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NWR: Etiquette for House Warming (really Open House) Party

AprilH81AprilH81 member
First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
DH and I bought a new house on May 22nd (whoohoo!!!).  We originally scheduled an Open House for July 12th but we are getting a lot of declines from VIPs (my parents, sister/BIL and some very good friends). We are going to reschedule it since a good 1/2 of our guest list won't be able to make it.  

We are also getting ready to start a kitchen remodel that will include new flooring, new counter tops/back splash and either re-facing or replacing the cabinets.  The remodel is scheduled to take 6-8 weeks and and we will be discussing the start date with our contractor tomorrow when we go over his quote in person.

My research found that house warming or open house parties are usually thrown within the first 3 months of moving in.  Should we try to squeeze our open house in before the remodel starts or would we be okay to wait until after the kitchen is done and AW both the new house and new kitchen at the same time?  Waiting for after the remodel will most likely put us into month 4 or 5 of being in the house...
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Re: NWR: Etiquette for House Warming (really Open House) Party

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    photokittyphotokitty mod
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    I think six months is fine. You can have an open house anytime you want. In my circle house warmings aren't gift giving events, outside of your normal hostess gift (i.e. bottle of wine, candy, etc) so I wouldn't side eye a house warming 6+ months out.
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

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    STARMOON44STARMOON44 member
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    Have you actually invited people or just floated the idea to VIPs? If you've invited and some people have said yes, I think it would be very rude to them to reschedule. It's saying they aren't important to you.

    If you've just floated the date to VIPs then I think post removal is fine. That's when people usually want to show off the house.
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    AprilH81AprilH81 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    STARMOON44 said:
    Have you actually invited people or just floated the idea to VIPs? If you've invited and some people have said yes, I think it would be very rude to them to reschedule. It's saying they aren't important to you. If you've just floated the date to VIPs then I think post removal is fine. That's when people usually want to show off the house.
    We did a Facebook invite and we only have a few people who say they are coming and they are all local so if we cancel/reschedule in the next few days it would still be about 3 weeks notice of the cancellation.

    We wouldn't say it would be because other people can't make it (although that would be the reason) we would use the kitchen remodel as the primary reason.
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    Teddy917Teddy917 member
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    TBH if I were invited via Facebook to an Open House, I would assume it was something I didn't have to RSVP for. I would just come between the time you said it was and hang out for an hour at most and leave. But I might be doing it wrong. That's just how I interpret Open House.
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    AprilH81AprilH81 member
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    scribe95 said:
    There is a difference between people not responding yet and people who have declined. Have most of your guests actually declined? Cause it is weeks away. I wouldn't RSVP that early to an open house. 

    SIB

    Yes, we have had actual declines...  My sister and BIL will be out of town for a wedding and they want my parents to watch their three kids (which means they can't come).  Other friends have to work, some people on vacation, etc.

    We wouldn't be worrying about rescheduling if it was just lack of response.  We are getting actual declines.  My feelings aren't hurt, I completely understand, but it is also easy enough to reschedule.
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    photokittyphotokitty mod
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited June 2014
    I think it is perfectly fine to reschedule a party. It would not be ok to reschedule and not invite everyone originally invited. If something comes up and you have to cancel a party it's not rude - it's rude to uninvite people.

    I would go a step further that just canceling the party on Facebook though and call everyone and tell them you need to cancel due to renovations and you will be in touch wight he new date.

    If over half the guest list can't come, I don't think rescheduling says that certain guests are no important, but rather everyone is important and would want to have as many of the guests there as possible. Next time check with VIPs first :)
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

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    AprilH81AprilH81 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    photokitty said:
    I think it is perfectly fine to reschedule a party. It would not be ok to reschedule and not invite everyone originally invited. If something comes up and you have to cancel a party it's not rude - it's rude to uninvite people.

    I would go a step further that just canceling the party on Facebook though and call everyone and tell them you need to cancel due to renovations and you will be in touch wight he new date.

    If over half the guest list can't come, I don't think rescheduling says that certain guests are no important, but rather everyone is important and would want to have as many of the guests there as possible. Next time check with VIPs first :)
    Guest list would remain the same (possibly even larger)...

    I knew we wouldn't get 100% attendance, but since my sister has three kids (3 year old and 15 month old twins) they never go anywhere so it never crossed my mind they would be out of town and need my parents to watch the kids.  lol

    They were so disappointed to miss it that I already felt bad, when we were getting other declines and decided to go ahead with the remodel I thought it would make sense to reschedule.

    I just wanted to make sure that I wouldn't get too many side-eyes for an Open House 4-5 months after moving in.
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    lc07lc07 member
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    I would not side-eye you. A functional kitchen is a necessary part of hosting an event in your home. Even though you're living there, your house isn't ready for hosting with a remodel under way. That makes perfect sense to me and would be NBD to me. I realize you COULD have the party before the remodel but that doesn't matter IMO. You are waiting until the house is prepared for hosting friends and family.
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    AprilH81AprilH81 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Teddy917 said:
    TBH if I were invited via Facebook to an Open House, I would assume it was something I didn't have to RSVP for. I would just come between the time you said it was and hang out for an hour at most and leave. But I might be doing it wrong. That's just how I interpret Open House.

    **stuck in box**

    This is what we hope will happen.  :)  If people want to hang out the whole time then great...  We just want people to swing by for a visit and a tour, eat some snacks and then leave if they want to.

    We also called it an Open House (versus Housewarming) because we wanted to lessen any expectations of gifts since we just got married 6 months ago.  
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