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Writing a ceremony from start to finish

sarahtrgsarahtrg member
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in Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions
My fiance and I are planning on creating a wedding ceremony that is uniquely us by writing everything start to finish. But I don't even know where to start! Is there a basic outline that most ceremonies follow? Does anyone have any suggestions or resources I could get some inspiration from? Thanks!
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Re: Writing a ceremony from start to finish

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    CMGragainCMGragain member
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    Are you religious at all?  This is important to many people.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
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    RebeccaFlowerRebeccaFlower member
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    My officiant provided us with an outline we loved, so I would ask yours but there is also a ton online, from what I've read here. 

    Things I would think about...
    1) How long do you want your ceremony to be? Most secular seem to be around 20 minutes. I went to one that was like literally 6 minutes and I felt like it was a little lame to be over so quickly. Not that you should have a bunch of filler, either. 
    2) Your vows should be personal but not silly. I went to one wedding that they didn't actually vow anything and all they talked about was inside jokes. No cool from a guest perspective. 

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    CMGragainCMGragain member
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    edited August 2014
    sarahtrg said:
    My fiance and I are planning on creating a wedding ceremony that is uniquely us by writing everything start to finish. But I don't even know where to start! Is there a basic outline that most ceremonies follow? Does anyone have any suggestions or resources I could get some inspiration from? Thanks!
    Make certain that your ceremony is not so "unique"  (I hate that word) that it is disrespectful to the importance of the occasion.  It must state what is happening (uniting in marriage).  Any vows beyond that are not legal, but simply public promises.

    http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=5&ved=0CEMQFjAE&url=http://www.captadam.com/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderfiles/captadamceremonies.pdf&ei=TkX5U5jzAsf1igKCiYFI&usg=AFQjCNGb1EXusugQ5SVd1dBC7cG6PKmwzQ&sig2=AFSBzjUCPaqXXPtYG0DPRQ&bvm=bv.73612305,d.cGE






    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
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    artbyallieartbyallie mod
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    You could start by researching the marriage laws for the county and state in which you will be wed. They may require a declaration of intent or some other form of vows (usually at minimum an "I do" or "I will" affirming that you are both entering into this of your own free will).

    But could you please clarify what you mean when you say 'uniquely us?' And is your officiant willing to read whatever you write? Some may wish to impose a little structure or content of their own.
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    Jen4948Jen4948 member
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    However "uniquely you" you want your ceremony to be, be careful with the wording of your vows.  Aside from any legal and religious requirements, what you are inviting your guests to witness is your joining as a family socially, legally, and possibly religiously. 

    I'd limit recitations of how much you love each other, "unity rituals," and humor.  Too much of any of this will turn off your guests and make your ceremony appear as though you and your FI don't appreciate that you are taking a major serious step in your lives and relationship as well as appear AWish.  Also, your officiant, and if you are marrying in a house of worship, the congregation may not be okay with them.
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    emmyg65emmyg65 member
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    http://apracticalwedding.com/2013/06/how-to-write-your-wedding-ceremony/
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    sarahtrgsarahtrg member
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    @CMGragain - We are somewhat religious but are not currently practicing. 
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    sarahtrgsarahtrg member
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    Thanks to everyone for their feedback. My father is actually the officiant so we are going to work closely with him to create our ceremony. We just don't want something cookie cutter.
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    southernbelle0915southernbelle0915 mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    We wrote our own ceremony. We started by using the rough outline of the elements of a wedding ceremony, what they mean, etc. Our officiant helped us with some samples. We researched and read his samples. Then we used things we liked, and wrote our own material for stuff we didn't like. 
    *********************************************************************************

    image
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    mrpbn7mrpbn7 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    I wrote our ceremony - leaving a few spots for our officiant (a friend) to fill in so there were still some surprises. Feel free to use it as a guide or lift whatever you want. Took me forever to do, but it was worth it. It's here: http://loveparty2014.com/2014/09/09/full-ceremony/
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    jenijoykjenijoyk member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    @mrpbn7 I love your ceremony! Especially the unity box part! I won't lift your words, but I'm totally stealing the idea of talking about where we hope to be in 10 years for my wine/beer box ceremony if that is ok with you! It's really a sweet idea!
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    Karens62Karens62 member
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    @mrpbn7, that was absolutely beautiful, thanks for sharing
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