Background/info: I am a chemist. Above me is my supervisor (there is one for each area in my department), then the assistant manager, and manager. My supervisor and assistant manager are both women, but all of my peers are men.
Two weeks ago, they fired the supervisor in another area but in my same department. The bosses have not made any decision about a replacement for fired guy. We have been in limbo for two weeks. I (and others in the dept.) believe that my friend, John* should be his replacement. He already works in the area, is very knowledgeable, and wants the job. There have been rumors that instead, my supervisor will be his replacement and they will promote me to head of my area (or she will be head of both areas but I will have more responsibility - the more plausible option, IMO). Fueling these rumors is the fact that a new guy started this week and I have been training him in my area since my supervisor is on vacation (another reason to think she will be promoted - they can't announce anything without talking to her first).
This isn't going over well with John. He doesn't like my supervisor. He doesn't want to train someone he sees as undeserving for the job he wants (understandable). He resents that I may be getting a promotion over him. However, since she isn't here, he is taking this out on me. John and I usually get along well. We went to college together and I got the job at his referral. But he can be an ass. I can take a lot, especially because I'd rather stay professional at work. But he was REALLY grinding my gears this week. Cases in point:
1. A new guy started and I am in charge of training him. I am most certainly not going to speak the way I speak to John, my friend of 5 years, to a guy I just met. Because of this, I was accused by John and another co-worker (also a male) that I was "acting all high and mighty in front of the new guy to impress him because I obviously want to suck his dick."
2. I sometimes have to take samples to another department to be prepared. According to John, because they are all men, it's a given that do what I ask because I "flirt with and shake my tits at them."
3. The manager (a male) only likes me because I have tits and am nice to look at. Because I suck at my job.
I know these things aren't true. In my yearly review last year, both the assistant manager and manager told me I was doing a wonderful job and that I would have no problem moving up in the company. Today I had my quarterly review and I was told that they value my opinion and that I am excelling in my area (they had gone through three [3!!!!!] people before me that could not do what I do).
What bothers me the most is that John is supposed to be my friend. He is very opinionated and isn't afraid to tell you what he's thinking. I like this about him, but he is often downright mean (side note - he doesn't seem to understand that this behavior is why he will probably be passed over for promotions). Obviously, from the feedback I've been given, my bosses don't think this about me - thank goodness.
I'm not looking for advice. I know I should, in a perfect world, report him to HR. I'm not going to do that. We joke around a lot and most days it's harmless. I also understand that what he says is a reflection on no one but him. I just needed to vent. I try to take everything in stride but this past week I worked a ton of overtime and I am tired, cranky, and at the end of my rope.
Thank you all for listening. I welcome all advice/similar stories to make me feel less alone.
***UPDATE***
Today I came into work and John had brought me "sorry for being such an asshole last week" chocolate chip cookies from Trader Joe's. Those are the words he used. Verbatim. I'm glad that he saw what a douche he was being and tried to make up for it. Hopefully he will be more conscious of his words and actions in the future. I'll certainly be watching and listening.