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NWR but Etiquette story I had to share

TwowarlocksTwowarlocks member
First Anniversary First Comment
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
I recently got a baby shower invitation from my first cousin in Ohio. We're friends on Facebook but she doesn't use it much. I DIDN"T KNOW SHE WAS PREGNANT. 

It felt way too gift grabby to me, to announce a pregnancy like that. She's due in March btw.
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Re: NWR but Etiquette story I had to share

  • SJM7538SJM7538 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    Maybe she figured you heard in through the grapevine. I'm not super close with every one of my first cousins i still I'm still inviting them to the wedding. Just decline and be done with it
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  • s-aries8990s-aries8990 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    It's not that weird. If you think it's a gift grab, don't go.
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  • jessicabessicajessicabessica member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    If you don't want to go and don't want to give a gift, then don't.  I don't think it's gift grabby, though.  I agree with PP that she probably thought you would have heard it from others in your family by now.  She's probably announced the pregancy to the people she's close to, and there's no rule that she has to do a FB announcement.
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  • daubachsgirl23daubachsgirl23 member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    edited January 2013
    I don't think it's rude, but you are not obligated to attend. Pregnancy can be a really private thing for people. We didn't even tell our parents until 12 weeks. We announced on Facebook so that people would know, in case the "grapevine" didn't work, but a Facebook announcement is not required. Announcing is a really personal decision, and I wouldn't take offense to it. ETA: wonky TK mobile grammar.
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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-but-etiquette-story-i-had-to-share?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:c5c6c4a5-a6ec-472d-9b24-4865ff99d1cdPost:b2c56dab-3284-4f11-9777-6e625e83482e">Re: NWR but Etiquette story I had to share</a>:
    [QUOTE]If you don't want to go and don't want to give a gift, then don't.  I don't think it's gift grabby, though.  I agree with PP that she probably thought you would have heard it from others in your family by now.  She's probably announced the pregancy to the people she's close to, and there's no rule that she has to do a FB announcement.
    Posted by jessicabessica[/QUOTE]

    This.

    Don't jump directly to the conclusion of gift grabby.  She most likely already thought you knew about her pregnancy seeing as she is about 7.5-8 months along at this point.

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  • Jager1219Jager1219 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    I'm with everyone above.  It's your first cousin - not a distant relative.  And kudos to your cousin for NOT annoucing the pregnancy on FB.  I feel like some people can put TMI on there (both for weddings and babies).
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  • freebread03freebread03 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    I put NOTHING on facebook.  I've been engaged for over 1.5 years, and I've never put it on facebook, and anyone who doesn't know me very well and sees me frequently would have no idea I was engaged.  Just because it's not on facebook doesn't mean that sending you a baby shower invite is at ALL against etiquette, and it certainly doesn't sound like a gift grab to me.  She's including you because you're FAMILY.  If this were a wedding invitation, would you feel the same?
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  • TwowarlocksTwowarlocks member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-but-etiquette-story-i-had-to-share?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:c5c6c4a5-a6ec-472d-9b24-4865ff99d1cdPost:21bd00f5-5bc1-4f19-b41e-be5fbd34b019">Re: NWR but Etiquette story I had to share</a>:
    [QUOTE]I put NOTHING on facebook.  I've been engaged for over 1.5 years, and I've never put it on facebook, and anyone who doesn't know me very well and sees me frequently would have no idea I was engaged.  Just because it's not on facebook doesn't mean that sending you a baby shower invite is at ALL against etiquette, and it certainly doesn't sound like a gift grab to me.  She's including you because you're FAMILY.  If this were a wedding invitation, would you feel the same?
    Posted by freebread03[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>As a matter of fact, I would be offended if I heard she was getting married, by receiving a wedding invitation. </div><div>
    </div><div>To other posters, I declined because it's a 12 hour trip I couldn't make in such short notice. 

    </div>
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