Online RSVP??

amcjbb · May 2014

We are having a formal wedding and I have two questions: 1) Is it okay to have an online RSVP instead of a reply card RSVP? 2) If so, how can we word it to encourage people to respond online and only call if they are scared of the internet?

CMGragain · May 2014

I am not sure what you are asking. Are you trying to avoid response cards? If you do use a website for RSVPs, be sure to give people an alternative way to respond, such as a phone number.

amcjbb · May 2014

We would rather do an online rsvp but we are having a formal wedding. I see mixed reviews of this issue online amongst other brides.

lyndausvi · May 2014

amcjbb said:

We are having a formal wedding and I have two questions: 1) Is it okay to have an online RSVP instead of a reply card RSVP? 2) If so, how can we word it to encourage people to respond online and only call if they are scared of the internet?

Now that is just silly. Provide both an online version and a phone number and let the cards fall where they will.

We put an email and phone as RSVP for my dad's party (invited 110 people). 80% were via email. 10% were via phone and the other 10% oddly were from FB message. Not even an official option. Whatever, at least I got a RSVP.

Point is getting the RSVP is more important that HOW you get the RSVP.

Maggie0829 · May 2014

An online RSVP makes me think that a wedding is more casual. So if you are having a formal wedding then you should really use response cards.

Why do you want online RSVPs as opposed to reply cards?

beachyone15 · May 2014

Just something to consider: If I received an online invite/RSVP option, I would not think it is going to be a formal wedding. Are you sending out formal, printed invitations?

lyndausvi · May 2014

I'm just going to say that back in the day RSVP cards were never sent out. As the recipient you were responsible for letting the host know if you could attend or not. Most of the time you send back the RSVP via your own personal note cards. Some people think RSVP cards in invites are insulting. Like the sender does not understand the invitee needs to respond to an invitation.

At some point people sent out RSVP cards as a courtesy. Now it's become the only acceptable way to RSVP for some people. I find that to be a little silly. How cares how they RSVP as long as they do RSVP. I also do not feel like an electronic form of RSVP makes the wedding less formal.

The formality of the INVITE sets the tone, not how you respond to the invite.

Just my thoughts on the issue. Carry-on.

KGold80 · May 2014

My wedding is fairly formal and we're doing online RSVPs, but also provided guests with my email address and phone number as alternate ways to RSVP. We're currently 10 days out from the RSVP deadline and only about 50% have responded so far. Of those, most have used the online RSVP system and said they were pleased with how simple it was to use.

Maggie0829 · May 2014

Yeah the traditional way was to respond via your own personal stationary but that practice hasn't occurred for many years and the reply card took its place. The reply card is not as personal as a self-written note but you still have to fill it out by hand which does lead to some personalization by the guest(s). And with the internet and email and FB becoming the main form of communication today I can see people wanting to go the easy route and have people do online RSVPs. But IMO an email or clicking yes on a RSVP website is just so impersonal, like you are answering a work email or liking someone's post of FB.

I mean if online RSVPs are now deemed as okay then online invites should also be deemed okay regardless of the formality of the event.

I don't know, I guess getting a letter in the mail (and not my inbox) feels more important and personal then getting an email. And thus getting a RSVP in the mail feels more important and personal then getting a email message from my RSVP website saying that so and so said they are coming.

amcjbb · May 2014

@KGold80 you are a woman after my own heart! Love the karen with wine picture!

We are sending out formal printed invitations. We are thinking of doing it online to save money on postage and extra envelopes.

KGold80 · May 2014

I should mention that my FI wanted online RSVPs to save a few bucks. I wanted paper response cards and I do still wish we had used them because I LOOOOOOOOOVE getting stuff in the mail (other than junk). However, it was not a hill I was willing to die on, so I went with what he wanted on this particular issue. Compromise...a necessary evil.

and I HEART Karen and wine...

amcjbb · May 2014

Me too! Jack and Karen were two of the best characters on TV.

My fiance and I are in the same boat. I want paper response cards and he wants online. We are in the debating it phase.

Jen4948 · May 2014

How formal is your wedding going to be?

For a formal wedding, you do need paper RSVPs. (Actually, for the most formal weddings, the guests are supposed to handwrite their replies, but that's seldom done.)

For more informal weddings, people still tend to prefer paper over online RSVPing. With electronic RSVPs there's still the possibility of a glitch; it also suggests that you don't take the invitations very seriously and therefore, neither should the guests.

Also, I don't know how you could word "Don't call unless you are scared of the Internet" in a polite way. I have relatives who scarcely ever use the Internet but still have email and Facebook accounts, and they're not going to use them to RSVP. My BF's mother doesn't have an Internet connection or even a working computer in her home (he uses his smartphone and public computers when he needs a computer, which is pretty often-yes, he lives with her).

Online RSVP??

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