Wedding Recap and Withdrawal

Timeline of name change?

Okay, so I got married 3 months ago.  I am taking DH's last name.  We got our marriage certificate about 2 weeks after the wedding.  About a week later I changed my name on Social Security & Drivers license.  After my new ID's came, I change it at my banks, since it's critical to have ID match account name. Since then, I haven't done much of anything with name change. I kind of lost motivation. I made of list of everywhere I need to change it.  I was over 2 pages long, and included even things like Amazon & Netflix accounts and frequent flier miles, so it was pretty inclusive.  And I think doing that detailed of a list may have scared me off a bit, since it is a lot of places.  I know not everywhere is critical to change right away and some I can just do as I go along (like changing it at vet office when I take dogs for their next checkup). But, I know I should get on some of them, like medical insurance & doctor offices. Most of them at this point can be done through mail or e-mail, like passport and most utilities, but a few still need to be in person, which means taking time off work. And some don't have any info on process to change it, so I need to call them to figure it out, which may also require taking time off work to do. I have a basic letter already written up (actually two, one is more generic and one is specifically for doctors/medical) that I can mail/e-mail out with marriage certificate. So, really I just need to figure out where to send to and just do it. But, I'm starting to feel bad that I haven't done anything with it in 2 months. I don't want DH to think I'm stalling or hesitating on the decision to take his name.  And it's also getting a bit annoying to use different names depending on what I'm doing, since some stuff has changed and some I'm still using maiden name.

Anyway, for those that have been through this process, did you change everything right away?  Or just change things as you went along?  Any advice to make the process seem less overwhelming?

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Re: Timeline of name change?


  • nicoann said:

    Okay, so I got married 3 months ago.  I am taking DH's last name.  We got our marriage certificate about 2 weeks after the wedding.  About a week later I changed my name on Social Security & Drivers license.  After my new ID's came, I change it at my banks, since it's critical to have ID match account name. Since then, I haven't done much of anything with name change. I kind of lost motivation. I made of list of everywhere I need to change it.  I was over 2 pages long, and included even things like Amazon & Netflix accounts and frequent flier miles, so it was pretty inclusive.  And I think doing that detailed of a list may have scared me off a bit, since it is a lot of places.  I know not everywhere is critical to change right away and some I can just do as I go along (like changing it at vet office when I take dogs for their next checkup). But, I know I should get on some of them, like medical insurance & doctor offices. Most of them at this point can be done through mail or e-mail, like passport and most utilities, but a few still need to be in person, which means taking time off work. And some don't have any info on process to change it, so I need to call them to figure it out, which may also require taking time off work to do. I have a basic letter already written up (actually two, one is more generic and one is specifically for doctors/medical) that I can mail/e-mail out with marriage certificate. So, really I just need to figure out where to send to and just do it. But, I'm starting to feel bad that I haven't done anything with it in 2 months. I don't want DH to think I'm stalling or hesitating on the decision to take his name.  And it's also getting a bit annoying to use different names depending on what I'm doing, since some stuff has changed and some I'm still using maiden name.

    Anyway, for those that have been through this process, did you change everything right away?  Or just change things as you went along?  Any advice to make the process seem less overwhelming?

    We have been married for about a month and a half. I've changed most of the "big" stuff - driver's license, SIN, banks, health card, insurance, etc. I am waiting to change my passport because I already have a trip booked in my maiden name, and my passport has to match what the trip was booked with. 

    Everything else I am just sort of "picking at" or changing as I go. So for example if I get a piece of mail or an email with my maiden name from a particular place, I deal with that particular place at that time. I totally feel you about "loosing steam". Now that I have the "important" stuff done the rest doesn't bother me too much. 

    Where are you located? I'm in Canada and married name change is not considered a "legal name change" here; i.e. as soon as you register your marriage, you are free to use your spouse's name, or not, as you see fit, and your birth certificate doesn't change.

    I am not sure what you mean re: your DH thinking you're hesitating when you already have so much done! If you are married and using the name, that's what makes it your name, I think. Not using your new name on your Netflix account doesn't make you any less Mrs. Hisname!
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    Anniversary

  • I got married in May and I still haven't changed everything. I didn't start changing my name until about a month after we got married because I had to find time to go to the social security office and DMV. The first things I changed were social security card, birth certificate, drivers license, and bank account. After that I changed all my credit cards and bills. I've just been working on internet stuff and dumb stuff as it comes up. I didn't bother changing my cable bill because they told me I need to go to an office and the closest one is 45 minutes away from and I'm not taking a half day off work to change the stupid cable bill. 

    I would try to get the major stuff done so that you don't have any issues in trying to get stuff done because your name doesn't match. I would also carry your little marriage certificate card with you until you get everything changed over just so you don't have any problems.
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  • nicoann said:

    Okay, so I got married 3 months ago.  I am taking DH's last name.  We got our marriage certificate about 2 weeks after the wedding.  About a week later I changed my name on Social Security & Drivers license.  After my new ID's came, I change it at my banks, since it's critical to have ID match account name. Since then, I haven't done much of anything with name change. I kind of lost motivation. I made of list of everywhere I need to change it.  I was over 2 pages long, and included even things like Amazon & Netflix accounts and frequent flier miles, so it was pretty inclusive.  And I think doing that detailed of a list may have scared me off a bit, since it is a lot of places.  I know not everywhere is critical to change right away and some I can just do as I go along (like changing it at vet office when I take dogs for their next checkup). But, I know I should get on some of them, like medical insurance & doctor offices. Most of them at this point can be done through mail or e-mail, like passport and most utilities, but a few still need to be in person, which means taking time off work. And some don't have any info on process to change it, so I need to call them to figure it out, which may also require taking time off work to do. I have a basic letter already written up (actually two, one is more generic and one is specifically for doctors/medical) that I can mail/e-mail out with marriage certificate. So, really I just need to figure out where to send to and just do it. But, I'm starting to feel bad that I haven't done anything with it in 2 months. I don't want DH to think I'm stalling or hesitating on the decision to take his name.  And it's also getting a bit annoying to use different names depending on what I'm doing, since some stuff has changed and some I'm still using maiden name.

    Anyway, for those that have been through this process, did you change everything right away?  Or just change things as you went along?  Any advice to make the process seem less overwhelming?

    We have been married for about a month and a half. I've changed most of the "big" stuff - driver's license, SIN, banks, health card, insurance, etc. I am waiting to change my passport because I already have a trip booked in my maiden name, and my passport has to match what the trip was booked with. 

    Everything else I am just sort of "picking at" or changing as I go. So for example if I get a piece of mail or an email with my maiden name from a particular place, I deal with that particular place at that time. I totally feel you about "loosing steam". Now that I have the "important" stuff done the rest doesn't bother me too much. 

    Where are you located? I'm in Canada and married name change is not considered a "legal name change" here; i.e. as soon as you register your marriage, you are free to use your spouse's name, or not, as you see fit, and your birth certificate doesn't change.

    I am not sure what you mean re: your DH thinking you're hesitating when you already have so much done! If you are married and using the name, that's what makes it your name, I think. Not using your new name on your Netflix account doesn't make you any less Mrs. Hisname!
    I'm in U.S. I've got all the legal stuff changed at this point. I think medical insurance & doctor office is one that I need to do soon. And I need to change my professional licensing. My license is supposed to match whatever my legal name is, so I shouldn't drag that on too long. I'm using married name for a lot of stuff, but I'm still using maiden too since it isn't changed everywhere. I think DH's concern is that I'm still using mostly my maiden name at work, so I'm still using it on a daily basis. But, that's because I need to use what matches my professional license. So, until I get that changed, I need to keep using maiden name. I am signing work e-mails and such as hyphenated though, to help transition clients into the name change. It is also getting frustrating for me at times because I have 3 different names I use, depending on purpose (personal is married name, professional is maiden or hyphenated depending on what I'm doing). And it's not uncommon for me to use all 3 in one day. But, I'm glad to know I'm not the only person who drags it out. Part of me thinks I should just take a day off work and change it everywhere all at once, just to have it done with. But, that seems silly. It makes more sense to just make sure the important things are changed then work on the others as it comes up.

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  • ark155ark155 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment Name Dropper
    edited September 2014
    @tammym1001 - did you really change your birth certificate??
  • I got married 2 1/2 years ago, changed my name a year and a half ago, and still haven't changed it on everything. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
  • oh...I'm not looking forward to this!
  • AddieCake said:
    I got married 2 1/2 years ago, changed my name a year and a half ago, and still haven't changed it on everything. 

    Ditto. Maybe not the same timeline, but there are still things in my maiden name.
  • We got married a month ago, and I changed my SSN, drivers license, car/renters insurance, banks, and credit cards as soon as we got home from our honeymoon a week ago. I did that all in about 3 hours on a Friday.

    In order to change my car registration to my new name, I needed to update my car title, which I hadn't thought about before, so I did that while I was at the DMV for my license. Still waiting on that in the mail.

    I had to wait for my new SS card to arrive before I could change my name at work, which I just did today. All my insurance is through work, so insurance will be updated and I will get my new insurance cards.

    I am sure there are things I am forgetting to change, but that is all the major/important stuff that I wanted to take care of. It was exciting getting all my new cards and stuff in the mail with my new name.
  • ark155 said:
    @tammym1001 - did you really change your birth certificate??


    STIB:

    No. I typed that out wrong. Oops! I didn't have my birth certificate so I had to get a copy to change my social security card. 
    image
  • I had 99% of my stuff changed with in a week of our wedding.  We got married on Saturday, I picked up certified copies of the marriage license on Thursday and hit up the SS office and the DMV on Friday.  After SS and DMV, most everything else was easy - phone call or showing them a copy of marriage license, new SS card, or new drivers license.  But I've moved a lot so I have a pretty good list worked out of all of my different accounts, their customer service phone numbers, account numbers, etc....from having to change my address previously.

    I really didn't think it is that difficult and I'm so gald I didn't waste my money on one of those name change services.
    Anniversary
  • I found the "official" stuff - SSN and driver's license - to be the most straightforward. It's dumb stuff like frequent flier accounts, cell phone and PayPal that have proved to be the biggest pains. I scanned a copy of our marriage certificate using a scanning app on my phone just so I have it with me all the time; plus I can email or fax a copy of it directly from the app, which has been hugely helpful.
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