuave member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited April 2014

    I had about 50 items on my registry for a shower with a 25 person invite list.  It was everything I could think of.  We got a couple of complaints.  It turned out those complaints came from the people that shopped first and were the very people that had snatched up the high price items -- the "early shoppers." 

    This leads me to believe that the odds and ends that are left on the registry will go to the "last minute shoppers."  Based on my experience this group of shoppers won't care too much about what they buy; they will just go to the store and get what is left.  If gathering up small items at the store seems like too much work then they will probably just get a gift card to the store. 

    Long story short, I think you are fine to keep the registry as is.

  • I usually have a set budget in mind. I'll buy small stuff as an add-on to a bigger gift, assuming it's somehow relevant (measuring spoons with a mixer, or coffee mugs with a teakettle, that sort of deal.) But I'm a big gift basket type, so it's a logical way to shop for me.
  • kitty8403 said:
    I usually have a set budget in mind. I'll buy small stuff as an add-on to a bigger gift, assuming it's somehow relevant (measuring spoons with a mixer, or coffee mugs with a teakettle, that sort of deal.) But I'm a big gift basket type, so it's a logical way to shop for me.
    I'm the same way. I recently went to the wedding of a close friend and I had planned on making a cupcake gift basket centered around this cupcake tin they had registered for from BBB. I was really disappointed that BBB didn't have any in stock when FI and I went to shop. I had it all planned out: the cupcake tin, some cute measuring cups and spatulas they had registered for, two cake mixes and some frosting (maybe even icing tips), cupcake papers. UGH! So disappointed with the tupperware we ended up agreeing on. Only thing in our price range that we could agree on that was in stock.

    On the other hand, I'm really excited to register for our wedding! :)
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  • jenni1221 said:
    I am hearing complaints that I don't have enough "big" things on my registry.  Our wedding is small - about 65-75 and I am told about 20 people are coming to the shower.  Me and my FI have lived together, in our own home, for a few years now.  I don't need/want much.  I have 1 large item ($400 ) and then a few in the $100-200 range, which have mostly been bought (anything over $150 has been purchased).    I honestly don't have any need for people to be me expensive gifts, just because they feel they need to.  None of the smaller items have been purchases, but it's those random kitchen things I'd actually use.   Do I just leave it alone? 
    Are there any upgrade items you could use?  Another set of sheets or some new wine glasses?  Just a thought if you wanted to add a couple more "bigger" things on.

    I like buying one "big" gift and maybe giving one or two smaller gifts that go with the big gift.  I hate trying to match up 8 or 10 small gifts.  This is why I shop pretty soon after I receive shower invites!
  • vmj23vmj23 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    I didn't end up changing anything, and end up with a lot of gift cards at my shower, and very few of the "little items" bought.  So i'll just buy them myself!  
  • LlikotdesserdLlikotdesserd member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited April 2014
    A friend got married a few years ago, and I was slow to buy a gift from the registry. The things that I wanted to purchase had already been snatched up, and the only things that were left were kitchen stuff, which I didn't want to buy them because these 2 people just DON'T cook, and I know it, so I didn't want to buy them things that would never get used. I ended up just getting them a visa giftcard, and they used it to buy their toasting flutes and knife and server set for the reception, so they were thrilled. Don't knock a giftcard or cash- it can help defer the cost of the wedding!
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