Wedding Party

I was going to ask a Friend to be my MOH but...

My wedding is in July and I was going to ask my good friend to be my MOH this week.
She just texted me last night saying that she is due with her first child in March. I am very excited for her but now I am not sure if asking her to be my MOH will put too much stress on her. I know the decision is up to her but I feel bad asking and making it seem like I am blowing off her exciting news. 
Am I over thinking this? Has anyone else been in this position? 
Thanks! 

Re: I was going to ask a Friend to be my MOH but...

  • Yes you are over thinking this.  All a MOH has to do is buy the dress and show up clean and sober in said dress on your wedding day.  So the only way she will feel stressed is if she either puts too much pressure on herself or you put too much pressure on her to do things that she is not required to do.

  • MnHGirl said:
    My wedding is in July and I was going to ask my good friend to be my MOH this week.
    She just texted me last night saying that she is due with her first child in March. I am very excited for her but now I am not sure if asking her to be my MOH will put too much stress on her. I know the decision is up to her but I feel bad asking and making it seem like I am blowing off her exciting news. 
    Am I over thinking this? Has anyone else been in this position? 
    Thanks! 

    If this is who you want as MOH, then ask her!  I would recommend that you wait until after she delivers her baby to have her order her dress.  Or let her buy any dress in X color off the rack somewhere.

    My BFF was 6 months pregnant when a bride told her she needed to order her BM dress.  There was more than enough time to wait until she had the baby to get measured and place the order.  Once the dress came in, it was huge.  The seamstress had to rip out all the boning and restructure the dress to get it to fit properly.  She spent almost as much on alterations as she did on the dress.

  • One of my friends was her sister's MOH less than a month after her daughter was born. It's totally doable.
  • Echoing PPs... your MOH (and rest of wedding party) aren't planning your wedding and shouldn't be asked to help with anything other than getting their dresses... and the earlier you ask her, the better she can prepare for when to get her dress, etc.  I know you're trying to make life easier for your friend, but I think she would be touched to be your MOH, rather than be treated differently because she's having a baby.
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers


  • MnHGirlMnHGirl member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited September 2014
    Thanks everyone! My mom is a seamstress and said that if got her dress size soon and order a couple sizes larger then it should be ok. She would do the alterations to make it smaller and would not charge her anything. I do not have any ridiculous expectations and one of my sisters was already talking about planning a shower in the spring (I did not ask her but she brought it up since I get really busy).
  • MnHGirl said:
    My wedding is in July and I was going to ask my good friend to be my MOH this week.
    She just texted me last night saying that she is due with her first child in March. I am very excited for her but now I am not sure if asking her to be my MOH will put too much stress on her. I know the decision is up to her but I feel bad asking and making it seem like I am blowing off her exciting news. 
    Am I over thinking this? Has anyone else been in this position? 
    Thanks! 

    If this is who you want as MOH, then ask her!  I would recommend that you wait until after she delivers her baby to have her order her dress.  Or let her buy any dress in X color off the rack somewhere.

    My BFF was 6 months pregnant when a bride told her she needed to order her BM dress.  There was more than enough time to wait until she had the baby to get measured and place the order.  Once the dress came in, it was huge.  The seamstress had to rip out all the boning and restructure the dress to get it to fit properly.  She spent almost as much on alterations as she did on the dress.

    This.  I know it is not your question, OP but just in case there are any lurkers around...I was just in a wedding this month and was 28 weeks pregnant.  By NO fault of the bride, I had to order the dress with absolutely no idea what size I'd be.  The salon convinced me to order it very big and when it came in, it had to be completely taken apart and redone.  Had to rip out all the boning, add straps (because it wouldn't stay up without the boning), reconfigure the rouching and zipper...LUCKILY we have a family friend who is a seamstress and did all this for no charge but when I got quoted at some other places, I would have paid almost the same price as the dress for alterations. 
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